[MisterUnderstood]

I've been on Wellbutrin for close to 7 months now, originally on 200 mg, but now on 150. It usually makes me extremely sociable. It gives me the energy to get out of bed, it lets me talk to people, and it generally makes me feel extremely happy. But as of lately, I keep getting episodes of breakthrough depression. I honestly go from pretty much extremely happy to suicidal in 5 minutes if something goes wrong. I would increase my Wellbutrin because maybe I've developed a tolerance, but I've tried taking 300 mg. I get extremely irritable and violent, and I don't think I can tolerate it.. The past two days, when I've gotten this feeling, I've usually taken 75 mg of Ultram, and it helps me pretty well. But 1) I'm afraid of becoming physically dependent on it, and 2) It's not actually my prescription, and I have no psychiatrist at the moment, so no matter how much it helps me, there's zero chance of me being prescribed it as an antidepressant :/ Is it normal to get so down on an antidepressant..? I hate feeling like this.. I wanna be happy, but it's like life won't let me. Do you guys think that it's maybe not enough Wellbutrin to keep me from becoming down, or are my expectations too high for this medication, thinking it'll keep me happy all the time? I know it's normal for everyone to get sad, but it's too much.. I honestly can't deal with it.. Thank you.

[ChangingMyMind]

Well I can't speak for welbutrin because I haven't taken it past a few days (rash), but I have been happy without any depression on Celexa. I would go years without any sliver of depression on Celexa and I took it for 11 years so I know it's possible. I only needed to increase the Celexa 2-3 times total over the 11 years and even then I was able to reduce the dose when I felt better. I hope that helps somewhat.

[MisterUnderstood]

I've been on Lexapro before, but only for a month or so. It made me get violent and irritable. So I'm not allowed on Zoloft or Prozac or any of those. They labeled me bipolar. But yet, they refuse to diagnose me as bipolar and refuse to consider a mood stabilizer. I know if I up the dose, I'll probably stop being as irritable in about a week or two, but if it doesn't help, then it'll have been a waste. Honestly though, the tramadol makes me feel a lot less depressed, and I'd figure it should make me get violent because it works on serotonin. But maybe it's because it's a weak opioid. I don't know tbh.

[Altered Moment]

It is all to common for them to stop working. At least for many of us. I have experienced the same thing recently with Fetzima. Worked like a miracle since April but I will still get these three day pretty bad mini depressions. I am in one now that has lasted longer and seems to be getting worse. I came real close to calling today to up the dose as my pdoc just said I could if I wanted. I can make three more jumps up but of course that may mean side effects I haven't had so far.

We call it pooping out. I have had many poop on me and none has worked as good as this one. I am considered treatment resistant though.

Can you try 200? You should have a pdoc. Have you had experience with other ones before this?

I am gonna try to get as many miles as I can on this Fetzima thing since it has worked so good which is why I am hesitant to up the dose right now but I may have to.

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[Altered Moment]

And yeah ultram is not a great idea even though it is very effective and you are right you won't get it prescribed for depression.

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[Altered Moment]

I was gonna suggest a mood stabilizer like lamictal and the just read your other post. Why would they refuse? Lamictal is also used as an augmenter to the anti depressant for depression. If you don't have a pdoc get a good one.

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[MisterUnderstood]

The issue is that I prefer the Wellbutrin XL to the SR because it keeps me more stable, and the XL doesn't come in a 200 mg pill. I wanna say it comes in 100, 150, and 300. Plus I just got a 3 month's supply of the Wellbutrin today so… And he wouldn't allow me on Lamictal because he was worried I'd increase the dose too fast, which might give me Stevens-Johnson Syndrome. I'd love to try Abilify, because it can augment an antidepressant AND it's only a partial antagonist, so it wouldn't completely offset Wellbutrin's dopamine action. But I probably can't get an appointment with a psychiatrist until late September, and my pdoc is averse to prescribing psychiatric meds, so I couldn't get a prescription from her either.

[Altered Moment]

Well the rash thing is pretty rare with lamictal and why couldn't you go up slow? I believe I went from 50 to 100 in a week and he just warned me to watch out for the rash. Yeah abilify is an option. I was on it for a year but it didn't do much good or bad. Maybe you have to ride it out at 150 for awhile until you can see a psychiatrist (pdoc). I am sure no one wants to see you get violent.

Be careful with the Tramadol.

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[ChangingMyMind]

Yes, that is a good point zinco. I forget sometimes that I am abnormal I have not experienced poop out yet, just added side effects over the years on the same freakin dose of the same freakin drug. Sigh... I am curious what the longest run somebody can have... I was convinced I would be on Celexa forever... Too bad these drugs don't hold up very well for some of us.

Mister, it is weird they won't give you an AP, my pdoc was pretty much throwing APs at me when the ADs didn't help and I only have a diagnosis of depression. No signs of BP, sometimes I wish I could be manic to get out of this stinkin depression.

[MisterUnderstood]

He viewed me as a drug addict because of the Borderline. And tbh… The first visit, I was clean about how I'd used Xanax and Valium before to help me relax. I was responsible and didn't take them more than once a week, but I guess since it wasn't my prescription, that's viewed as at risk for drug addiction. But really, I'm responsible. I was on Vicodin for my wisdom teeth, and I had 20. I took them for 3 days and even though I was still in pain, I switched to Tylenol. So I'm not an addict. And Changing, he didn't want to because the typicals are associated with TD and akathisia and all that, and the atypicals are associated with massive weight gain, aside from Abilify, which is mostly weight neutral. He said Seroquel might help me, but refused to prescribe it.

