Issue with a Friend - Need Help

First of all, let me start by saying that I am not bipolar myself. Two of my family members are and my best friend (whom this thread is about) is as well. And that's not to say that I have a firm grip on understanding this illness, I'm only trying to convey that I've had experience with it before. Also, just gonna throw this out there, this post will be long. I apologize for its length but I'm currently going through some rough times trying to figure this whole situation out and figured that I could turn here for some guidance maybe. I also don't know if this is the right forum to post in, so I apologize in advance if I'm breaking some sort of protocol.

Anyways, let's get into it. I met Mike (name changed for anonymity) when we were 13 (now 26) and we were best friends from the start. Always loved hanging out with one another. We were both into sports but also loved good films, music, and having these deep philosophical discussions (looking back, these discussions were probably not deep nor philosophical but we enjoyed them anyway). My point being: we had a ton in common and loved each other's company. At around 18, he got diagnosed with bipolar disorder. At first, everyone just thought he was "crazy" in the high school sense: drinking a lot, smoking weed, overall partying way too much. Turns out he was in a very strong manic phase. He had some trouble recovering but after 6 months, returned to himself.

Around 20, I had to move away from our home state across the country to get help for my drug addiction. I was gone for about 5 years. In that time, Mike and I stayed friends as best we could but didn't talk too often because we were hundreds and hundreds of miles apart. During this time, Mike had one or two more instances where he stopped taking his meds and would go into these very intense, month-long, manic episodes. He'd try buying 100,000 dollar cars; he joined a gospel choir on Sundays (this dude never would do this when healthy), and would start a fight with anyone if they said the slightest thing wrong. He recovered through both times and made the decision to quit all drug use and severely limit his drinking.

And, as fate would have it, a series of events landed me back in my hometown with him. I had just gone through a bad relapse and was moving home to get my feet back under me. Hanging out with Mike was one of the things that helped me through that tough time. We did everything together from golf to the gym to hanging out members of the opposite sex quite often. It was good between us.

Fast forward a few months and Mike and I are renting this huge house in the middle of the city and pumped that we found such a cool spot. But as start getting settled in, he starts to become more depressed. I didn't think anything of it because he has always said that when he stops taking his meds, he goes right into a manic state, never a depressive one. But I would go to work full time and he would sit at home all day and do nothing. His laziness (and the fact that he never cleaned and was an overall slob) started to bother me but I just let it slide because he's my best friend. As a sidenote, his family has TONS of money so he could afford to be unemployed at 26. His family also buys him almost anything he wants so he never necessarily has the motivation to do anything. TBH, I feel bad for his circumstance and how his parents treat him. It's not like they're bad people and they do love him to death, but they continue to coddle him in any way possible (for example, he doesn't do his own laundry; his mom drives to our place and does it for him).

Anyways, about a month ago, he started acting strange. He was up at 6am everyday which NEVER happened before. I decided to confront him as a friend to ask if he was taking his meds. He instantly denied and brushed me off. I confronted him a few days later with another mutual friend of ours and same thing happened. At this point, I felt it was right to call his parents as they should have a right to know that I think their son is sick, especially because they didn't seem him that often. So, one night, he writes me this extremely hate filled later about how big of a piece of **** I was and how I owe him 40,000 dollars (both obviously untrue) and slips it under my door.
When I woke up and read it, I instantly called his dad who then proceeded to get Mike back into a mental facility. This has all transpired in the past two weeks.

So, that's the backstory. Now here's where I need your help. So apparently his parents (who I am close with) have told me that he has a grudge against me and doesn't want to see me. They said that this was part of the illness. Is that something that happens? Irrational grudges? I'm not very well versed in these things. Anyways, he won't talk to me and the doctor's recommended that he lived alone. So, as a favor to him and his family, I moved out of the apartment that I had another 7 months to live in, so that he could live there solo when he gets out of the hospital. Since he's been out, he hasn't reached out to me once to apologize for this insane letter and hasn't tried to even say hi. Furthermore, he got dinner with a mutual friend of ours, and she kinda gave me the scoop on what he said about me during it. Apparently, he thinks I'm a total loser for working full time as a sales and marketing manager for a small company and going to school full time (even though he's never held a serious job in his entire life, literally) . When my mutual confronted him with the idea that he doesn't have a job so he has no room to judge other people, he lied about managing millions of dollars in some portfolio (which is total BS).He also has an idea that I will relapse and die in six months and he firmly believes it. He even bet our mutual friend 100 bucks that I'd be dead in the next 6 months. Mind you, this is all coming from my best friend's mouth. I was hurt to hear all of this and ever since he went to the hospital a few weeks ago, I've been trying everything I can to help him by taking care of his dog, cleaning his room and the house so it will be nice when he moves in, and I even moved out within two weeks because that's what his paretns thought was best even though, legally, I could've been there for the next 7 months because my name was on the lease.

But here are my questions: are the things he's telling my friend how he really feels? Does having a manic episode bring out a side of people where they're unafraid to say how they really feel and maybe this is how he really feels (as in, he despises his "best friend")? It's been 2.5 weeks since he was admitted to the hospital and he's been back on his meds since then obviously but I'm curious how long it might take for him to realize what he's doing. I mean, the kid hasn't even given me an apology for writing a handwritten letter about how ****** of a person I am. Not even an acknowledgment. Basically, have I lost a best friend? I still love and care about the kid but obviously he has a lot of hate in heart. Will it go away?

Thanks for the repsonses and I apologize for the long thread. I just felt like context was needed

Bump Please help

Honestly... I don't know as I can really offer any authoritative advice with regard to your concerns. Perhaps there will be other members, here on PC, who will be able to provide some insight. However since this is your first post here on PC... welcome to PsychCentral. I hope you find PsychCentral to be helpful. Here's a link to an article by PsychCentral's founder & owner, Dr. John Grohol, Psy.D., on the subject of bipolar disorder. The article also provides links to quite a few other articles on the subject. Perhaps some of these articles can be of some help. Good luck.

https://psychcentral.com/disorders/bipolar/

Hi. Welcome to the forum. One thing....He isn't in his 'right' mind. Because of this he feels that he doesn't owe you an apology.

Welcome to PC! You bring up a very good question. I feel, when someone is manic to the point they are delusional, whatever they say isn’t necessarilary how they reall feel at all when back to themselves.

Have his parents told you why he has a grudge against you? Maybe he is resentful of the role you played in his hospitalization. Many manic people do not want to be hospitalized and they can become paranoid of people around them trying to put them away, so to speak. That part about betting $100 that you would be dead in six months is grotesque.

So the resentment, paranoia and dislike could grow for awhile, while the IP experience and loss of freedom is fresh on his mind. I am not saying this is what is going on with him. It is just a guess based on my own experiences.
and he also could just be taking you for granted, independently of bipolar.

He can't really disown his parents since he is financially dependent on them.

As long as he is manic and feeling this way you are likely to get your feelings hurt if you stay emotionally entangled with him. This is about boundaries. I would try to disengage from the situation and give it time. Months not weeks.

Edited to add: I didn't get insight into my manias until months after I was let out of hospital.