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Jun 27, 2011 at 05:38 PM
#1
I suggested to my T. that I felt ready to stop therapy. He sort of became defensive and asked if there was another reason other than what I said. He talked about how he knows he sometimes had to play the bad guy...which made me think he thought I was mad at him...Then he said he hated for me to stop coming; that he had hoped I would have been coming for longer and that he would miss me.
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Jun 27, 2011 at 05:45 PM
#2
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Elder
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Jun 27, 2011 at 05:49 PM
#3
I like to think my T would miss me
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 ladyjrnlist
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Jun 27, 2011 at 05:52 PM
#4
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WePow
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2011
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Jun 27, 2011 at 05:58 PM
#5
They are human beings too. Of course there would be instances where they would like and truly miss a client when therapy ends.
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Dr.Muffin
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Jun 27, 2011 at 06:10 PM
#6
Logically, I know that my T. is more important to me than I am to him...
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ladyjrnlist
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Elder
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Jun 27, 2011 at 06:18 PM
#7
Actually, Ts do remember clients. My T was telling me about one client he met in an elevator after many years. He said he was SO HAPPY to see her. And he was happy that she was doing so well. He said he had thought about her from time to time and hoped she was doing well.
Ts have hearts. And your T WILL miss you. In a healthy way... In a different way... but it is still real emotion. |
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Dr.Muffin
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Jun 27, 2011 at 06:29 PM
#8
I still maintain contact with my t from way back when I was in college. We email back and forth pretty regularly (just social, friendly correspondence; we don't have a therapy relationship anymore). On occasion we talk on the phone. If I'm in town, I stop by and we have lunch. Yeah, we are attached I guess. We're life-long friends now.
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Hope-Full, skysblue, WePow
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Jun 27, 2011 at 06:35 PM
#9
That's real nice. I don't think that would be appropriate in our situation since my t. is a man. It would be nice to think that I could contact him in the future.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2009
Location: Michigan
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Jun 27, 2011 at 07:06 PM
#10
I would think that my T would miss me too. During our session today, I asked her if she was tired of hearing me talk about what happened with Ex-T, and she said no, that she enjoys every conversation we have and that I make her "think"...
 I guess that's a good sign?
__________________ Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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Grand Member
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Jun 27, 2011 at 07:30 PM
#11
When my former T first mentioned that therapy was winding down for me, I started to cry and then told him that I'd miss him. Without hesitation, he replied that he'd miss me too.
I think it's a little more complicated than therapists putting their feelings aside. A T wouldn't want to deny their feelings, I wouldn't think, but they would want to be very aware of them. Self-awareness is very important and can help the T keep therapy about the client. They may even learn more about ways to help a client by recognizing what feelings a client elicits. Part of what makes the relationship so healing is that it is genuine and real. |
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Dr.Muffin
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Grand Member
Member Since Sep 2009
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Jun 27, 2011 at 08:10 PM
#12
i totally get attached to my clients....not all of them, though.
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Hope-Full, PTSDlovemycats, rainbow_rose, skysblue, WePow, with or without you
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Jun 27, 2011 at 08:15 PM
#13
Sometimes I wonder if female T's, on average, get more attached than male T's. More oxytocin.
__________________ Conversation with my therapist: Doc: "You know, for the past few weeks you've seemed very disconnected from your emotions when you're here." Me: "I'm not disconnected from my emotions. I just don't feel anything when I'm here." (Pause) Me: "Doc, why are you banging your head against the arm of your chair?" Doc: "Because I'm not close enough to a wall." It's official. I can even make therapists crazy. |
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Member
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Jun 27, 2011 at 08:23 PM
#14
I've grown really attached to my T. Her name is Mary C. and she is the sweetest woman ^_^ She usually even brings her dog in her therapy sessions. :] Hmm, I wish I had a picture of Frieda (her dog). If I were to have to switch therapists however, I think I would have a bit of separation anxiety (or a LOT maybe) Besides Mary likes me a lot. She says I'm more open then most of her clients. She also says I'm more considerate then most teens my age. :] There's something about her that makes me feel secure, safe and even special ^_^ I don't I'll ever find another T like her :]
__________________ “We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.” - Paulo Coelho |
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Jun 27, 2011 at 08:27 PM
#15
Yes - we get attached to our clients. But it is (or should be) a healthy attachment. Where it's always about what is best for you regardless of how we feel.
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Indie'sOK, PTSDlovemycats, rainbow8, rainbow_rose, skysblue, WePow, with or without you
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Legendary
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Jun 27, 2011 at 09:09 PM
#16
Yes, some therapists get attached to their clients. If it becomes an issue or becomes too intense for the therapist to manage, it is sometimes called "counter transference". If a therapist gets too attached to a client, they've got some of their own issues to work out likely so it's normally suggested that T's have T's.
 Some attachment is normal, but a T doesn't necessarily have to like you to be able to work with you. It just makes it easier if they do like their client(s). __________________ 
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Grand Poohbah
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Jun 27, 2011 at 09:12 PM
#17
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Christina86
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Jun 27, 2011 at 09:26 PM
#18
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Grand Poohbah
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Jun 27, 2011 at 09:34 PM
#19
In my case there is no hiding it from me.
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Jun 27, 2011 at 09:36 PM
#20
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