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Old 05-27-2021, 10:05 PM   #1
Bob1960
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Shocked Rude awakening.

By accident over heard my lady friend I'm taking care of say to her sister that I'm a burden because she drives me around everywhere. She has been living with me rent free for over five years. Her Sister and family wouldn't take care of her because of her bipolar. When I moved her in five years ago she was living on the street. Her car I bought for her and gave to her to drive me around because of health problems like going blind in my left eye and Diabetic nerve damage in my feet.

What should I do now? Thanks.
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Old 05-27-2021, 10:17 PM   #2
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Sounds like she might be in denial of the help she’s been gifted. Maybe suggest rent.
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Old 05-27-2021, 10:27 PM   #3
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Wow. Well now you know why she was available as a "roommate"!

I suppose you could worry that she might leave you if she finds a better deal, but i think you could replace her a lot easier than she could replace you. Women outnumber men like ten to one at our age.

She was probably trying to tell her sister that SHE was not the burden, and that her position was secure. Her sister may have been threatening or belittling her.

You two have been together a fairly long time. I guess the question is are you each or both generally happy?
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Old 05-28-2021, 01:18 AM   #4
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Been here lately stressed out because of all the eating out everyday when it hard on my body because of Diabetes. She must eat out everyday she says. Her Blood sugar went up to 1100 her doctor found. But in her mind no big deal. She also wants to die here lately because she must follow a Diabetic diet and won't. Her sister wants her to move in with her so she can control what she eats. Her sister has bipolar also. Sister doesn't take medicine at all for bipolar.
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Old 05-28-2021, 07:07 AM   #5
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Do you watch you tube Collard Valley Cooks? Tammy is starting to change her cooking, from regular southern to more healthy. Last week she made an orange chicken stir-fry.

Most restaurants nowadays have "heart healthy choices" marked on their menus. Maybe you could start choosing your meals from those items, and eventually she will follow your lead. I know how important it is to control your blood sugar. The waitresses should be able to help you.
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Old 05-31-2021, 04:39 PM   #6
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@Bob1960 it sounds like you are vulnerable as far as getting around to appointments. I do not know what to do about your roommate who seems to have self destructive tendencies, but I would start working on Plan B.

PlanB may involve developing relationship with organizations that cater to seniors or people that are visually impaired. If you have a smart phone you may want to consider having apps for ride sharing services in your area.

I think a therapist might help you have another professional opinion if that is possible.

I would see what other options you have for various services like Walmart has food delivery in some areas, Caremark has mail provided meds if needed, and any other things you depend on roommate for. Video medical appointments are very convenient if you have the smart phone or computer necessary to do that and your doctor or hospital has that service.

Hope you find a satisfactory way to navigate this rough patch.
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Old 05-31-2021, 04:44 PM   #7
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Old 06-02-2021, 02:04 AM   #8
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She moving out in 12 days to live with her sister in another state. Her sister can try to get her Diabetes under control now.

Today she ate a whole Banana split and sugar went up over 600.

Thanks for the help.
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Old 06-03-2021, 01:20 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob1960 View Post
By accident over heard my lady friend I'm taking care of say to her sister that I'm a burden because she drives me around everywhere. She has been living with me rent free for over five years. Her Sister and family wouldn't take care of her because of her bipolar. When I moved her in five years ago she was living on the street. Her car I bought for her and gave to her to drive me around because of health problems like going blind in my left eye and Diabetic nerve damage in my feet.

What should I do now? Thanks.

You can either confront her and tell her you were listening to her conversation and heard that, and then find out if it’s true or you can ignore it. Unless it interferes with the relationship that you have and it’s worth damaging that relationship you can just ignore it because people say all sorts of things when they are *****ing and moaning.

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Old 06-03-2021, 01:21 AM   #10
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Overall Bob 1960 it seems like this is entirely too much stress and work for someone who is just a roommate. Even a friend. You are not somebody’s gatekeeper. You are not responsible for somebody else’s bad choices. If this is affecting your health especially get out. Either give her notice to move out or move out yourself.

Whoops I just saw that you said she’s moving out in 12 days.

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Old 06-14-2021, 10:33 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
Overall Bob 1960 it seems like this is entirely too much stress and work for someone who is just a roommate. Even a friend. You are not somebody’s gatekeeper. You are not responsible for somebody else’s bad choices. If this is affecting your health especially get out. Either give her notice to move out or move out yourself.

Whoops I just saw that you said she’s moving out in 12 days.

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She moving out tomorrow which I'm glad and also hate see her leave. She has been eating the wrong foods and making her blood sugar go up to 600 or more a day. I need a long break real bad because of the stress. I'm going to wait three months to find another person to help.

Thanks for all the past help from everyone. Bob
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Old 06-14-2021, 10:53 PM   #12
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Sounds like a good idea. You need a break
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