[mixedup_emotions]

It was miserable having to get a shower and go out the front door. I didn't want a neighbor stopping to talk to me...and one did, briefly.

I told T that he was the last person I wanted to see... ...and that I was angry that I had to come in today because that meant getting out of bed.

We talked a lot about the withdrawal....my work issues...my unrelenting, unpredictable ex....and how I'm not coping...

He wants me to consider short term disability, and looking for another job - since he predicts that I won't be there much longer anyway.

I don't know.

I told him I wanted to go home and go back to bed. He told me that he didn't want me to do that. He wants me to go out and do something to enjoy myself. I do have plans tonight to go on a paranormal investigation, but I am not really feeling up to it. We'll see. I know it'd be good for me....but my bed is more appealing at the moment.

*sigh*

Well, at least I made it to see T.....that, I guess, is progress....even though I don't feel any better....

[darkrunner]

Good for you for going to the appointment. Maybe it seems useless, but it's all about baby steps.
It sounds like you talked about some good options for moving forward and that is a good thing. To think of future possibilities might help you hold on to some hope that you will get through this.
And you *will* get through all of this.

paranormal investigation??? - sounds interesting! Why don't you go and report back what it was like. I'd be interested to hear more.

[WePow]

MU - actually, the act of going to see T is indeed something you should feel very proud of yourself for doing!!!! Way to go!!!!!

[Christina86]

Good for you for going! T is probably right, better to get out then to stay in bed. I'm going out tonight to a movie with a friend and her younger sisters, although I'd rather stay in bed all day (again...)

I don't know anything about being on disability (although I do get disability, but I'm in Canada so I'm betting it's different) but if your job isn't making you happy, then do find something else. You deserve to be happy!

[zooropa]

I'm glad you went, MUE, and I know how hard it was. Just getting there was the point, and it's great that you told him how you felt about it and everything that's going on. Great job!