[DepressionSurvivor]

I am actually here for my friend and here to tell her story to see if someone who has a similar story wouldn't mind contacting her just to talk and maybe she will gain hope from your similar story.

She has been depressed since she was a kid. She also suffers from OCD. Her baseline mood is 'blah' where she is not happy, not sad, and really feeling anything. She has episodes of complete despair, hopelessness, and they are so bad that she contemplates whether or not she wants to be on the earth. She finds if extremely frustrating that she cannot accurately describe to other people what she goes through when she is not in one of her episodes. She become more hopeless at her inability to adequately get across what these episodes are like because she herself has a hard time connecting with any emotions unless she is in this phase. This phases are so intense but also end abruptly leading again to frustration that other people don't take them seriously and she had no idea what happened. She frequently looks at the lives of others and thinks 'if only.' She has a Master's Degree and is a therapist herself but she says she has lost faith in the process of therapy. I have urged and encouraged her and probably gotten mad too much at her. Some other pertinent info includes having a dad who left her family and doesn't care for her, often getting physically sick with feelings of weakness, headaches, etc (blood work and everything is normal), intense fear of throwing up so much so that she would rearrange her life around it, intense need for order or also she can reach her edge and 'freak out', big desire to have a baby one day and despair that others in her life already have children, inability to connect and express emotions, inability to know when she is close to the point of a 'freak out.'

Does anyone have a similar story and would be willing to perhaps call her?

[Travelinglady]

Hi, DepressionSurvivor, and welcome to Psych Central! I'm not sure about anyone calling her, but we can see if we can help. Would she be willing to talk to us here?

How does she feel about psychiatrists and medication?

Feel free to read and post in any of the forums. I think she might find our site helpful, so maybe she would be willing to give us a chance.

Again, welcome! You are a dear friend to post here.