Almost triggered in public...but some how was ok

Hmm so how can I start...first off I am in FL on vacation with my mom, her brother and his wife.

My father who has been struggling with cancer for a while now lives in Daytona beach. Which is only a few hours drive from where we are staying.

My past history with my father is not really perfect. He always cared about me and loved me. I always was aware of that. But he struggled with issues in drinking and probably having a good case of love addiction. Even if he did not aim to he left the impression of being rude, self centered, and selfish toward a lot of people he interacted with.

Due to his military up bring he was quick tempered often with Me as a kid and was often rougher we with me then he should have been. Which left me as a kid nervous to be alone with him. Since it had the feel of walking on egg shells around him.

We all three meet up with him a few days ago for lunch. And we had a good time. Nearing the end of the meal my aunt made the suggestion they would go and take care of some errands and me and my dad could hang out just the two of us. I instantly could tell I was more nervous. And since I was around family I did not feel I could express my nervous ness. To the situation.

In the long run my anxiety was false we had a good time walking up the beach and talking.

It's sad to say but I think living with cancer has changed my dad for the better.

((((kala))))

Sometimes, health crisis', do bring about a change in people, as perspective changes.

Sounds like you were able to get through your anxiety.

Some days just processing through change or triggers are difficult but I know It's worth while