[1MerlinFan]

I'm worried about my close friend because I think she may be developing an eating disorder of some sort.

Here's some background information to help you understand the situation:
My friend in I are both going into our second year of college. We have been friends since we met in first grade, but now we go to different schools six hours away. Because of the distance we don't see each other at all during the school semesters (however we do see each other almost all summer, we used to work together, but she quit last month).

Here's the situation: last year she gained a little weight while she was at school (not very much, certainly not the "freshman fifteen"). When she got home from school last winter and realized that she'd gained some weight she was pretty upset (I've never heard her worry about weight at all before she left for school, but I've seen pictures of her new friends and they are all really skinny). When she went back to school in the spring she talked about going to work out a lot, with the intent to lose weight.

Now that she's home for the summer we've been hanging out a lot and I've noticed some worrying patterns with her eating and weight loss. She's already lost about 25lbs in the last month. (She wasn't over weight enough for that to be normal). Now she's at what would be considered a perfect weight for her height, but she's still wanting to lose more. I've spent a couple weekends with her, and noticed that she doesn't eat all day, and then has only a small dinner at night. She claims it's because she's just not that hungry anymore, but I'm worried it's more than that. We went out for pizza and she ordered two slices but only ate about a third of one of them before asking for a to go box, claiming she was stuffed. She's also stopped eating some of her favorite foods, such as lasagna and other pastas. Some days she calls me and talks about how she "doesn't feel hungry, but hasn't eaten anything all day!" (As though that's a good thing).
She's weighing herself all the time too, constantly keeping track of how much she's losing. She even canceled her meal plan at school, so she can't eat in the cafeteria this next year. She says she's going to start cooking meals in the dorm kitchens or eating out with friends, but I don't know if she will.

She's not at a low weight right now, but I'm afraid that if this keeps going she will develop a full blown eating disorder.

I really don't know what to do, as I'm going to school in Colorado, six hours away from her and can't be there to keep any eye on things. Any suggestions about how I can help her from so far away?

[kaliope]

hi merlinfan
well, I think you are right to be concerned. her pattern certain doesn't seem like a healthy diet. I think you should express your concern to your friend. maybe research eating disorders and show how she fits the pattern for the start of one. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

[1MerlinFan]

Originally Posted by kaliope

hi merlinfan
well, I think you are right to be concerned. her pattern certain doesn't seem like a healthy diet. I think you should express your concern to your friend. maybe research eating disorders and show how she fits the pattern for the start of one. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

First, thank you for the welcome!!

That's what I've been thinking, and I have talked to her about it. But she just denies it, saying that she doesn't have an eating disorder because she's still eating some, and she says she's not starving herself, she's just "not hungry anymore."
But even when she does eat, it's only once a day and not very much. The other day I came over and she had a bag of fast food, and asked if I wanted the rest of it. I told her no thanks (I'd already eaten, and since it looked like maybe only two bites had been taken from the food, I suggested she finish it). Instead, she just threw it out and said she was too full.

I don't know what else to do, I don't know any of her friends at school, so I can't call them and ask them to keep and eye on things, but I'm just lost here..

P.S. I just noticed that this was posted in the wrong forum, I'm so sorry! I thought I was posting in the eating disorders page, but somehow this ended up here. Obviously I'm not her caregiver or partner or anything, but I don't know how to move the post, or if I even can do that. Sorry!