[harmonyinheart]

This is a post I originally put on the bipolar forum, but maybe I should have posted here. Really looking for some more help

Originally Posted by harmonyinheart

My psychiatrist of 2 1/2 years said to me yesterday that he doesn't know if he can do anything else for me. I'm am super-sensitive to meds (have tried and failed with so many) and I have been undergoing ECT with him since February (maintenance treatments these past four months). This is also following two different medication trials over the past seven weeks- the last a TCA I used to be able to tolerate but this time made me wicked tweaked out and like I was on some really bad speed.
He said he doesn't see a clear picture of recovery and what works for me. He said it may be time to have another set of eyes take a look, I.e. Another psychiatrist. I said even if i wanted to get a second set of eyes, psychiatrists are so scarce how would I even get into see one? ( there are people I know who have been on waiting lists for 9+ months to see a psychiatrist)

Then he said about a referral for CSP services, and I can have coordinated care and counseling services and access to DBT groups, etc. not really addressing the question about finding a new doctor.
this discussion took place just before I was put out for my ECT. He mentioned it to my mother as well, and she asked " would she still be able to see you?" He said "it's possible."

This made me feel like real s?!$.
I said to him that I was in a much better place now than 9 months ago-I bottomed out with my BP depression and we began then ECT. Took awhile but it saved my life. I've told him this before.
He has said there usually is more consistency with the maintenance treatments.
I get that a lot "usually " statements. I have a complex mental illness profile, so I "usually " don't fit into the "usual".
This dr. Is considered to be too notch in psychiatry around here and I don't want to start with a new doctor or new counselor. **

I don't know what I am really looking for here. Any support would be welcome. I fear being passed off and having to start over with a new doctor. And my ECTS- not a lot of people qualified to perform them. He is one of very few where I live and they saved my life I do not want to give them up.
It's just, I feel so hopeless about everything now. What am I going to do?!
The uncertainty of everything is really killing me to.


**I just began with my current therapist five weeks ago- had to change because my previous therapist was not helpful and I didn't feel he had my best interests in mind at all; before that my insurance changed and I had to stop seeing a wonderful therapist, before that another therapist that wasn't fit to help with what I deal with , and then a therapist was fired and then another before that got a new job and before that it was yet another insurance issue. I've been through so many, my doctor has even said I need consistency in this respect. And my new therapist is intelligent, has experience with my illnesses and I can tell she genuinely cares. END OF RANT just really upsets me

[Travelinglady]

I'm sad you're going through this problem with meds. Maybe if you share your concerns about seeing a new psychiatrist with your current one, then you can get referred, instead of having to search for one yourself. At least he's honest and not trying to just take your money for not helping. He can't say he's positive something will work since there are no 100% guarantees with any treatment!

I don't know much about ECT, but I think maintenance treatments are what's done after the "official" treatments. Maybe he can help you with that, anyway. I'm glad they have helped.

At any rate, it won't hurt to tell him the worries you've shared with us! Let us know what he says. Okay?

[*Laurie*]

Hi harmony, Exactly what kind of help are you looking for? I mean, help that's different from the replies on the Bipolar board.

Hi Harmony, if you don't want to switch doctors and think you are doing better than before, tell him what you told us. I'm sorry he said that to you. I would be frustrated too. Talk to him.

[harmonyinheart]

Originally Posted by *Laurie*

Hi harmony, Exactly what kind of help are you looking for? I mean, help that's different from the replies on the Bipolar board.

I guess I am also wondering if others have been in a similar position. I am just so perplexed by this and worried I don't even know what I need. I see my psychiatrist today. Hopefully it ends up well

[*Laurie*]

I haven't had a pdoc actually come out and say, "I don't know what I can do for you anymore," but I've had a few of them say it in so many words. Frankly, while I understand the frustration a doctor might feel when no treatment is working, if I have a pdoc who indicates that s/he has no more ideas for treatment, I'm inclined to find a different pdoc. I mean, I'm not giving up on myself...why should the pdoc give up on me?

I hope your appointment goes well today. Let us know.

[harmonyinheart]

Well I have seen my psychiatrist twice since this first was brought up. The first meeting was difficult and I felt that he misunderstood a lot of what has been happening he last 2.5 years that I've beeen seeing him. However, I saw him yesterday and it went better. I told him I needed to be less passive, take advantage of he times when my symptoms aren't severe and just push through. Because there will always likely be symptoms I have to just live with them. I told him I need to do more, get a job and finally get out of my house, part time work in conjunction with my disability income will be enough to survive on my own. And I made it clear, or at least I hope I did, that significant progress has been made since I began seeing him (I won't site all th examples I gave) and that I would have left long ago had I thought it would be any other way, had I thought progress was out of reach with him.
I also said that about late 2009 until early 2011 I went through a period where after a significant bipolar episode I just let the depression envelope me and I didn't take action. I, like the past few months, just became enervated by all the symptoms. 9 months, 20 months, even 5 or 6, I wouldn't have been able to carry out a job. But the last few months I should have been. So that is my plan. Get a job, be less passive, get my ED under control and continue with my doctor and my therapist. I told him I would meet with my county health and human services dept still, to see if they would be a worthwhile resource. That is next week. I told him I was leaning towards not going that route, but I would check it out nonetheless.

Thanks everyone for your support.

[TicTacGo]

I agree with Laurie's post. You are not going to give up that easily, so find someone who is willing to see it through.

[ilive4music]

Originally Posted by *Laurie*

I haven't had a pdoc actually come out and say, "I don't know what I can do for you anymore," but I've had a few of them say it in so many words. Frankly, while I understand the frustration a doctor might feel when no treatment is working, if I have a pdoc who indicates that s/he has no more ideas for treatment, I'm inclined to find a different pdoc. I mean, I'm not giving up on myself...why should the pdoc give up on me?

I hope your appointment goes well today. Let us know.

I agree with you but I've had like about 3 different doctors say that to me. So I guess it's safe to say I'm a lost cause. Good luck...

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by ilive4music

I agree with you but I've had like about 3 different doctors say that to me. So I guess it's safe to say I'm a lost cause. Good luck...

I've had at least 3 pdocs indicate it to me. One was downright mean. I figure that they're not very creative thinkers and/or are burned out.

[Shazerac]

It must hurt to have a doc tell you that. But it sounds like it led you to try to make some changes in how your handling your recovery good luck.

Personally I wouldn't like being told that either, but I would prefer the doc be honest. Then I can move on and find someone who can help me, instead of wasting my time beating a dead horse.