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#1
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This past February, I had a breakdown at work (I am a teacher), took a medical leave of absence, was diagnosed with anxiety disorder, prescribed meds, and began to see a therapist. In August, I had another crisis, was hospitalized, and diagnosed as bipolar. I was prescribed meds, and I have continued seeing my therapist (I take Welbutrin SR, Lithium, & Klonopin). Several months ago, I made an offhand comment about how my mother used to beat the crap out of me, and my T asked me about it. I told her I had reconciled myself to it and that my mom and I had made peace before her death 7 years ago. And I honestly believed that. I'm 44 years old--how can something from that long ago effect me? This weekend, however, I saw something on TV that whacked me upside the head and threw me for a loop. I fell to pieces. My husband had no idea what was going on while I was sitting there on the couch sobbing. Sunday night and Monday night I could hardly sleep, and when I did fall asleep, I had horrible nightmares about things my mother had done to me. I could barely function yesterday, so I called my T's office and they were able to switch my appointment to today. I started to tell her about my mom, and then the floodgates opened. I was mad, I was crying--I couldn't believe what was coming out of mouth. She was so great, guiding me along, making me feel safe as I continued and told her things I used to do as a kid as a response to the abuse (I had never told ANYONE about that). Anyway, she added PTSD to my diagnosis and I said "no way." My husband is active duty military, and I am an Army veteran, so I know about PTSD, and I surely didn't think it applied to me. Apparantly it does, though. She told me the more I talk about it the more I will heal, and that if I want to tell her more, or even if I want to go over the same stuff again, the pace is up to me. Because I am new to this, I am reassured by the fact that there is forum for PTSD on this site. Is there anyone else that was made aware of their PTSD by an incident out of the blue like this?
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#2
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>>>>>
Hi there conigogo! Actually your T is correct in saying that the more you talk about it, the more you will heal. It is a process called catharsis or abreaction wherein you are disclosing some of your past experiences - be it good or bad, to your T. I believe that the reason why you are feeling that way is that somehow, you have this hostile feelings towards your mother which was suppressed and needs to let it out. Thereby, allowing you to feel that way. Although you have mentioned that the both of you had already patched things up, it still played a very vital role in which who you are and what you are right now. Just trust your T about this, and eventually, you will subtly notice that you are no longer feeling that way. Keep it up and always be safe... ![]() ![]() ![]()
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![]() conigogo
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#3
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Welcome gogo, I am glad that you had this breakthrough and that you have a good therapist....
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
![]() conigogo
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#4
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Hey. Im glad you found us.
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![]() conigogo
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#5
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I had the same reaction when I was diagnosed w/PTSD&I also told my T a lot of stuff that I'd never told anyone&I've had sporadic mental health care since I was 19. I'm now 40. I'm taking the advices given on some of the responses you recieved to heart as well. Unfortunately, until you get this out of your system&it's not quick or easy, you may find yourself having trouble in personal relationships. Family, friends, partners,kids,etc. If you're relating to no longer relating your usual way towards others, please PM me&I'll give you a book-that I'm not currently near-that could be of help. It's about imperfect relationships&the things we do to sabotage them subconsciously. The author doesn't state PTSD as a possible cause outright, but many of the exampled behaviors are the same as those w/PTSD.
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I am a 39 year old female that is diagnosed with bipolar disorder,anxiety disorder and post traumatic stress syndome. I'm on disability and often have no one to talk to when I'm not feeling so good. So please contact me if you'd like to talk or share or vent. I'm listening! |
![]() conigogo
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#6
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Quote:
the people in this community are so caring and good. You have found a lot of great new friends here. ![]() |
#7
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I also got diagnosed "out of the blue" (or so it seemed to me). I sought therapy to deal with grief and depression after the death of a parent, and when we started discussing my family, all the physical abuse came out. It changed my life to be able to understand why a lot of the things I have seen as "weird behaviors" are related to a clear cause in my past. I don't feel crazy anymore.
Dealing with this with a great T can make such a difference in your life. It's hard, but I encourage you to persist. |
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