[peaches100]

I just got a call from the hospital where my t works. They told me that my t had an emergency and will be gone all next week, so my session is cancelled.

I'm not worried so much about missing a session, but i'm worried about my t and what might have happened!! I have a terrible problem with worry as it is (I have GAD). Without knowing what's happened, my mind jumps to all sorts of scary conclusions. I don't know how to manage this worry for the next 1-1/2 weeks.

Has this happened to anybody else with their t? If so, how did you manage your worry??

Yes! I got an e-mail on a Sunday night from my T saying that he had had an accident and was home from the ER and needed to cancel appts for a few days. It freaked me out, and I imagined all kinds of worst-case scenarios. It turned out to be something SO minor...he just couldn't work because of the meds he had to be on.

Try not to let your imagination get the best of you. I know it's hard.

[with or without you]

Sorry this has happened to you. I've never had a situation where it's been an "emergency" and the cause is unknown. The only times where I was really personally concerned about my therapist's well-being were when she had knee surgery and when she told me her mother passed away. This is a tough one, I don't know what to tell you. I bet it's a family emergency. Hopefully you will be able to distract yourself somewhat until then, but I know that's way easier said than done.

[Omers]

My experience is that if it is really bad that is not how they handle it. I am sure your T will be OK.
Use all the self care skills your T has taught you. It will help you feel close to them as those skills are very valuable gifts your T has given you. What could mean more to your T when they get back than hearing the skills you practiced? It lets them know you care in a very approprite way and it lets them know they are doing their job well. Then you can talk about the feelings and experience.

[WikidPissah]

gosh...I know this must be hard for you, but you got to let T take care of T and You take care of You. T will be ok, just make sure you are.

[rainbow8]

I'm sorry, Peaches! I know I'd be a wreck if it were my T!! Maybe she will call or email you and let you know what happened later on when she can. You can pray for her and her family. That will help. You call look in the obits if you think her Mom passed away. Sorry if that's morbid but it's what I would do.

[Omers]

phew, thanks Rainbow...It is nice to know that I am not the only one to jump to checking the obits!

Peaches I recently had a similar situation with my T. He called from the hospital where he works and said he needed to cancel our appointment because of an "accident". In the back ground, I could hear someone saying they were taking him down to the ER. I panicked. I knew from the past that my T would tell me what was happening as soon as he could. I emailed him asking if he was all right. He wrote back and told me he had been attacked by a patient and was very bruised up. I've asked him what would happen if he had an accident. He assured me he has other therapists in his practice and either they would call me or his wife. In any event, I would know what was going on.
I had to use every soothing technique in the book to get through that but I did and he did. I worry consiantly about him; he is not a young man and anyone can get hurt. He knows how important it is for me to know the truth. That gives me the power to get through almost anything with time.
I hope you and your T come through this all right. It is very scary but may bring you a closer T relationship . I will think of you both.

[peaches100]

Thanks everyone. I'm trying so hard not to worry, but it comes to my mind over and over again, and i have to put it back out of my mind over and over again.
My first thought was that my t's mom died -- she in her 90s and has been failing. But an online search of obituaries in her state didn't turn anything up in the right age range. If she has died, it may be too early still for an obit.

I can't believe how hard it is for me, not knowing what's going on! My t had an emergency early in our work together, but the person who called me back then told me what happened, so i didn't have to worry and speculate.

All i can do aside from praying is to keep busy with my own responsibilities and try not to think about it.

[rainbow8]

I'm so sorry you still haven't heard anything, Peaches. Can you call the hospital where T works again, and see if they will tell you anything? Or maybe she put a message on her email?

Waiting is SO hard. I hope the time passes quickly and you find out what's going on. I agree that praying will help you.

[sunrise]

I hope your T is OK, peaches.

Originally Posted by peaches

Has this happened to anybody else with their t?

