[suzzie]

not sure how i feel about going to t anymore. the waiting between sessions is so hard. i feel like i barely go. seems like im always waiting around 20 days. snd thats hard to do over and over. last time it was 43 days. and right now i have 11 more days. cant change the waiting in between tho. its this or nothing. if i cant make this work ill just go back to not dealing with it. mentally/emotionally i dont know how much more i can take. and the stuff thats done in t is so distant by the time i go again. i dont know if it is worth it this way.

[rainbow8]

I can understand your feelings, Suzzie. I forgot why you can't find a T closer to you. Is that a possibility at all? I used to see my T once a month when I was cutting down sessions and terminating therapy, but it was very difficult. I really wasn't ready to end therapy, and I needed regular sessions. It sounds like you do too. Can you have phone sessions once a week? I'm sorry I forgot the circumstances, except for the driving in the snow problem. I hope you can figure something out even if it doesn't seem like there's an alternative, sometimes there is.

[Sannah]

I can understand why that would be hard. Yeah, why can't you get a therapist that you can see more often?

[suzzie]

guess i do an incredibly poor job of expressing my thoughts in writing.

was hoping for some encouragement for waiting between sessions.

doesnt matter.
cause in reality this was really just a selfish post anyway. sorry.

not looking for a new t. i like this one.
just cant see her more often. doesnt matter why.
sometimes the easy answer isnt the right answer. (get a new t)
just would have liked some help with ideas on how to handle the waiting.

i think all this post accomplished was making me look stupid.

[jazzy123456]

I disagree. you don't look stupid. and honestly, cuz I have a HARD time waiting myself, I think therapists should discuss beforehand--this process of "waiting"--what we should do, how we should feel, boundaries that are clearly made as well, cuz after going through that myself---I see flaws in the way therapy is done in many ways---a lot of us on here ave addressed so much stuff---a variety of stuff and it just makes me wonder...? but, good luck to you in this waiting process..it is really what it is HARD. idk how to help cuz I am going through it, i just try to write as much as i can, cuz thats my hobby, work, distract myself, spend time with people, anything to help the time pass.

[sugahorse1]

You are not being stupid - most of us would battle to have to wait between sessions. Have you told your T how hard it is? If you cannot see this T more often, can you maybe receive a weekly, supportive and uplifting mail from her? Or ask her to write you letters to open and read on a weekly basis?

I hope we are able to offer you some form of support when you are really feeling down. The psychotherapy forum has some very knowledgable and supportive people - lean on us when things get too much to carry on your own

[Sannah]

Hmmmmm, you asked for something and didn't get it and I get the feeling that you were a little upset with this but then you turned it onto yourself?

[WePow]

Tips on waiting:

1) Have your T give you homework that has to be done daily until the next session.
An example is "Each day, write out 5 things that made you smile."

2) Start a therapy art journal. Between sessions, work on drawings that express what you feel about therapy or things you talked about in session. Bring this into session with you to show T what went on while you were apart.

3) Perhaps ask about recording the sessions. If you are able to record the session, you can play it back on days that are hard for you to not be there. This may help you keep a bond.

Sending you big hugs!

[Melbadaze]

I dont know why the gap between sessions, not sure why you haven't explained about that, but personally I;d find the gap untheraputic and it would be more like a check in kinda of thing then therapy...I'm sure there are other options you could look at that would benefit you.

[rainbow8]

I'm sorry you didn't get what you wanted from your post, Suzzie. I'm glad you said that, and got some different kind of replies. I like WePow's suggestions very much. Does your T know how your schedule makes you feel? What does she say? Will she allow emails or phone calls in between? It IS hard to maintain the continuity with so much time between sessions. People were responding to what you posted about not being sure if it's worth it. I hope that your T will allow some kind of contact with you while you are waiting.

Do you have anything of hers? I wonder if she'd allow you to do what my T and did with the small stuffed teddy bears. I bought one for her and one for me. She has hers in her office and mine is at home. Or, can you give her something of yours to keep? I'm not sure if what you're feeling is the lack of connection, but if so, those are my ideas.

Posting here about what's going on with you can help. It usually helps me, but I probably write too much about my sessions. Just another idea.

Emailing or journaling what you want to tell your T even if you can't send them to her. Do you do that? But I really like WePow's suggestion of homework T gives you.

Good luck! I hope something in this thread will be helpful to you.

[suzzie]

thank you for the replies.

melbadaze, i wasnt referring to the replies i got. i said thank you for them.
guess im still not writing clear enough. sorry. and im definitely not playing a game. sorry you thought i was.

[Melbadaze]

perhaps the replys you recieved were important to those that replied? Sorry I hate games...

[ECHOES]

20 days and 43 days is an awfully long time to have to wait. I can imagine it is agonizing and feels as if you hardly go. Is there a way to see her more often?

Writing in a journal is one thing to do to help stay connected to T between times you get to see her.

Another suggestion that I recomment highly is to speak with your T about the length of time between sessions being very hard for you. Let her in on this and see what the two of you can come up with.

Waiting and missing are hard.

[Sannah]