PTSD symptoms I have

I'm full of on edge and fear. My body has been shaking a lot lately and suffering with lots of nightmares. One thing I'm noticing is that I don't like jokes or sarcasm around this time cause my abuser used to tease me and make fun of me a lot. Not to long ago he just disappeared on me and never told me that he didn't want to be with me anymore. Just disappeared on me without a trace and I was left wondering what I did wrong.

He was a Narcissistic man and abused me for years, it took me a long time to realize what a fraud he was because he gaslighted me so many times that I was in a state of confusion....

I'm so sensitive and on edge. Full of anxiety and fear someone is out to hurt me and abuse me again. So around this time I try to keep myself busy with hobbies. Anytime my ex boyfriend teased me or made fun of me... he'd tell me to chill out, I'm over reacting and I'm being a drama queen and why I can't let it go when he was straight up abusing me by his words.

Now anytime it happens again, my gut feeling tells me that it's happening again and I end up shaking all over again when I was with my ex boyfriend because my ex was always sarcastic with me and cruel, than tell me he was simply joking and to chill out. He never listened to a word I said, it was always about: him, him, him.

Sorry you are struggling.Have you been diagnosed with PTSD and are you in therapy?If not then that would be a good idea to help you learn to manage your symptoms.