[Wenchione]

My boyfriend's daughter, who is 30 years old, just moved up near us. She is a bit controlling and attention seeking, which I am more than capable of handling since my mother was the same way. When I first met her she told me that she had MPD but that she had been through therapy and was integrated. I knew nothing about this and took it in stride.

The other day she had me over for tea to discuss the following nights family dinner which was being held at her house. While talking she starts telling me that one of her other personalities wanted to be in charge during the family dinner. Then with a tiny prompt from me she begins telling me all the names of her different personalities. I have never known anyone with DID and am just not quite sure what to make of all this. I am researching and keeping an open mind. Is this normal behavior for someone with this type of diagnosis to sit and casually talk about the other personalities as if they are different people?

I am really trying to give this woman the benefit of the doubt, but my gut tells me she is attention seeking. Anyway, thanks for any help...

[Violet Blue]

That's a tough call as everyone's experience is so different. How well do you know her? It seems unusual to me that she would be so forthcoming with that information.

DID is shrouded in secrecy. Hiding and covering up is a huge part of daily life. Being integrated by age 30 is not impossible, but 30 is the average age of diagnosis (give or take a few years).

Was there extreme abuse and trauma in her young childhood?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Wenchione

My boyfriend's daughter, who is 30 years old, just moved up near us. She is a bit controlling and attention seeking, which I am more than capable of handling since my mother was the same way. When I first met her she told me that she had MPD but that she had been through therapy and was integrated. I knew nothing about this and took it in stride.

The other day she had me over for tea to discuss the following nights family dinner which was being held at her house. While talking she starts telling me that one of her other personalities wanted to be in charge during the family dinner. Then with a tiny prompt from me she begins telling me all the names of her different personalities. I have never known anyone with DID and am just not quite sure what to make of all this. I am researching and keeping an open mind. Is this normal behavior for someone with this type of diagnosis to sit and casually talk about the other personalities as if they are different people?

I am really trying to give this woman the benefit of the doubt, but my gut tells me she is attention seeking. Anyway, thanks for any help...

for some people yes is is normal for them to be able to casually talk about their alters and for others it is not normal nor easy. you see having this ability goes hand in hand with something called co consciousness.

co-consciousness is things like hearing the alters talking, being able to be aware that the alters exist, knowing what the alters know, being able to be an observer while the alter is in control.... short line in the sand is that there are many different ways a person can be co conscious and there's many different ways DID affects a person, one person may have very little awareness of their alters (which of course limits how co conscious they are with their alters) where as another person may have almost total co-consciousness.

only this person and their own treatment providers can say how much co consciousness this person has and whether what you are asking is a possibility. my answer us in general not specific to this one person as I am not this persons treatment provider so please dont take this as whats going on with this person you are posting about.

suggestion since this person was comfortable with you enough to disclose their disorder and their internal system of alters to you, maybe you can ask her your question, after all it is her internal system right.

[Wenchione]

I am a survivor of abuse myself, and she tends to be very controlling, opinionated and sometimes even rude. I would rather not ask her about her condition and would rather she tell me in her own time what is going on.

She can be very confrontational, manipulative, and tries to dominate everything she is involved in wherever she can. This type of behavior leads me to not promote interactions freely, which is sad because we have many similar interests. Unfortunately she seems to enjoy gloating her knowledge about things I am interested in. Luckily she is very happy to tell me all about everything she knows when she does know I am interested...lol

I have a child and therefore I am very careful about the people in his life. I just worry ...