[Skeezyks]

Hello DTTJ: I'm sorry you are stuck in this most difficult situation. I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

Unfortunately I can't be of any real help with regard to this. However there are many articles in PsychCentral's archives related to narcissism & sociopathy. Here are links to some that may be of some interest:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/archiv...-a-narcissist/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...-a-narcissist/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relat...ving-with-one/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/are-you...-a-narcissist/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...thic-behavior/

May I suggest you introduce yourself over on PC's New Member Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

There's a lot of support that can be available here on PC. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are the chat rooms where you'll be able to interact with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting!

[Tsukaregirl]

I sympathize wholeheartedly. I don't know if these two have NPD, of course, but I wouldn't be surprised (nor would I be surprised about them being sociopaths). I'm sorry that you're stuck with TWO of them, though, which sounds utterly terrifying. I am going through something similar, but with just one person. It's likely only as tough as it is because she is my identical twin. The abuse, though (mostly mental/emotional/verbal, though sometimes physical) is overwhelming. Like you, I can't up and leave the relationship because of life circumstances, especially finance-wise...

However, I'll tell you what I'm doing now to cope!

I'm slowly creating boundaries and setting a distance between my twin and me. Suffice it to say, it's not going too well in that she has turned increasingly nasty, grown extra depressed, and still - of course - refuses to discuss the situation reasonably. If we could do that, I don't think this would be such an issue. But I suspect she has NPD, and I don't think it's possible to reason with someone like this. I can't begin to tell you how much it hurts. I hate her, but I love her. I feel such guilt, and yet I know this is the best for both of us...it's so hard. But it really is for the best.

On top of that, I've learned to tell myself and really KNOW that the cruel, abusive things she says about me and to me are a reflection of her own insecurities. (For example, she refused to let me make my own social media, even though she has her own. She's very controlling like that. When I decided to make one without her permission, it was the start of the worst of our fights last year, and she accused me of being "jealous" of her and that that I'd made my own social media so as to "be the better twin". Mm, right. Okay.)

You can see it clearly there, right? I just wanted to have my own social media to share my photos and thoughts. She didn't want me to, despite having and actively using her own, because she assumed I wanted to be the "better twin" in doing so. Who is the jealous one here?

All that being said, know that there is NOTHING, no truth, to what your abusers say. They say it to make themselves feel better, because I don't doubt, whether they are sociopaths or not, that they have some ugly insecurities inside that they need to find someone, especially someone close to them and regularly around to abuse, to project those insecurities onto. Allow yourself the thought that, sure, you aren't perfect, and you're probably at least a bit depressed dealing with such an awful situation, BUT you are not what they call you. THEY are. Try to trust in yourself. Hold your head up high and know that you are strong for having dealt with this situation as long as you have. When you have the means, you're going to get out of it and be free from them, too. It's been hard, but it's helping me cope.

Also, is there anything you can do to begin to create boundaries, at the very least? Do you think it would put you in danger?

Sending all my best wishes for you! Stay strong!