I feel like telling somebody that I'm turned on by femdom
and male sexual submission. I've been on a femdom dating site for about 6 years now and I chat with people but I've never been on a date.

I'd like him to tell me whether it's a real taste that I have, or whether I'm only into it the same way everyone's into it and I should stick to normal relationships.

Thoughts? I would feel silly bringing it up for some reason.

Originally Posted by Illegal Toilet

I feel like telling somebody that I'm turned on by femdom
and male sexual submission. I've been on a femdom dating site for about 6 years now and I chat with people but I've never been on a date.

I'd like him to tell me whether it's a real taste that I have, or whether I'm only into it the same way everyone's into it and I should stick to normal relationships.

Thoughts? I would feel silly bringing it up for some reason.

What is femdom?

I always vote that if you have the urge to tell, you should.
I used to see a client who disclosed their sexual preferences and tastes and it made things a lot more clear regarding other areas of their life.

FYI - femdom is a female dominant

stormy, are you a therapist?

Originally Posted by Illegal Toilet

stormy, are you a therapist?

Yes, I am a master's level therapist.

[krisakira]

if you are having problems feeling shame or guilt or anything negative about your fetish then yea you could talk to your T about it. But it is not like it is vital to helping you with your other problems... sexual preferences are just that, it is not considered a problem or disorder or anything wrong. its like you like the color red over green. no big deal, just what you like. but yes, if you are finding it difficult to accept your preferences, it is something you should discuss with T. Also, if you feel you have said preference because of a past experience, that is something you could bring up to your T.

[WikidPissah]

Originally Posted by Illegal Toilet

I feel like telling somebody that I'm turned on by femdom
and male sexual submission.

If you feel like you want to share this then by all means you should. What is relevant to you is relevant to T.

[SpiritRunner]

sure, go ahead and share! if it's relevant to you and your life, it's relevant to share with your pdoc. like stormy said, it can help clarify other parts of you/your life.

[lastyearisblank]

Yeah there are therapists (at least in this city) who advertise themselves as being more open to clients with unusual sexual preferences. That sounds a bit awkward. I mean, they are comfortable with the emotional dynamics of all kinds of relationships. They can handle it if a client wants to talk about their sexual preferences. I feel like some people say "oh if you like bdsm or whatever it was because you have some abusive past you want to overcome." Not necessarily. I say if you trust your T then talk about it.

[Xeneon]

I totally agree with stormangels. If you think you want to then, just do it. Maybe it would acturally help you out in the long run, if you tell him. Take care!!!

I Just need to tell someone who can either validate or explain it for me.

[lastyearisblank]

Just out of curiosity is your T a man or a woman?

He's a man.

[lastyearisblank]

Do you care if he can relate or is it enough that he understand?

(Sorry for being nosy I'm just fascinated by this).

[RiverX]

Originally Posted by krisakira

if you are having problems feeling shame or guilt or anything negative about your fetish then yea you could talk to your T about it. But it is not like it is vital to helping you with your other problems... sexual preferences are just that, it is not considered a problem or disorder or anything wrong. its like you like the color red over green. no big deal, just what you like. but yes, if you are finding it difficult to accept your preferences, it is something you should discuss with T. Also, if you feel you have said preference because of a past experience, that is something you could bring up to your T.

krisakira, I see this differently. Our sexuality is an expression of something deep. It can also be a way of releasing something deep, but it has a meaning.
I would judge carefully if this is the person to help you, and what are you trying to achieve, what are you wanting, is he likely to be able to give you it.
good luck.