[pbutton]

I am not going to cancel.
I am going to tell T exactly what is going on.
I am going to discuss the emails that I sent him last week.
I am not going to throw a giant hissy and quit therapy.

My fear is trying to convince me to do otherwise. I'm hoping that announcing my intentions on the internet will help me realize what's important.

Of course if you think my T is absolutely wretched and I should run screaming in the other direction, you just let me know, I'm all ears.

Good for you, pbutton!!! You are so brave!

[pbutton]

Aww, thanks but I think it's more stubborness than bravery. On some level I WANT to do those things and I know I just need to plow through no matter how scary it gets. I will be terrified for sure.

I have developed some real anxiety issues with waiting in the waiting room. T told me it doesn't seem like I'm making any progress in that area. He's right. His solution is to try to talk about it. My solution is to avoid the waiting room and try to climb into his office via the window.

[sittingatwatersedge]

how about waiting in the waiting room with yr therapy burqa on? you can find a good range of them at the T Client Accessory Store.... new spring colors.....

maybe a pair of Groucho nose-and-glasses?

headphones?

I think we need a how-do-you-survive-the-waiting-room-time thread

[pbutton]

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

I think we need a how-do-you-survive-the-waiting-room-time thread

Oooh, good idea! I can't contribute until I build some skills though.

[Chopin99]

Originally Posted by pbutton

My solution is to avoid the waiting room and try to climb into his office via the window.

I love this. I'd have to climb a tree to get in the second story window of my T's office.

You're being brave. That's a good thing!

[blue diamond]

Food for thought PButton.
The same thing happens to me at times. I just put my headphones on with the music loud to try to drown out my anxiety and concentrate on breathing slow to lower my heart rate. I inhale and count one to three in my head, hold my breath for a second then exhale and count one to three. At the least, it's distracting. Maybe it's worth a try.

[stopdog]

Good luck. I always arrive just on time to avoid the waiting room.

[pbutton]

If worse comes to worse I can always use my phone to come read this thread while I'm waiting.

[stopdog]

we are here for you.

[sittingatwatersedge]

2T's waiting room is a couple of large leather wing chairs with a table in between. I am not tall so I had to either perch on the edge or sit way back into one; to calm my nerves I moved back into it, leaned my head back and closed my eyes.

Level of success: mixed. Nerves a little better; on the other hand the very first thing I heard out of 2T was "Hellloooooooooo...."

[unaluna]

My T is in a hirise... I would have to be Spiderwoman.

[skysblue]

Originally Posted by stopdog

Good luck. I always arrive just on time to avoid the waiting room.

I also arrive just in time but still I have to wait at least a minute before she comes to get me. Then to top it off, I continually am startled when she opens the door to waiting room. I have to concentrate on the door so I'm prepared. If my mind wanders for a moment and the door opens, I just about jump out of my skin.

Last week I told her that her door was too noisy upon her opening it - that it startled me too much. Isn't that the sign of real craziness? I told her to go into waiting room and listen to the door as i opened it for her. You have to give my T a lot of credit. Even with a stupid stunt like that she never gives me any sign that she thinks I'm beyond hope or that I'm 100% loopy.

Originally Posted by pbutton

I am not going to cancel.
I am going to tell T exactly what is going on.
I am going to discuss the emails that I sent him last week.
I am not going to throw a giant hissy and quit therapy.

My fear is trying to convince me to do otherwise. I'm hoping that announcing my intentions on the internet will help me realize what's important.

Of course if you think my T is absolutely wretched and I should run screaming in the other direction, you just let me know, I'm all ears.

You sound very determined - good for you!! Try to know that the fear is an emotion - just an emotion - and it doesn't really make any sense. You know you're headed in the right direction. If it were me, I would probably print out what you posted and keep it handy to reread. I'm very emotional, and I know how easy it is for emotions to just overpower any logical thought.

And remember that you need that determination on Thursday. You don't have to try to maintain that resolve constantly for the next 4 days. If you need a break, fantasize about doing anything else that will break the tension. But know, deep inside, that come Thursday, NOTHING will keep you from following the plan you set out here. Nothing. You WILL do it.

Hugs, and it will be worth it in the end.

[pbutton]

I actually feel somewhat ready for the waiting room now. I'll have my ipod, blue diamond's breathing , and the board. I'll be so relaxed that T won't even recognize me when he comes out. lol

[pbutton]

Originally Posted by TheBunnyWithin

And remember that you need that determination on Thursday. You don't have to try to maintain that resolve constantly for the next 4 days.

Ooh. Good point. I never would have come up with this on my own. I definitely see that you're right.

[sittingatwatersedge]

Originally Posted by pbutton

I actually feel somewhat ready for the waiting room now. I'll have my ipod, blue diamond's breathing , and the board. I'll be so relaxed that T won't even recognize me when he comes out. lol

mmm I can see it now.... lol

T: Pbutton, come on back
Pbutton: hang on, T, I want to finish reading this thread.

[skysblue]

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

mmm I can see it now.... lol

T: Pbutton, come on back
Pbutton: hang on, T, I want to finish reading this thread.

Hey, when I've gotten there early and I'm grooving with my ipod and reading a cool article in one of the magazines in the waiting room, I'm disappointed that T has interrupted me. Now I'm thinking I SHOULD go early so I can hang out more in her super cool waiting room.

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

mmm I can see it now.... lol

T: Pbutton, come on back
Pbutton: hang on, T, I want to finish reading this thread.

I have to laugh at this. I purposely get to T's office early so I can chill a little bit and read for awhile. He and I have actually had that conversation. Another time I fell soundly asleep on the couch in the waiting room (it's comfy), and he had to come over and wake me up.

My T doesn't have a waiting room. If I don't hit any traffic and I get there early, I park up for a while just down the road in a quiet spot, and sing along to the radio or my ipod in the car... then I rock up outside her house with a couple minutes to spare like I timed it to perfection Works for me, I've never been keen on the waiting room experience. If there was a waiting room I would probably still aim to get there a little early, because being on the last minute would probably cause me even more anxiety than the waiting would

I recommend a cheesy playlist, something that'll make you want to smile... you can't feel anxious if you're listening to 'YMCA'... can you?!

[nicoleflynn]

You may want to WRITE down what you need to say; that way you will be absolutely sure to get it all out. If you start to talk, it is easy to feel upset or distracted.

Hugs, Nicole

[elliemay]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

I have to laugh at this. I purposely get to T's office early so I can chill a little bit and read for awhile. He and I have actually had that conversation. Another time I fell soundly asleep on the couch in the waiting room (it's comfy), and he had to come over and wake me up.

Ha! I've fallen asleep in my therapist's waiting room too. He has this white noise machine, and it's so peaceful in there sometimes. BAM! I was out like a light. Next thing I knew, there he was, waking me up. I'm just glad I didn't slobber or anything.

[bluemountains]

Way to go, Pbutton! I love your determination, and the fact that you have a great plan.
Bluemountains

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by pbutton

If worse comes to worse I can always use my phone to come read this thread while I'm waiting.

That's what I'd do! I'm practically fixed on the little screen until T arrives.

[pbutton]

I am not going to cancel.
I am not going to throw a giant hissy and quit therapy.
I am not going to sit around today trying to come up with reasons to hate T.

Instead I will think about how nice it was of T to offer me this session.

At the very least I can look forward to Thursday, knowing I'll get an hour where I am not arguing with T in my head. That will be a nice change.