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New Member
Member Since Jan 2005
Posts: 2
19 |
Jan 11, 2005 at 06:40 AM
#1
Hi, I am new to this site and I have been treated for this disorder for 6 months in therapy. I also have borderline behaviours but not the disorder. I have just begun an anti-depressant med because my therapy doesn't seem to be working. I do not feel that I have made any progress in that time, and my therapist is getting frustrated with me as he thinks I am chosing to not to change or work with him. He uses Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, as his main method. I like my therapist and dont want to change. I am wondering if anyone else has had similar problems and if anyone here with avoidant personality disorder has been able to overcome this illness and if so how. thanks
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Veteran Member
Member Since Aug 2004
Location: Michigan
Posts: 449
20 |
Jan 11, 2005 at 12:45 PM
#2
Julies, it sounds as though you are concerned about your progress and that means you are willing to change, I think. Keep us posted.
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Posts: n/a
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Jan 11, 2005 at 06:58 PM
#3
Welcome, Feel free to post questions or just share about your feelings or events. We are here to listen and connect
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Grand Member
Member Since Dec 2003
Posts: 953
20 |
Jan 11, 2005 at 07:12 PM
#4
Avoidant personality disorder means you avoid talking about yourself. Not necessarilly avoid people but you will hide your deep feelings inside you. This is very hard for a person to open up even to therapist as he is just a person in front of you, just like anybody else that you will hide your feelings from. You need to trust this person in front of you. Trust is a big issue for people with APD.
If you have APD you will need to trust first! I wish you good luck with this. And please keep coming here, it helps. hugs! nightdream |
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2003
Location: noplace
Posts: 10,284
21 132 hugs
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Jan 12, 2005 at 05:09 PM
#5
Hi Julies,
Avoidant personality disorder was part of my diagnosis the first time that I got a diagnosis (years and years ago). That T confronted me with things that I couldn't deal with one day, and I ran away from him and never went back. When I got his bill, I looked up my dx in the DSM and found out that quitting therapy is one more thing that is typical of that diagnosis. LOL. Trust has always been difficult for me too, and opening up about personal issues. I spent lots of time in therapy really not going anywhere because I just couldn't say the things that really mattered. APD doesn't mean that you don't want to cooperate or don't want to be social, but fear of rejection is so powerful that we avoid situations where we could be rejected. That really makes it hard to do therapy work, and it's got to be very frustrating for therapists. I think it takes time, and building trust, and it also helped me to write down the things that were too hard to say out loud, and give my T that information in a letter. Once it's out there, then it's easier to talk about it. __________________ “We should always pray for help, but we should always listen for inspiration and impression to proceed in ways different from those we may have thought of.” – John H. Groberg 
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Jan 13, 2005 at 12:55 AM
#6
I second that what Rap says. Writing things down is usually one of the only ways I can tackle the hard issues.
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New Member
Member Since Jan 2005
Posts: 2
19 |
Jan 13, 2005 at 06:53 AM
#7
thank you so much for your support. As for the trust. my trust with my therapist has grown as I have opened up with him more and much of the work that I do with my therapist is either written or by email. He is amazed at the tons of email I do send him. If I didn't write anything or email anything my sessions with him would not have any content. I cannot discuss things with him face to face, but I am comfortable emailing him. at his last visit he read out one of my emails in front of me and I just curled up into the fetal position and I covered my ears so I couldn't hear him. It was after this incident that he expressed his frustration. He always insists that I CAN talk to him like I email and he really wants me to but I dont know how to. Him telling me I can, does not instill confidence in me. It all seems to be just an impossibility. thanks once again.
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Member
Member Since Jan 2005
Location: Washington state
Posts: 39
19 |
Mar 07, 2005 at 07:28 AM
#8
I have the same problem. When there is something that I can't tell someone face to face, I write it down and give it to that person. Trust (or lack of it) is a very big issue with me. It's so much easier for me to write/type something than to say it out loud.
__________________ Linda -- Mommy to 8 parrots, 1 dog and several fish |
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Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2003
Posts: 1,167
21 |
Mar 07, 2005 at 04:46 PM
#9
Hi Jules, and welcome!
I have avoidant personality disorder as well as Borderline Personality Disorder, plus a few other mental illnesses. Sometimes 6 months is not enough to 'fix' the problem, depending on the severity of what you're trying to avoid. I have been with my shrink for 3 years, almost 4, and I still can't tell him the 'details' of my past. I started seeing him because of work problems. He's also int CBT as well as medication (which I'm on). The thing is, I don't believe there's a time limit to 'curing' these things, and even if you want to talk about things and not avoiding anything, you might not able to do that. No matter how much you want to, something inside stops you. Please don't be hard on yourself. You will be able to get past this wall when YOU are ready, not when your brain tells you, or anyone else, for that matter. As for your therapist, please talk to him about not 'pushing'. Like other people have said, writing things down helps. I hope what I've said made sense. Take care. |
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