[MissCharlotte]

So this morning I was taking a walk on my favorite counry road, where many people walk & ride their bikes. I was walking in a somewhat isolated part of the road and passed a man walking in the opposite direction. He didn't look like the walker type so my antenna went up....I kept looking over my shoulder to be certain he continued walking away. I felt pretty ok, but then glanced one more time and saw that he had turned around and was now walking in my direction. I freaked out & started walking like a mad-woman, as fast as I could manage. Pulled my earphones out, heart started racing. I called hubby and asked him to meet me, but by then I was sweating and nauseous. I had taken the car so he had to ride my bike down to meet me. While I waited I continued to walk as fast as I could and finally got to an area where there were some houses and I couldn't see the guy anymore.

I realized I was completely re-living an attmpted rape that happened to me in a park when I was 19 years old. When will this terror ever end? I feel like I can't even walk where I want to, 33 years later.......I was completely re-traumatized and in a panic!!

Damn damn damn damn

Sister, I was walking home from work today....I was full of that horrible free floating anxiety...couldn't work out why....just felt like I was about to be attacked...I noticed this guy walking toward me and thought nothing of it...I crossed the rd and then out of the corner of my eye I saw the same guy walking behind me...I could see something in his hands and thought he had a knife...I stopped and pulled out my phone to pretend to use it and allowed the guy to walk ahead of me...I kept looking at his hands and then saw he had 2 cell phones and one of them rang and he started talking...I realised then that he most proberbly had changed direction because he had recieved a call or something...I crossed over and kept my eye on him until I was convinced I wasn't in his awareness like he was mine :-(

Its hard, but its good to be vigilant! you did the right thing!

[(JD)]

((((safe hug)))) That would surely cause such reactions. But I'm glad, in a way, that you did react, respond to your "antennae" because it kept you safe. I hope it won't be such a frenetic reaction next time, but that you find calmer ways to stay safe.

[sabby]

(((((((((((sister & mouse))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry this happened. What a horrible feeling of helplessness I'm sure you felt.

May I make a suggestion to help you regain some confidence and maybe alleviate some of your fears?

How about looking into self protection classes. The ones that teach you how to protect yourselves should you find yourselves being followed or attacked? Having the ability to physically protect yourself and other mental tools to depend on can go a long way in helping you recover from your fears and anxiety. Sort of a "take back your life" deal.

I hope you are both feeling better and more calm now.

xoxoxo
Jean

[MissCharlotte]

Hey thanks to all for your suggestions. Yes, we do still have to listen to, and trust, our innter voice, huh? Self defense classes are a good idea. My husband suggested carrying mace also.

Thanks everybody. Yes, a bit calmer today and able to chuckle about the memory of my husband riding my bicycle down the road to rescue me. Gotta love him....

[heyjoe]

a marine air horn is another good idea to get attention...7 bucks in walmart...not that big at all to carry and light

[MissCharlotte]

Thanks Heyjoe,

Will look into it. Maybe I can use it in chat, too?

Seriously, though thanks for the idea. I need to feel safe and i need to keep walking, not retreating, so I"m going to walmart tomorrow! Can I get mace there? Is it legal in NY? Hmmmm.

:

[heyjoe]

you have to buy mace in new york from either a gun store or a pharmacy that carries it. IM not sure how many do.

A self defense tip. In a bad situation, a key placed between the index and middle finger with the sharp end out makes a great weapon, to the throat or eye. Same for a pen.

((((((((((((((((SISTER)))))))))))))))))))

sending you safe hugs and a big love from england. love you baby

jinny xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

[GYPSYEYES]

{{{{{{{SISSY}}}}}}}

party city also has air horns small enuff to fit in jacket pocket. real thing.

thinking of you

[onebody]

We sell pepper sparay round here as bear spray. Cannister fits on your belt for quick accesss.
I think a major safety weapon is mental. Being able to not show fear. Rather use the adrenaline to power a defense in your body. Muscles become ready, every fiber of your being becomes attuned and ready for action as need be. This also causes you body movements to send out a message of, I am prepared, to the predator. Showing fear unfortunately just encourages an attack.....
My back ground, some of it was spent on the street. You never ever show fear.
And I am a sort that wouldn't hurt a mouse, but because of my street conditioning, when I see fear, even I get tense and physically get a response that there is 'prey' out there.
So as well as physical preparation, mental preparation is huge. I have been in many risky situ., but somehow have managed to fortunately bull my way out of it....or else I got the frickin hugest most diligent guardian angel thats ever lived...
Sorry you have to deal with this %#@&#!, I really am.
Its just not cut and dried, and its gonna take work to get yourself over this. Just buying a can of bearspray is only the beginning....
Take care.
M