 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
Jan 20, 2011, 04:13 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
i've been thinking a lot about therapy lately, and trying to figure out what exactly it is. there have been a lot of posts recently about "being stuck" or "going nowhere," and i'm wondering if a lot of us are going through the same thing. so, i thought i'd ask what you all think therapy is..
is it a place to talk? is it finding a friend? paying a friend? is it helping you live your life? is it necessary? it's hard to even grasp the concept of what therapy is, and, at this point, what life was like before it. sometimes on my way to therapy though, i think, "what am i doing? where am i really going? how is this going to help me?" i was just curious if any of you feel the same way, and are wondering what therapy really is. and if anyone would like to try to define it, please do! |
|
#2
Jan 20, 2011, 04:21 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
I don't define it for myself as finding/paying a friend....I do have friends who play a wonderful role in my life. However, I think of it as finding a teacher, a guide, a helper....someone who can go beyond and help me understand and bear burdens that I wouldn't necessarily want to ask my friends to shoulder. Someone who can help me see the patterns in my mind, in my emotions and help me change, give me ways to help me change myself. Someone who can truly see my pain and not judge.... That's just a small part of it for me. |
|
#3
Jan 20, 2011, 05:22 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
You read my mind, 78! In my recent email to T, I actually typed out "What is a therapist, anyway?" Then, being in my transference mode, I said she felt like family, and maybe a sister I never had!
 I feel so close to her.I agree with poetgirl that therapy can be all those things, and more. I'm sure there are dictionary definitions, but ha! We KNOW the clinical definition doesn't begin to define it. Therapy to me is a place where I'm learning to be me, with no censoring of my thoughts and feelings. It's a place where, when I am me, I get accepted and not judged. There's no other place like that. Therapy is a place to get my needs met, but hopefully to learn how to meet them myself and not need my T. I do feel like therapy for me has been a place to have a friend, a mother, a confidante, even a romantic interest. Then, to discuss why I want her to be those people. Therapy is a place to discuss my problems, concerns and anything going on in my life that I can't cope with, knowing I will get compassion and respect back. Therapy has been an education for me, about me, a fascinating journey. I can't say it's necessary; it didn't save my life but it's helped me understand myself better and to make changes. It's almost a year with my T and I brought up discussing what's happened in this time. She agreed we should talk about it. So, I think we can each have specific goals for therapy; it's not the same for everyone. I think my first T told me the goal was for me to have a more satisfying life. So, therapy is a place to learn how to do that. It's like a college for life. Interesting thread, 78! Thanks! 
|
|
#4
Jan 20, 2011, 05:29 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
As for a definition of therapy. That is very complicated. Maybe someone else can help with that one. |
|
#5
Jan 20, 2011, 05:46 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
thinking of it more.....I think it is also sort of a relationship model for me, where I'm learning about how I have interacted/do interact in my relationships with others and I could interact differently, in improved ways...and in learning how to manage my relationship with my T, I'm also learning how to manage, or even to build, real world relationships...
and considering the question of am I paying for a friend? well no, I don't want her to be my friend, but I do have to admit at times I feel like I'm paying someone to love me (not the way a friend or a lover or a mother would, but some kind of love....can't define it either  ), that I need someone to see all the scars and flaws and hidden darkness and such and still love me, respect me in some way....... and to teach me to love myself, too.and is it necessary? for me, yes! I have been strong enough to survive all this time, with great burdens and wounds, and now it is time to admit that it's OK to have help and support......chase away the shadows of the past so that they darken the present less and the future can indeed be brighter. I don't expect my T to be the sun that brightens the future, but I think therapy is the thing that can help me see the sun and love the sunlight more.... So now I've spent more time thinking about what therapy is.....with no clearer of a definition 
|
 alias123
|
|
#6
Jan 20, 2011, 06:15 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
It is not a friend... that is what I see.
Not sure what therapy is except to take up space. Just help for problems I guess. |
|
#7
Jan 20, 2011, 06:51 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
#8
Jan 20, 2011, 06:53 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
For the longest time I thought that therapy was the place to go to get the answers to all of the problems in life. Was I wrong!
But now I think I see it more as having a person who will never judge me, no matter what I tell them, who won't be scared away by what I have to say. I can share my burden in therapy so that I don't have to shoulder it alone. |
| sittingatwatersedge
|
|
#9
Jan 20, 2011, 06:58 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
The article on PC about psychotherapy says that most therapy today is short term, under a year. Is this forum atypical, then? Maybe if therapy is less than a year, you don't need to write about it?
|
|
#10
Jan 20, 2011, 07:59 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
And it is the logical, technical definition of therapy.....but I've enjoyed thinking of the emotional/personal definition, too, that goes beyond the technical, dictionary, textbook definition.
|
|
#11
Jan 20, 2011, 08:53 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I think therapy is different things for different people. I've known people who went a few times to learn how to manage some troubling feelings or conflict in a relationship.
In my case, I am going to repair a lot of damage done over a long period of time. So for me, therapy is a place to create the kind of environment I should have had growing up in order to develop a sense of safety, boundaries, and self-regulation. That's why my T feels both like a business partner and a friend or family member. I figure that's why the word "therapist" exists--to show that he is neither friend, family, or physician. He's all three wrapped up, in a way. |
| rainbow8, SpiritRunner
|
|
#12
Jan 22, 2011, 10:20 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Therapy is a way for people who are distressed by their psychological problems to hopefully resolve some issues. It is not a friendship, since the therapist is getting paid to provide a service. I'm not sure how many people understand the process, but I think it would be to their own benefit to learn as much about it as possible before getting involved. It would also be beneficial to anyone considering therapy to learn as much as possible about the type of disorder they may have. It's a mistake to take a passive role and assume the therapist knows everything, they really, really don't.
|
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
