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Birdnut123
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Trig Oct 16, 2020 at 12:40 AM
  #1
Hi, posting again in this forum first time since 2012. 🙄. I’ll try and distract you with my own problems. Please feel free to discuss, comment, whatever.

My teen daughter is bipolar and anorexic, and I’m so drained emotionally and physically from having to manage her (there have been 2 suicide attempts and one serious threat of.) She’s in an inpatient center now and we just had our first “family session” over Zoom. It was ok until she told me I’m not allowed to talk to anyone about her issues. I tell only my sister. I have no other fiends that I hang out with, besides my husband. I need to talk about this crap to SOMEONE. I just shut down. There’s no way I’m complying, should I consider this request? I need to talk to someone and it’s not like I’m gossiping over a fence. My conclusion at the moment is that she’s a child, I’m an adult, and she does not dictate to me who I talk to or what I talk about. I just won’t tell her that I talk to my sister anymore.
Am I wrong here?

Last edited by bluekoi; Oct 16, 2020 at 10:56 AM.. Reason: Add trigger icon.
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Default Oct 16, 2020 at 11:55 AM
  #2
I know you are having to deal with a lot. I don't have a answer for whether or not to talk about her. I hope she gets much better.

She needs encouragement and people to believe in her. I have a good friend is bipolar and went through anorexia when she was a teen. She is doing well now as an adult, working on a PHD. She learned how to manage her emotions and she had support from others. I think the thing that made it hard for her along the way was that people saw her as a problem and didn't see the good in her.
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Default Oct 16, 2020 at 02:23 PM
  #3
You have a right to vent to whoever you want. She doesnt need to know about it.

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Default Nov 07, 2020 at 11:05 PM
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Get a therapist to vent to please.

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Default Nov 09, 2020 at 07:22 PM
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I agree that it's essential for you to have your own therapist as a support person. Good luck!

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Default Nov 09, 2020 at 08:06 PM
  #6
She’s trying to dictate what other people can or can’t do. No she needs to focus on herself and change herself and learn she can not control others

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Default Nov 13, 2020 at 01:39 PM
  #7
Quote:
Originally Posted by Birdnut123 View Post
Hi, posting again in this forum first time since 2012. 🙄. I’ll try and distract you with my own problems. Please feel free to discuss, comment, whatever.

My teen daughter is bipolar and anorexic, and I’m so drained emotionally and physically from having to manage her (there have been 2 suicide attempts and one serious threat of.) She’s in an inpatient center now and we just had our first “family session” over Zoom. It was ok until she told me I’m not allowed to talk to anyone about her issues. I tell only my sister. I have no other fiends that I hang out with, besides my husband. I need to talk about this crap to SOMEONE. I just shut down. There’s no way I’m complying, should I consider this request? I need to talk to someone and it’s not like I’m gossiping over a fence. My conclusion at the moment is that she’s a child, I’m an adult, and she does not dictate to me who I talk to or what I talk about. I just won’t tell her that I talk to my sister anymore.
Am I wrong here?
I have a similar situation. I interpret that to mean that I do not talk to mutual friends and acquaintances in order for them to save face. Mental health is a stigma in this country so people try to avoid talking about it till they overcome stigma.

I do talk to their therapist. I also talk about the situation with anonymous support groups and forums (like Psych Central) so I get the support I need. If you want more family support in a Zoom support group setting see Home | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness and click on support.

They have Family to Family programs that teach parents how brain chemistry is the basis of most mental illnesses and also how to cope with situations like you describe.
@CANDC

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