One time my first T was injured in a car accident on the way to her office for my appointment. She just never showed up, so after waiting for about 45 minutes, I left. She had actually called me on her cell phone from the scene of the accident but the message didn't reach me until that night. And then she called me again the next day. (She felt bad about leaving me there waiting and never showing up.) It did feel good to hear she was doing OK, in her own voice.

Hopefully, your T is doing fine and you will get some reassurances soon or at your next session.

Thinking of you.

[with or without you]

any word?

[peaches100]

I decided to call the hospital again where my t works. The scheduler told me my t was OK, but she couldn't tell me anything more without her permission. So, at least i know my t didn't get hurt. Still, i feel bad that she didn't at least let me know something about what's going on. She knows how the unknown really makes me worry. I'm kind of surprised she didn't call or email me at least a short message.

What's weird is that yesterday at work, i checked my "call log," which keeps track of everybody who has called me, whether they leave a message or not. My t's cell phone number was on it. But she didn't leave me a message. I'm thinking that she just dialed it by mistake and then hung up when she realized it. For some reason, that makes me feel worse. It would have been the perfect opportunity to let me know she was OK and set my mind at ease. But i guess she's not thinking about me right now, she is thinking about her family emergency. i understand totally. i just feel sad.

[pachyderm]

(((((peaches)))))

[with or without you]

glad to hear she doesn't (at least) have any health problems

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by peaches100

i checked my "call log," which keeps track of everybody who has called me, whether they leave a message or not. My t's cell phone number was on it. But she didn't leave me a message. I'm thinking that she just dialed it by mistake and then hung up when she realized it.

Or it could be that she reached your voice email and didn't want to leave such a personal message on your work phone. She may be having a hard time and didn't want to hear "leave a message after the beep." Who knows. (I often call people and don't leave a voice message.) I guess I just want to offer that there are many possibilities for why her number appeared on your call log besides that she dialed your number by mistake. I'm sorry she was unable to connect with you when she called, peaches. Maybe she'll call again. I'm glad you were able to get the reassurance from the hospital that she is OK. Phew! Hopefully, she will be back soon.

[peaches100]

I just found the obituary on the Internet in an online Ohio newspaper. My t's mother did die. She was 97.

[with or without you]

reminds me of when my T's mother died...she told me that herself, though, when she called to cancel. I looked it up online later and felt really, really bad for doing it...like I invaded her privacy. I never told her I did that and I never will, either.

[rainbow8]

So your hunch was correct, peaches. I'm sorry but I'm relieved that you know the answer now. I don't think you should feel guilty for looking online. It was a tough situation, not knowing the reason your T left suddenly, and worrying. I would have searched too.

[peaches100]

I don't feel guilty for seeing an online newspaper obituary. I just feel really bad for my t. I just feel a real sense of compassion for her, and wish there was something i could to ease her pain, as she has done so many times for me. . .

[rainbow8]

When she comes back and you see for a session, you can tell her what you just wrote. You can send a card, but I think the words you wrote would be very meaningful to her.

I was responding more to what with or without you posted about feeling like she invaded her T's privacy looking up an obit, so I wanted to give my opinion.

[with or without you]

I sent mine a card too

[with or without you]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I was responding more to what with or without you posted about feeling like she invaded her T's privacy looking up an obit, so I wanted to give my opinion.

btw, (I believe it was you - with the driving by your T's house)...I showed my T my response to you. She said none of my curiosities about her bothered her at all and it was completely natural to feel that way, most clients do. I just don't feel comfortable telling her I saw that obituary of her mom, you know...listing the names of her husband and all her siblings.

[Omers]

Better to know than to make an a* of yourself.
I worked with a T for about 2 years before I ever felt safe enough with her to start talking about mother stuff. I had an hour long session of just b*ing about everything my mother had screwed up. The session ended and T walked me to the door. Another T was just coming down the hall as I was leaving. The other T came running to mine, gave her a huge hug and said how sorry she was to hear of her mothers passing. When the Obit came out I discovered that her mom had died Sunday and I had seen her Tuesday. OMG did I feel like crap! My T never allowed me to discuss that session with her and it still bugs me! I haven't worked with her for years!