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New Member
Member Since Mar 2016
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 3
8 |
Mar 06, 2016 at 02:53 PM
#1
If you have read my post about the backstory of this problem I am in, you must also know that his family is the most pretentious and snobby people I have ever met in my life. It is disheartening to think that his parents were so poor growing up, yet feel compelled to behave this way. Fortunately, my BF is NOTHING like them, but his personality and demeanor do change when he is around them.
Ultimately, I do not care to be best friends with them or to even hang out. But I am terribly concerned about my BF. I don’t believe that he has ever really been happy. He is a total people-pleaser. He has a HUGE social base. However, I find very few of those people to be true friends. Since he doesn’t struggle financially, he tends to have a lot of “friends” who want him to invest in one ridiculous venture after the other or want him to bail them out of jail or pay their rent, etc. Or, they keep him on the fringe, just in case they might need him. Other than money, if someone needs anything at all--an errand, to borrow something—he can’t say no. It’s like his dictionary is completely void of that word! Slowly over the last couple of years, I have influenced him to not say yes so often. To consider the person with whom he is dealing, of what they are asking and whether or not he truly wants to do it or give it. This has proven mostly successful. Over the last few weeks, he has started becoming assertive. He is speaking his mind and if he disagrees, he says it and presents his argument. I am proud of him. The Problem: I’m not sure how to continue to help him to make him a truly happy person. Or to overcome this condition that has burdened life for so long. |
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Poohbah
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,449
9 604 hugs
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Mar 09, 2016 at 05:34 PM
#2
Hello and welcome to psych central!
I have read your backstory as well as this thread. It's quite fascinating. I hope you find some relief soon from what is troubling you. I think it's admirable that you're trying to constructively change the man you're in love with. If he were to post on this forum about challenges with you and your love, what would he say? Are you looking to make some kind of new direction or new decision or new approach towards your boyfriend? I think if he has a mood disorder or a personality disorder professional treatment or self-help would be your best bet. I am very curious about your life and your family and their position on these things. Please share if you're willing. Many of us here are happy to give a good positive feedback. Good luck. Thanks, moogs __________________ Current Status: Stable/High Functioning/Clean and Sober Dx: Bipolar 2, GAD Current Meds: Prozac 30mg, Lamictal 150mg, Latuda 40mg, Wellbutrin 150 XL Previous meds I can share experiences from: AAPs - Risperdal, Abilify, Seroquel SSRIs - Lexapro, Paxil, Zoloft Mood Stabilizers - Tegretol, Depakote, Neurontin Other - Buspar, Xanax Add me as a friend and we can chat 
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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