[WikidPissah]

Today is usually T day. Since I have to take a break for a couple of months I won't be going. I'm thankful that I am not attached to much to T, so it really doesn't hurt that badly. There is this slight feeling of let down though, since I won't have anyone in real life to talk to. So I am writing what "might have" happened had I gone to T today. The words in italics are thoughts not spoken

T: So, how are you, how was your week
E: good (ugh, I feel like crap, my whole world is falling apart)
T: So you had some good moments in there?
E: it was nice being with my daughter on Friday (while she drove me to the freakin oncologist and I got more crappy news)
T: On a scale of 1 -10, how is the depression?
E: um, ah...(10, 10, 10 just tell him darn it!!!) well, maybe a 5.
T: and what have you been doing to cope with the depression
E: Gym, cleaning (sleeping sleeping and more sleeping) oh, and I guess I am napping a bit much.
T: any sui thoughts going on
E: (damn it...the 4 questions, I hate this part) well, maybe a little, but its all good...I can handle it (be careful, he's gonna try and trip you up)
T: OK, so it's a yes to thoughts...any plan?
E: (see...I knew this was coming, he just wants to throw you in a hospital and get you out of his hair) um, fleeting stuff...nothing really solid
T: Means? Do you have the means?
E: ( f me, means, hell everyone has the means, who's he kidding) No
T: Ok, last one...Intent...do you have Intent
E: H e l l No...I'm good. (I think I passed)
T: Well, we just want to remember our goal, to stay out of the hospital.
E: Yes, definitely, that's really important to me. (ok, got thru the questions, looking good...)
T: So last week...let me see...we were touching on how stressful it is to be your mother's full time caregiver.....

((((((((((((Eileen))))))))))))))))

I'm SO sorry you can't get the support you need from T right now. It sounds like a really hard time.

We're always here at PC Maybe that can help a little?

[sittingatwatersedge]

(((((((((((((((((((((( Eileen)))))))))))))))))))))))

O gosh Eileen. OK if I sit by you for a while?

[peaches100]

Hi Eileen,

If this type of communication is typical for you in session, i'm wondering why you don't feel able to answer your t's questions honestly???

[peaches100]

She won't be able to help you if you aren't truthful with her about your thoughts and feelings. Are you afraid she'd respond badly if you told her the truth?

[WikidPissah]

Originally Posted by peaches100

Hi Eileen,

If this type of communication is typical for you in session, i'm wondering why you don't feel able to answer your t's questions honestly???

I am not trying to be dishonest...I just have a totally inability to speak without filtering every word. This is going to sound weird, but to me, saying what's going thru my mind feels rude. I know, I know, I am wasting time and money. That's probably why it's a good thing I am entering into a 12 week break.

[Fartraveler]

I am not trying to be dishonest...I just have a totally inability to speak without filtering every word.

Eileen, me too.

What helps me a lot is, lots of times before sessions I send her an email of "These are the things I'm not going to talk to you about today."

Then she can bring it up, and it's easier somehow.

-Far

[WikidPissah]

Originally Posted by Fartraveler

"These are the things I'm not going to talk to you about today."

OMG!!!
lol lol lol

Thank you for that Far...I REALLY needed the laugh. If or when I go back to T...I will definitely keep this trick in mind.

[SenatorPenguin8081]

Originally Posted by Eileen2010

Today is usually T day. Since I have to take a break for a couple of months I won't be going. I'm thankful that I am not attached to much to T, so it really doesn't hurt that badly. There is this slight feeling of let down though, since I won't have anyone in real life to talk to. So I am writing what "might have" happened had I gone to T today. The words in italics are thoughts not spoken

T: So, how are you, how was your week
E: good (ugh, I feel like crap, my whole world is falling apart)
T: So you had some good moments in there?
E: it was nice being with my daughter on Friday (while she drove me to the freakin oncologist and I got more crappy news)
T: On a scale of 1 -10, how is the depression?
E: um, ah...(10, 10, 10 just tell him darn it!!!) well, maybe a 5.
T: and what have you been doing to cope with the depression
E: Gym, cleaning (sleeping sleeping and more sleeping) oh, and I guess I am napping a bit much.
T: any sui thoughts going on
E: (damn it...the 4 questions, I hate this part) well, maybe a little, but its all good...I can handle it (be careful, he's gonna try and trip you up)
T: OK, so it's a yes to thoughts...any plan?
E: (see...I knew this was coming, he just wants to throw you in a hospital and get you out of his hair) um, fleeting stuff...nothing really solid
T: Means? Do you have the means?
E: ( f me, means, hell everyone has the means, who's he kidding) No
T: Ok, last one...Intent...do you have Intent
E: H e l l No...I'm good. (I think I passed)
T: Well, we just want to remember our goal, to stay out of the hospital.
E: Yes, definitely, that's really important to me. (ok, got thru the questions, looking good...)
T: So last week...let me see...we were touching on how stressful it is to be your mother's full time caregiver.....

So I see I'm not the only one with a different internal dialog going on!
Kudos for being your mother's FT caregiver. I couldn't go through with that.