[willow88]

Hi everyone I'm new here. I'm here to learn and gain some sanity. The love of my life may have BPD. From the research I've done and looking back since I've known her and the build up from there to the most recent events as things have really gotten out of control and a bit well I feel like I myself am going crazy.

Since December 1st my world has been a roller coaster although its been a train I've seen coming down the tracks for the last 7+ months now. I've done everything I could without going to couples counselding as she refused. One day there is a list of reasons why she doesn't want to be with me and it won't work another everything feels right in the world as we lay there snuggled together. One day we won't work, she doesn't want to learn to communicate and open up the next she's not my firend she's my girlfriend again. One day I'm not her person the next day she wants to work things out. Things don't go perfect for a couple days and all is lost and we won't be together per her. She claims she's just having doubt and having a hard time letting me go. However there have been so many other actions and words said then this. I cater to her then accused of not folding laundry and making dinner. Well the laundry was in the room where you were having a personal convo on the phone with your brother (she doesn't feel comfortable talking in front of me) and I wantd dinner to be hot for you (it was a quasdilla) but oh she went OFF. I ask whats going on and I love her and care. She yells to go away I tell her again I love her and care. Her reponse "well I don't love you". I turn and go to bed.

She wants to get a new pot for a plant and run errands all in a good mood. Get ont he road and I start up a convo about music. She gets in a weird distant place and it's pulling teeth to have a random convo like I'm an annoying person she barley knows. I tell her I'm over her crazy BS and I don't deserve it and she flips and is so nice and kind.

Last night out of the blue eating wings before the SEC game it was questions about my sexual past and judging me for my one night stand and making fun of the name of the person saying "ooo gross didn't you feel yuck". We're talking about a 32 year old professional who's patients love her as do her co-workers. Not to mention she has had just as "shaddy" sexual past as I have. This morning it was all snuggles & love you.

There have been times I'm talking to her and she'll plug her ears. She'll mock me and mummle stuff like a child. She'll say and do things and then the next day say she didn't. I love her I relocated my life for her and I have no clue what's going on or what to do.

[CANDC]

Hi Willow. Sorry you are so confused dealing with someone with BPD. Hope you find a way to reconcile things with your partner. It is challenging to have the mood swings. Here are two articles that may be a help

Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder | Psych Central

Living with & Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder | World of Psychology

[willow88]

From what I've described does it sound like she may have BPD in your opinion?