[Altered Moment]

ChangingMyMind I don't think you any more abby normal than the rest of us. We are all just different.

Mister your doc seems very med adverse. Maybe not a good match if you are willing to take some risks with them if they help. I am a recovering addict and my pdoc finally gave me klonopin, a benzo. The anxiety and paranoia that came with it was so bad I was gonna off myself and nothing else worked. I take it as prescribed and no more and it has worked like a miracle. I know the possible drawbacks.

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[ChangingMyMind]

Originally Posted by zinco14532323

ChangingMyMind I don't think you any more abby normal than the rest of us. We are all just different.

Mister your doc seems very med adverse. Maybe not a good match if you are willing to take some risks with them if they help. I am a recovering addict and my pdoc finally gave me klonopin, a benzo. The anxiety and paranoia that came with it was so bad I was gonna off myself and nothing else worked. I take it as prescribed and no more and it has worked like a miracle. I know the possible drawbacks.

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What kind of paranoia did you have, about what kind of things? I am curious if I use be paranoid.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by ChangingMyMind

What kind of paranoia did you have, about what kind of things? I am curious if I use be paranoid.

It was when I was in the lowest of depression and I would get horrible anxiety as well. At best it was an undefinable sense if impending doom. At worst it was thinking that every car that went by was the cops coming to get me. Or that I was going to prison because I owe the IRS some money. Some very small grain of legitimate worry ballooned into totally irrational obsessive thinking. I couldn't shut it off. I can't say for sure if the anxiety caused it or it caused the anxiety. I think I get some border line psychotic features when very deeply depressed. The thing is, not this summer but last summer, when I was not depressed I would still get the anxiety with paranoia but the paranoia wasn't as bad. This is all before klonopin. I know the dangers of klonopin but it has taken it away. I still get some mild anxiety but not often and not bad.

I say I was gonna off myself because the anxiety and paranoia is a new feature of my mental illness in the last five years. Depression I am used to and can handle but not that.

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[MisterUnderstood]

I have very, very mild paranoia. If you could call it that. It's more of a sense of mistrust though. Partner infidelity and a general distrust of others' motives. I think when I was on Zyprexa, it got a little better, but that drug seriously messed with my head.

[vans1974]

Originally Posted by MisterUnderstood

I've been on Wellbutrin for close to 7 months now, originally on 200 mg, but now on 150. It usually makes me extremely sociable. It gives me the energy to get out of bed, it lets me talk to people, and it generally makes me feel extremely happy. But as of lately, I keep getting episodes of breakthrough depression. I honestly go from pretty much extremely happy to suicidal in 5 minutes if something goes wrong. I would increase my Wellbutrin because maybe I've developed a tolerance, but I've tried taking 300 mg. I get extremely irritable and violent, and I don't think I can tolerate it.. The past two days, when I've gotten this feeling, I've usually taken 75 mg of Ultram, and it helps me pretty well. But 1) I'm afraid of becoming physically dependent on it, and 2) It's not actually my prescription, and I have no psychiatrist at the moment, so no matter how much it helps me, there's zero chance of me being prescribed it as an antidepressant :/ Is it normal to get so down on an antidepressant..? I hate feeling like this.. I wanna be happy, but it's like life won't let me. Do you guys think that it's maybe not enough Wellbutrin to keep me from becoming down, or are my expectations too high for this medication, thinking it'll keep me happy all the time? I know it's normal for everyone to get sad, but it's too much.. I honestly can't deal with it.. Thank you.

Sorry to hear, but Wellbutrin is great, but can cause irritibility and agression. So, for me I like Brintellix, Fetzima or Nefazodone for an AD. Also, Vistaril does nothing for me for anxiety, but makes me tired, so I like the benzos or Buspar. Best of luck!

[MisterUnderstood]

Brintellix seems too new, so it'd more than likely be costly. I've heard good things about Fetzima, but I honestly have no clue what it is. And Nefazodone also sounded good, but I don't even know if they still prescribe it in the US after those couple of organ shutdowns it caused. And yeah, I really hate the Vistaril. It's honestly less powerful than Benadryl, but my doc wouldn't give me anything stronger, and I have little desire to try buspirone. I've heard some people call it amazing and that it pretty much completely gets rid of their anxiety, but others have said that it's basically a placebo and it doesn't work. I told my doc that my last visit (about 2 months ago), and he goes, condescendingly, "Well, how would you know? Have you tried it? No? Then it might have a different effect on you." I called him a "greedy bastard" and told him I'd go find another psychiatrist. No such luck a haha.

[Altered Moment]

Vistaril is useless.

I have had very good luck with Fetzima so far. It is an SSNRI

Buspar might be worth a try. I dunno why mine didn't make me try it. I haven't heard of it being that effective. Maybe that is why.

Nefazodone is available in generic in the US from what I understand.

[MisterUnderstood]

Well, I can't really afford meds like Fetzima and Brintellix, and I don't have a doc to prescribe BuSpar or nefazodone, so I think tomorrow I'm gonna increase my Wellbutrin to 300 mg and hopefully I can find a doctor to write a new prescription when I run out. If not, well... That might be an issue. But I have an appointment with my T on the 6th, and he'll be able to help me.