[pinkbutterfly]

Long story short...I am not doing well.
Last saw him in June -- he started me on a new med - Wellbutrin 100mg/day and said it was a low starting dose. My next appt they scheduled me for was Sept 6 -- sucky place because even today when I called their next available was for November...which means when I go in, my NEXT appt will be even further out.

One...I need more frequent appts while trying to get meds right...don't you think?
Two...my meds aren't helping...on 100mg Pristiq, and 100mg Wellbutrin (plus PRN Ativan 1mg for anxiety). Depression is a lot worse, suicidal thoughts have become worse as well. And my ED stuff is out of control. My T almost didn't let me leave after the appt yesterday -- she wanted me to go IP, but I promised I would call to see if I could get something sooner. Well I called first thing this morning, and they have a walk-in clinic today at 2pm...my case manager said to be there by 1:30...I will be there by 1:15.

I'm so nervous...I don't know what he will say/do. It's actually a new psychiatrist at this clinic, so I don't know him at all. The previous psychiatrist was really nice and talked to me for well over an hour (a nurse came in at one point and told him he had other patients waiting lol).

Anyway, I know the meds are not where they should be. I don't know what I need...maybe a little encouragement...I am so incredibly anxious about this appointment...first...will I get in (the first five on the list will be seen)...and what will the result be? I'm terrified that he will see my history of hosptialzations and overdoses and think - let's put her in. It's not what I need. yes, I need more than I am getting currently, but it's not being IP back at that hospital...that's NOT what I need.

[gayleggg]

Good luck on getting in. Hope he can adjust your meds to where you are in a better place.
Gayle

[pinkbutterfly]

thanks so much

[ShaggyChic_1201]

How did appointment go?

[pinkbutterfly]

didn't get in with doc. i got there earlier than she said to and they were already full. i broke down in tears right there. Almost hysterical tears. my case manager was standing right there (who I told on the phone that i was not ok earlier that morning) -- yet she said absolutely nothing to me when I walked out the door. Nothing.

finally i decided that i am just going to increase my dosage of my medication, cuz it's what the doc would do. i have enough to do so in order to get to my next appt of Sept 6. in the meantime i am looking for another psychiatrist that I can see more than every 3-4 months.

[ShaggyChic_1201]

Oh Pink, that's awful. How cold and inconsiderate of the case manager. I wouldn't ignore a stranger who was in distress such as you described, so it really shocks and stuns me that the CM would do that.

Which med are you upping? I know several people have posted that 100 mg is the highest dose of Pristiq, but I've been on 200 mg for 2.5 years b/c it didn't do any good at lower doses.

Please take care of yourself! If you're feeling as if you're a danger to yourself, please call a hotline and/or go to the ER. We want to have you safe and posting your improvements for a long time.

Thinking of you,
Bub

[pinkbutterfly]

Thanks. I'm going to increase the Wellbutrin. Normal dose is typically 300mg. I'm on100mg.

Thanks for thinking of me