[ziggy1]

My mothers memory is getting worse,she has become more isolated
she has stopped going to church. She doesn't get out much.

I think she's experiencing early onset of dementia? She says oh
everythings ok. I disagree because I constantly see her pattern
getting worse.

Same questions every 5-10 minutes, things that happened yesterday
asked all over again...drives me insane.

The thing is her and I never had a great relationship in the past
because of abuse issues....my T wants me to move out, lots of
times I have trouble with decision making.

Now i see my Pdoc once a month and my T every week, cuz I been so
stressed out. I'm still dealing with my own issues too.

I know I need to get out more myself, but I have social avoidance
issue's myself. So that doesn't help either. With the higher cost of living and the ecomonomy heading for recession there are
financial issues to.

She needs my income to survive, i could do ok on my own..but if
I move out she'll be kind of screwed.

Hanging in there one minute at a time i guess...any ideas or
comments/suggestions?

thanks
ziggy1

Ziggy
You had said Your Mom has COPD right?
If I am wrong please correct me
If she does call her dr and have her O2 leval checked
plus there is a test they do with blood
"you would think I could remember the tec terms"
but i can not right at this moment.
It has to do with "I think"
Exchanging Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide
When My mom had to much of the carbon her memory was bad
also she would sleep alot
The Dr will know. Threres a machine they can wear at night called Bpap It helps with that......
hopefully i remembered all this right.

As far as you go if you can get more help in there do it....
muffy

[Perna]

How old is your mother? My stepmother started her dimentia when my father died, she seemed fine before but maybe I didn't notice since they were together and I didn't see them much. But she went downhill fast after that.

I hope she just needs her regular doctor; not a whole lot a pdoc or specialist can do, not a whole lot of meds. It isn't like Alzheimer's I don't think. But I'd do like Muffy says and have her regular doc check her out, bloodwork, etc.

Does she have any special friends from church or anything? Maybe they could come over and help you convince her? Any siblings of hers or yours or anything? Maybe her church pastor? It might take someone outside to help "gang up" on her and get her to let you take her.

My husband use to make fun of my stepmother (in a nice way and not in her hearing) because she would literally lose her purse in her chair where she was sitting with it! I got use to the repeated questions; sometimes it was handy if we'd had an argument because I knew how it came out and could change my tactics if we'd gotten into an argument the first time :-)

Good luck, hope you find something that works.

[AAAAA]

My grandmother was like that, and she knew that she was so she'd follow every question with "oh, I just asked you that didn't I" whether she had or not. An attempt to cover her memory loss.

I understand why you want her to see a doctor, sometimes these memory lapses are caused by strokes or CVS's. My grandmother had extensive testing and it was not Ahlezhimer's. But on the other hand there is really nothing that they can do.

She'd make you insane! One time she took money out of the bank to pay a contractor putting a new roof on her house. She "lost" the money several times in the car on the way home from the bank. My mom finally took the money from her in the car, and when they got back to grandma's house, she put the money in the same spot that my grandmother had been hiding money for the last 30 years. She wrote a note by the phone that said "Mom, the money's in the cookie jar (not very creative, but hey...)"

My mom had a social gathering that night and my grandmother called her cell phone (had to look at the note to get the number). All she would say is that it's an emergency and she needed to get over there as soon as possible. Since she'd just went into remission for cancer, naturally my mother assumed grandma's health was at risk, she started bleeding out of her eyes again or some such emergency.

Mom rushed over, heart in her throat and when she got there my grandmother was hysterical. Mom tried to calm her down and find out what was wrong with her. It took her 45 minutes to get herself together enough to tell my mom that she'd lost the money for her roof. After mom recovered from the panic state thinking that Grandma was going to have to go back into the hospital, she asked why she moved it. Grandma replied "I didn't move it, I lost it on the way home." The money was safe and sound in the cookie jar.

I'm sorry for being windy, but I'm familiar with the path that you're on. No matter how much you love her, realize now that you're going to be frustrated and irritated.

I wish you and your mother the very best of luck!

[ziggy1]

My Mom is 82...she has COPD(due to a large mass on left side of lung)...had a breast removed(breast Cancer), then when I was age 9. Then the Cancer returned when I was 15. It was colon Cancer.
They operated and gave her a permanent colostomy. She also has had 3 skin cancer operations through the years mostly on her face.

She survived all of this, without chemo or radiation treatments.
Around 5 years ago she started having breathing problems. They found a mass at the bottom of her lung. This gives her COPD. They
started her on pro-air(Albuterol). She's did well for 2 years. Then was hospitalized for pnemonia in 2005. She just about pulled
through and made a normal recovery. The mass in her lung became
larger, the doctor showed it to me on x-ray.

She came home after she was rehabilitated in a nursing home for 4
weeks. She see's a pulmonologist every 6 months. Last exam showed her Oxygen level just around 89%.

She does sleep alot yes. Her short-term memory is poor. She asks
me same questions every 5-10 minutes. Its amazing though because
she still writes out her own checks for Bills. Maybe because she
been paying same ones for so long?

She does go to church and has a good pastor, who comes by the house and another woman from church comes by to. All her sisters are older, except for one, she is younger but has had her health problems. I am an only child.

So you see I have been worrying and looking after her for many many years. Not so much taking care of her but the worrying has
never stopped. My Dad was a hard worker but he was a very withdrawn Isolated man not a big people person and him and my
mother fought for many years before his death in 1996. So much of
it has fallen on me for a longtime.

There are other things to that I really can't go into right now
but it has caused my mother and I not to get along so well at times. We have been estranged from each other many times through the years.

I have lots of issues also. Different Forum though. The point I'm
making is I guess I'm hanging on by a thread most of the time.
I started going to the church she goes to for more spirtual support and strength.

I think I'm going to share with my doctor about this, and I'll try her primary care physician or pulmonologist first to see what they have to say, thanks to those that responded I appreciate your suggestions and input.

Ziggy1

ziggy
"I think I'm going to share with my doctor about this, and I'll try her primary care physician or pulmonologist first to see what they have to say, thanks to those that responded I appreciate your suggestions and input."

Forsure call your moms Drs
and your Dr for self help and care

Its very hard what your dealing with
tc muffy