[Melbadaze]

ok now I have that tune firmly lodged in my head, why? Because last week when talking about javing compassion for myself I told T that that was like asking me to go outside and speak Italian (ok no good songs spring to mind regaRding Italian ). T replied, oh I'm sure if you were in Italy long enought you'd begin to pick some italian up.

ThIs conversation springs to mind because my old tapes are playing but some new tapes are responding to them and it does Feel like a new language and I feel inbetween them, the old tapes are playing and I'm just about to emtionally respond to them, ie, self hatred or get depressed etc and suddenly I can't because the new tape takes Over and I actually feel I'm in session with T When she confronts my Stuff with new messages and I feel like I dunno what do exactly right now, not sure what to do with the space my not reacting with negativeity normally fills, it does feel just like "I'm turning japanese yes I'm turning japanese I really think so",oh but perhaps thata just an english pop song?

[WikidPissah]

lol...not sure if you know the exact meaning of that song! Maybe look it up and you'll get my giggle.

Anyways...it definitely is like learning another language.

[Melbadaze]

ooolala!! LOL!

[Elana05]

Yeah... learning a new language. I know what you mean. My responses have always been purely automatic: ie. this means this and that means that.
But recently I told T how I've been (sometimes) trying to catch myself before the automatic response. I said it was like... getting up, walking over to the "big tomb of new responses from T," opening it up, flipping to the right page, finding something possibly more helpful, thinking about implementing it, thinking about how it sounds (odd, like a new language), giving it a go.
Man, it takes forever. But it is most often so worth it.

Elana

[Perna]

O sole mio
sta 'nfronte a te!

That's great that the T tapes take over now. The in-between space is a little confusing, uncomfortable, and scary and it does sort of remind me of taking French in school and accidentally saying something in French without thinking about it and then realizing you were speaking French instead of English (or dreaming in another language?).

[Onward2wards]

I'm going through the same thing, Melbadaze ... trying to overwrite old tapes with new tapes. Good stuff, but sometimes disorientating. It sometimes feels like meeting my self after a long absence, and things have changed, if that makes any sense. Kudos to you on your positive growth.

[Melbadaze]

Originally Posted by Onward2wards

I'm going through the same thing, Melbadaze ... trying to overwrite old tapes with new tapes. Good stuff, but sometimes disorientating. It sometimes feels like meeting my self after a long absence, and things have changed, if that makes any sense. Kudos to you on your positive growth.

oh yes makes complete sense!

[BlackCanary]

Originally Posted by Melbadaze

...last week when talking about having compassion for myself I told T that that was like asking me to go outside and speak Italian (ok no good songs spring to mind regaRding Italian ). T replied, oh I'm sure if you were in Italy long enought you'd begin to pick some italian up.

1) thanks for getting that song stuck in my head, and now the meaning that I never knew!!!!!!!
2) I feel the same way when the T says "You have to learn to love yourself". I asked "Um, what does that feel like? Do you love yourself? How do you know if you love yourself?"
It truly could be in another language, I simply have no way to see or understand this concept.
I have to admit that I responded with that line from Seinfeld about being master of my own domain....

[sunrise]

Ha ha I used to really love that song, and I did know the meaning, so I was very surprised when I read the title of your thread, Melba! Now I need to go download that song so I can listen to it properly. The real tape is bound to be much better than the tape in my head.

My T used to say stuff to my XH and I in couples therapy that were of the "new tape" variety and what he said seemed really really alien. His approach was just to keep repeating it enough until we at least partly internalized it. (Akin to brainwashing?)