[Crew]

Lately I have been feeling the shock of fear go throughout my body....

I am trying to post so I thought I would write a bit...

Manly people who bring there babies over, my heart goes blip..blip and nextthing I know I'm hiding. There were no sirens around which usually causes my flight mode to kick in and it is very hard to get my flight back with fight...

does that make sense? IF so, can you give your ideas for it?

thanks for reading ... crew

[Can't Stop Crying]

I wish I knew the answer, just know that you are in my thoughts

[suzzie]

(((((crew))))

[Open Eyes]

Originally Posted by Crew

Lately I have been feeling the shock of fear go throughout my body....

I am trying to post so I thought I would write a bit...

Manly people who bring there babies over, my heart goes blip..blip and nextthing I know I'm hiding. There were no sirens around which usually causes my flight mode to kick in and it is very hard to get my flight back with fight...

does that make sense? IF so, can you give your ideas for it?

thanks for reading ... crew

Well, Im not sure, are you talking about the loss of a child that has memory triggers that set you off?

Ok, you know what triggers are, right? Well, you need to know what your triggers are and then you have to not fight, not flight, but know that it is passed and the trigger is just a memory sparked in your brain reminding you of something disturbing, or traumatic.

When we experience something traumatic, there are often sounds taking place that we are not always aware of. For me one of them was doors, the sound of doors closing. Only, for years, I didn't realize that this sound was a trigger that made me feel anxious/flight and even angry. Then I had a flashback and it was bad. I was running away from someone and I was in a home and this home had many doors. This home had two staircases front of home back of home with many doors and rooms inbetween. I ran away from my abuser thru these doors shutting them behind me to give me time to get away. BUT although I remembered running I did not remember the sounds of the doors slamming. It was only when I experienced the flash back that I could hear the doors and then I made the connection to why I feel jumpy/stressed/anxious/even angry at the sound of doors closing. But now I know what it is so that when I hear a door I can tell myself that I am not running away and I am ok and it is ok to hear a door slam and stay calm. It takes conscious work. But it does help ease.

It is important that when you live thru a traumatic experience, you have to face it. You may need to do this with someone you can feel safe with. But you have to face all of it, including the noises so that you can identify the triggers and only then can you begin to not fight the triggers,
but to recognize them and help your brain be able to hear the sounds and learn that it is not in the present, it has been an event that is over, passed by, passed thru the brain and now needs to be released as no longer a threat. If you have lost a child then your brain must learn that the child is no longer there. You have to learn to look at children and not see what is lost but see other children as a comfort.

Someone told me once that sometimes children do not stay because it is not their time to live a life yet. Sometimes it is a wish from someone who has passed to just go back and see what it is like to be a child that is loved. And this was all they wanted because they had missed that in the life they lived.

We must always realize that there are many things we are not going to understand in our lives. But we cannot let these events destroy us. We must allow our brains to move pass these disturbing events. It is important that you remember that your brain belongs to you. You must care and comfort it. Your brain is your own child that at many times in your life will need comforting. So, you must take the steps toward your own brain to help it pass the events that keep it from growing and living on.

It is not always easy. Depending on the event that caused injury to our brain, it may take time. But we do have to comfort it, otherwise it will cry out all our lives and we will not grow and our brains do deserve to be rested and we must make the effort to let it heal.

we call this surviving. the brain can do this if we let it, help it.