[Focus62]

Hi everyone. I'm wondering if anyone here has had a total break with reality due to their PTSD? When I say break with reality, I mean actually acting out in fear toward something, almost like a hallucination. You actually think it is really happening all over again - to the point where you think the people around you are the perpetrators/there to hurt you in some way and you act out toward them - screaming at them, making references to the setting in which the trauma occurred as if you are there right now, things of that nature. I think we all have flashbacks or dissociate where we feel like we are there in our minds but we don't act out towards it... I'm talking about a complete psychotic break with hallucinations or delusions. Has that ever happened to anyone here?

I'm asking because recently I was triggered so badly that this happened to me. I was freaking out to the point where I walked to my counselor's office and sat outside just so I could feel close to someone who I feel cares for me and is someone comforting. She wasn't supposed to know I was there and my plan was not for her to see me - however the place where she can't see me is kind of below her window, blocked by wall between the building and the parking lot...but someone in the office building across from my T's saw me, and I guess I was pacing and just looking distressed to the point where they called the cops to check on me. I don't really recall any of this, all of this I know happened only because my T told me about it - it was like I blacked out in terror. So the cops came and I guess I was yelling at them to stay away from me...I think I caused quite a commotion cause my T actually came outside (remember I was not far from her window) thinking it sounded like me. She told the cops who she was and they allowed her to talk me down and bring me back to reality. Sure she broke confidentiality but it's not like I'm going to fault her for it, she probably kept me from getting tasered or tackled or something by the cops who she said thought I was on drugs! She told me I didn't even know where I was or how old I was. She told me I was afraid of the cops and even her, that I wouldn't let anyone close to me for fear they would hurt me. A break this extreme has never happened to me before - it's scary and I'm pretty mortified by my actions...has anyone else every experienced anything this extreme caused by PTSD alone?

I keep thinking that combat vets might - act out their war-time traumas, but that's only a hunch.

[leomama]

No never had that. What kind of medication are you on?

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Hugs... i empathize with you. I had an experience where i lost touch with reality and to this day i am still trying to absorb it. It is like my mind turned on me. I went through things that triggered it i guess. Fear, anxiety does strange things to the mind. I am saying you are not alone... (((hugs))) I am glad that you are here. This is a safe place

[Out There]

Yes , something similar but I was really stressed as well So I second , not alone , safe here.

[MtnTime2896]

This happened to me really bad one night. I was at a party and I stood up from sitting on the floor. I don't remember what triggered it. All I know is that I woke up in the shower with my fiance trying to get me to calm down and holding me so I wouldn't hit him. I guess I got pretty violent. I don't know where it came from but it was scary as hell. Apparently I was like that for nearly two hours and I have no recollection of anything. That isn't the only time it's happened but it has been the most intense and longest I've had. Those don't come too often but when they do, it seems to come out of no where but I'm also usually really stressed around that time.

[Michalx09]

You're not alone!