Advice needed

I am a victim of PTSD and the man I recently started dating is also.We both experienced different trauma.He is an ex marine and I am a victim of sexual assault.It's moderate PTSD for the both of us.We can relate because we both are faced with some of the same struggles, but he seems to be having more trouble adjusting to dating me.We actually haven't even established what we are.I tell him we are going with the flow.It's too soon to tell, but he has already twice stated that he is not good with relationships and probably will never be able to give me one.His actions state something totally different.He treats me so well.When we're together it's as if we're in a relationship without the title.I feel he is guarded and this past week was difficult because he brought up the topic again.I told him it was too soon to discuss serious topics and we're still getting to know eachother.I like the pace we are moving at.We give eachother space, but we still spend time together.We got set up by a mutual friend.His best friend in fact and this mutual friend said since we've been seeing eachother he's seen positive changes in him.I feel good as well.I'm comfortable with him and I feel safe.I don't stress and I just want him to relax with me and see where it goes.He's already doubting any chance before it's even begun.I'm patient and understanding already.Any other suggestions?How can I get him to be less guarded.I want to do this right.I want it to be healthy whether it turns into a relationship later or just friends.I am willing to do anything.It's been so long that i've met a sweet man like him.This PTSD is the only thing that is standing in the way, but because I understand and relate it makes it easier for me to communicate with him and see where he's coming from.He gets in these moods where he shuts down and doesn't want to let anyone in.It's happened twice in the month we've been talking.I back off.I let him come to me when he's ready.Is this correct?Should I be doing something else?

I wish you luck in your healing. As for your questions I would go as your own pace and allow your boyfriend to go at his own pace. Just because you both have PTSD and wanting to work together seems dangerous to me because of the fact that PTSD strikes different ppl together. Maybe doing healing as a friendship would help both of you guys. Healing from Tramatic events can be taxing on you much less your boyfriend. Just remember that you are both dealing with different aspects of PTSD and doesn't appear you guys are dealing with the same issues. What does your T say and if you don't have a T, I think that ought to be high on your list to do as well as with your boyfriend needing a T.

Great questions yet I fear I might not have answered them right.

oh btw, to PC I wish for you to find many helpful ppl and friends.
Crew

Thank you so much and I agree.We are definitely dealing with two different aspects of PTSD.I will say this however, since meeting him I feel a lot more calm.He also makes me feel safe and happy.I only hope that I can return this favor to him.I will continue to be patient and understanding because I know that I would want the same in return.I am not seeing a therapist at the moment.The last one I was seeing made some comments that were inappropriate when I met this man a little over a month ago.I had only had 2 sessions with her and a lot of what she did was give me paperwork to read instead of really helping me and talking things through.She also said in the last session when I asked her for advice on my situation was that I shouldn't have met him in person.I should've talked to him on the phone for 3-6 months before seeing him.She continued to say that's what she does.I felt this was inappropriate of her to say.Especially when she threw in my face that the reason I was raped is because I am too trusting.Needless to say the session didn't even last 10 minutes and I got no advice from her.I need to look into seeing someone else, but i'm in the process of switching health insurance so hopefully I can get that taken care of sooner rather than later.I really want to do things right with this man.I don't feel rushed or eager.I'm so content with the pace.I enjoy our time together and the friendship we are building.I know both uf us are guarded and have trust issues, but I think we can help eachother.I know he's helped me.
Hearing different perspectives is so helpful.It's not about knowing the answers so no worries.You were great.Thank you again.