[Open Eyes]

https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/apos...164500553.html

While this article discusses the challenges an individual faced with a partner who was physically and emotionally abusive, there are things shared that can develop in ptsd symptoms that don't have to include physical abuse, but can come from living with someone who for example has a problem with addiction and alcoholism and can be nice and dependable one minute and yet mean and selfish and intrusive the next. It can be an accumulation of "years" in dealing with a partner or even parent that is unpredictable and threatens a person's sense of stability and safety and overall sense of healthy boundaries.

As I read through the highlighted symptoms, while I was not physically abused like this woman, I do suffer from a lot of these symptoms. I have been trying to slowly identify what seems like so many things that can trigger me and all the "years" these triggers evolved to getting to a point where they can create some debilitating symptoms in me. While I have made a lot of gains, I can still struggle even when I don't "consciously" decide to struggle. I am sure others can relate and it's validating to read that "yes" this is a real challenge and the healing definitely takes time and a lot of patience.

[Unrigged64072835]

Yeah, I've been through those things. My last abuser was a landscape foreman, so when the maintenance crew mows the lawns and clears out the grass, I hide. Also from Thanksgiving to the beginning of December I still have anxiety from a previous abusive spouse who died over twenty years ago.

It takes a lot of grounding to keep myself in the present.