The stuff my therapy is about lately is important, but it seems not as important as working on my trauma stuff and I am wondering why it seems like she is the one holding back. Things feel too friendly and I want to get down to business. She had to cancel one appointment for a out of town emergency but this month seems to be "too" easy.

Now I feel sort of weird at going in tomorrow to see her, I don't want to talk about fluff. I need more .

Maybe she is trying to get me more stabilized or something? But it has been like this all month. I just want to get this trauma stuff over with so my brain can be normal again. Anything else seems like watered down therapy right now. Just desensitize me and let me get on with life normally. In the past, I am the one who is holding back, now I am the one pulling the horns and wanting to get on with it.

Therapy feels so complicated.

[billieJ]

Dive right into it, exotic! She'll have to respond. I just learned that my new pdoc - the only one in town, is going to be someone I formerly worked with for 17 years. Ohhhhhh, boy. Tell your T, "this is what I want to talk about today." I know how easy it is just to let therapy be friendly. But it's not necessarily that productive. billieJ

[sittingatwatersedge]

Exotic, iit's said that we guide our own therapy (in a sense we do). Yr T may be waiting for you to bring it up, either because you want to & are ready, or because you need to & have got your courage up. Sounds like you are in one of those two places, you might bring it up yourself and see what she thinks about it?

Exotic

You're driving the bus along this road - it's totally up to you which way you want to go! If you want to deal with the trauma, tell T that. Good luck!

Thanks you all!

It if funny because now that the day is here I feel like such a chicken ****! lol

I sure am difficult I guess. lol

[darkrunner]

(((((((((((Flower!!)))))))))))))

You're not difficult!! I think it's pretty normal to be ambivalent about bringing up difficult topics in therapy.

I think the others are right - your T is probably waiting for you to take the lead so that she can be sure you are ready and comfortable with the deeper topics. Don't rush yourself though! You'll know when you're ready. Let us know how it goes tomorrow!

LOL, Well I did tell her, it was maybe in the minute past the time my session was up. We had a good session and was discussing so much and then when the time was up and I went to stand up and I just said I felt frustrated about something. I said I hope you don't take this wrong, but it feels like therapy is being watered down, that she is usually more "on it" and when are we going to get back to the EMDR? lol She was SO happy I said that and thought it was good. She was going easy on me since I was having trouble with classes at school because of my memory problems. But she told me what to work on till Tues when I see her and we will "get on it" lol.

On a side note though I talked about how scared I was of this flu going around because me and my kids have asthma and my son woke up with a sore throat and how 1/3 of the students in my classes are missing, even profs. Then she told me that her husband had it and it lasted 2 1/2 weeks and he is never sick. Well I was thinking that, okay, that would mean she is probably going to get it now, any time now.

Midterms are next week and I sure hope I don't get sick! Normally I don't get too upset about stuff like this, but that flu seems to be killing a lot more people than the regular flu, one kid at my school died from it because he had asthma too. IT IS SCARY STUFF!

exotic

I'm so glad you told your T, and I love her reaction - yay! Now you will get what you need, how great is that!

I hope you and your family, and your T, all stay healthy!

[peaches100]

Exoticflower,

I'm glad you spoke up with your t and told her that you need more substance to your sessions. That takes bravery! It sounds like your t really welcomes feedback too, which is really nice to know. That way, you can keep open communication with her.

[Tapestry]

On a side note though I talked about how scared I was of this flu going around because me and my kids have asthma and my son woke up with a sore throat and how 1/3 of the students in my classes are missing, even profs. Then she told me that her husband had it and it lasted 2 1/2 weeks and he is never sick. Well I was thinking that, okay, that would mean she is probably going to get it now, any time now.

Midterms are next week and I sure hope I don't get sick! Normally I don't get too upset about stuff like this, but that flu seems to be killing a lot more people than the regular flu, one kid at my school died from it because he had asthma too. IT IS SCARY STUFF![/quote]

Exotic - That is so very sad that one kid died from H1N1 (swine flu) and you are right that your son is at higher risk because of asthma. But swine flu is no more deadly, even for asthmatics, than regular seasonal flu. The main difference with swine flu is that it spreads more quickly than seasonal flu, because it is a "new" virus and there is little resistance in the community. So more people can get H1N1 in a relatively short period of time. That is why it is considered pandemic - it is occurring simultaneously in many parts of the world - unlike seasonal flu.

In my area (East Coast), several strains of flu are going around right now, and most people are getting one thing or the other. Absenteeism at school and work is very high right now from various viruses. I have asthma too and am recovering from the flu - not sure which one. I did need to increase my asthma meds and use a nebulizer once, but that happens to me with most respiratory viruses, flu or not. Basically, it's just a good time of year to take usual flu precautions anyway.

This is meant to be reassuring - sounds like you have enough on your plate without being worried to death about swine flu...

Thanks Tapestry! I love your name and welcome to PC! :-)

It seems like my son has only a cold I think. Whew! I got my flu shot today when I saw my doctor. The H1N1 shots won't be available till Nov. at my school, but it seems like it will be a little late since so many people actually have it now. I too, have a nebulizer, so happy for that, got my Allbuteral filled for that too today. I am all set! One good thing for all the panic on the news is my kids are actually WILLING and BEGGING to get their shots this year!

[Tapestry]

I happened to read in the paper today that another real difference between H1N1 and seasonal flu is that H1N1 can infect lower in lungs, which can lead to a higher incidence of viral pneumonia. The numbers of people who get this complication are still small but this is what can strike young, healthy adults and lead to a more serious outcome with H1N1 than usually occurs with seasonal flu. But you are clearly experienced enough with asthma that you wouldn't wait long to respond to respiratory infection. You might want to ask your son's dr for more specific advice as to when he would want you to seek treatment if your son might be coming down with H1N1.

I don't mean to heighten your anxieties again, but the compulsive part of me has to add this

And thanks for the warm welcome