[suzzie]

does it matter if your t walks with you to their office when you come for your session. and then walks with you out after. my t used to both ways. but now doesnt either way. is this nothing important really. or do i push her that far away. that she is uncomfortable to walk with me to the door.

[scorpiosis37]

It may be just the opposite. Your T may have walked you in/out initially as a formality-- so that you knew the way, so that you would be more comfortable, etc. Now that you're not "new" anymore, you know where you're going, and you've become more comfortable with each another, she may not think it's necessary. So, perhaps, the fact that she isn't walking you in/out is actually a sign of closeness.

In my own experience, when I began therapy, T used to stand up and walk me to the door at the end of sessions (about 5 feet). Over time, she stopped doing that. The way I take it is that she trusts me to make it those 5 feet on my own. (I have similar confidence in my abilities, so it doesn't bother me in the least ).

If T no longer walking you in/out is bothering you though, you should bring it up with her. I'm sure she has no idea that it's caused you to question your relationship with her.

[skysblue]

It's funny how that passage from waiting room to office can be symbolic. I finally asked my T to not walk me to the door. I hate the transition in and the transition out and somehow or another, her walking me to door felt like she was kicking me out. Not rational, I know. And she's good - she remembers not to get up from chair at end of session. I have to be very alert when our time is up because there's no cue from her anymore.

I doubt there is any deep meaning as to why your t has changed how this happens. It just changed. Try not to overthink this.

[dismantle.repair]

Mine comes to get me from the waiting room and follows me into the office.. and then I follow her out after.
I hate being followed. T_T

[BlessedRhiannon]

My T changed behaviors and stopped walking me to the door, and it DID bother me, so I asked her about it.

She said that she'd gotten comfortable with me and didn't think that formality was needed. I felt like she was abandoning me...kind of a "don't let the door hit ya on the way out." We both just viewed her walking me to the door differently. I viewed it as support as I was leaving, and she viewed it as a formality. Once we talked about it and understood each other, I felt much better. I've told my T that now that I understand, she doesn't have to walk me to the door, but she always does so anyway, since she knows it's important to me.

[laceylu]

The T's and pdocs at my office walk everyone in and everyone out. No change. New or old clients get treated the same way. It is uncomfortable to me because I am so independent. I try to walk with her in now because I have decided it is a sign of rudeness if I do not. We talk and walk on the way out so we are in sync and I feel better about that. I live in a heavily populated area where competition is stiff and rudeness is not tolerated due to the large variety of people and increased cultural awareness. Thank goodness for a huge university hospital raising the standards in my neck of the woods.

[kaliope]

i have never read anyting in to the whole door walk thing. my T has to walk me to his door because he is at the end of a long hall behind a locked door. i hate the walk because he is always looking me up and down like he is trying to gauge where i am at. he doesnt have to walk me out because the door is only locked one way.

i do some counseling as part of my job and i always walk people in and out. never thought about the why i do it. just felt it was sorta rude to leave them on their own to find their way back to the reception area even though it would be hard for them to get lost. there is a gate of sorts that blocks clients from coming behind the counter without staff and i guess i feel it is my job to open that to let them back out.

[swimmergirl]

My first T always walked me to the room, never from. My current T walks me both to and from the room. When I asked him why...........he said it bothers him when other Ts don't do it. He has also said that when he was a client........it bothered him if they didn't walk him out. So.............I like that now.

[delicatefade26]

My T comes and gets me from the waiting room-but walks ahead of me (thank goodness b/c it would be awkward to have him follow me) and then he waits at the door and lets me in first...last session was the first time we arrived at the building the exact same time-so we walked in together (him still in front of me) and then he walked out the same time as well...which I kind of enjoyed and kind of not (for some reason this resulted in me not getting the usual goodbye hug) but it was okay

WOW-so much thought put into the rituals of arriving and departure from T...see what this relationship is doing to us!!!? lol : )

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by suzzie

does it matter if your t walks with you to their office when you come for your session. and then walks with you out after. my t used to both ways. but now doesnt either way. is this nothing important really. or do i push her that far away. that she is uncomfortable to walk with me to the door.

suzzie, it sounds like you have kind of a long walk from where you wait for therapy and where T's office is. If he doesn't come get you to walk you to his office, how do you know he is ready for you?

My T's waiting room adjoins his office so he just pokes his head out the door and says "c'mon in" when it is time for me to start.

suzzie, I don't see any thing negative in your T's behavior--that you are pushing her away because she doesn't walk with you. don't see that at all. When people don't behave consistently, it doesn't mean there is something wrong. Your T used to walk you to her office and now she doesn't. I think it's nice to give Ts (or any people in our lives) space to change and do things differently. It's not a bad thing she is not stuck in the rut of always having to walk you to her office. She's mixing it up, behaving like the changeable humans we are.

[suzzie]

thank you everyone

i think you are right. she is just mixing it up. i didnt think of that. i do like familiar alot. cause then i know what to expect. when it changes i always think i did something wrong to cause it.

[dismantle.repair]

^ I think it's just our T's behaviours.
I've tried every which way to get her to walk in front of me when we walk in... She just stops behind me and says, "Go on, crash."
Me: ....