[cmac13]

I have come to accept the fact that therapists are not perfect. They may not always use the words/interpretations we want to hear but in general most do not intentionally hurt our feelings. I have come know my therapist as the person she is and for me she is "good enough". I love her for all she does for me and I accept the mistakes along the way. That's just how relationships are in real life and in therapeutic relationships. We have to learn to deal with therapists being human and subject to error. My session yesterday left me realizing how wonderful she is and how I am blessed to know her and have her in my life.

[Melbadaze]

cmac, the last couple of days I've been thinkimg about saying to my T "thank you for being you", and that meant just like you shared, thank you for you just as you are, imperfections too.

T once said that it wouldn't be good for me or for any child to have a perfect mother becausae that lEaves no room for the child/me to be ok with my own imperfections. In the beginning thats a scary thought because dome of us had a lot lEss then perfect growing up, but yes I love my T for who she is to me, just as she is.

[sunrise]

I don't think therapy with my T would be nearly as therapeutic if he were perfect. I like his little quirks and foibles; they can be endearing or frustrating--just as with anyone in my life. I think if he were this perfect person, I would feel oh so deficient by comparison. His not being perfect allows me to not be perfect too, and not be so hard on myself. He's human. So am I!

[WePow]

Sunrise has a great point! I actually learn a ton from watching my imperfect T respond to his mistakes. It allows me to see how to respond to my own mistakes with grace rather than beating myself up about the head and shoulders for them!

[WikidPissah]

Originally Posted by Melbadaze

T once said that it wouldn't be good for me or for any child to have a perfect mother becausae that lEaves no room for the child/me to be ok with my own imperfections.

WOW...I really needed to hear that. I have tried so hard to bring my kids up in an opposite environment than I was in, but as they have become young adults I see the mistakes I have made. I have been beating myself up for it.

[Melbadaze]

Eileen, I so get you..me too...I use to say to T whats to say my children won't be sitting a therapists couch one day? she said yes it will have been difficult for them because of your issues but unlike your adoptive mother who could see no wrong in what she did, you do and you Keep dialogue open with them, as long as you remain open and allow them to talk to you then it will be ok with them, its not the mistakes we make, its our rwactions to them. That helped me a lot.