[shakespeare47]

I'm involved with a Socrates Cafe, and every week we are asked to discuss a topic. This week's question is what is the importance of personal networks?

Anyone else feel like they don't have any? I do have friends online, but in real life, I don't know of anyone I'd call if I were having troubles. I don't trust many people, and see no reason to include them in my life. I've just been burned too many times.

Can anyone else relate?

Should I feel guilty? Should I try harder? Am I just causing myself unnecessary difficulties?

[healingme4me]

Guilty feelings, perhaps not. Try harder, can't force friendships.

Hard to say about causing unnecessary difficulties. It it good to have an in case of emergency contact. Not everyone is fortunate to have a strong irl network. Many people are fortunate to have family for support, some are not.

[Frankbtl]

Hi shakespeare, so we're saying that your personal network is around friends online?? If that works for you right now then that can be of just as much value as anyone else's.
I'd say that the effectiveness of it matters much more than anything else.
Some people might have 20 people they can call if they need help, but those twenty people might be much less helpful if...........than someone else's much smaller network is for them if.............
So..........your personal network right now to you ...........do you think those friends are supportive, do you think you could open up a little more to them or are you doing that already, do you think that they're able to be there for you enough, do you think there's room/opportunities to extend your list of friends online or are you OK with the friends you have anyway???
Maybe (or maybe not???) you'll decide that your network is effective even if it is online, or that it's effective but you might want to add some more online friends and maybe numbers to the list for just in case e.g. helpline numbers.
But in IRL.........maybe it would be good if you had some people around, even if we're just talking social friendships for now, even if we're just talking about occasional linkups for now/at all, do you think??? Maybe???
But certainly don't feel guilty about the trust issues you have!! There ARE reasons you have those issues, and those reasons are not your fault!! Perhaps keep working on some of those issues with a T and see where it takes you??

Alison