[lostmyway21]

So T and Pdoc talked yesterday. Yesterday Pdoc said he thinks there is something more going on besides my ptsd, but didn't get specific. Today I went to T and he brought up there conversation. I guess they both agree on a med change is in order, and possibly a new diagnosis. They think I have a mood instability like bipolar, on top of my ptsd. I don't know why but this makes me feel horrible.

Ughh I didnt even try to convey to T how bad it made me feel.

The idea of having a diagnosis of bipolar disorder can be pretty daunting. I have PTSD and have bipolar disorder so I do understand. The idea of multiple diagnoses is just kind of disheartening. I remember when I received that additional diagnosis I felt like it meant doom and that I was hopeless.

You aren't though. If bipolar does end up being your diagnosis, nothing has really changed except perhaps your pdoc/T will have a better understanding of how to work with you. You are still the same person. Hang onto that idea.

Talk to you T about how you are feeling, what you are thinking, about all of this. It does take a shift in your thinking.

[lostmyway21]

I'm not sure how to tell him how I feel about it yet. I was okay about being a certain amount of screwed up (my ptsd) but now I am overwhelmed with even more self hate. If that even makes sense? I will know my official Dx probably tomorrow if I go back to pdoc for new meds.

[sunrise]

That's hard news to hear.

[lostmyway21]

Originally Posted by sunrise

That's hard news to hear.

Thanks.

I'm really on edge right now. I went against my better judgement and reached out to my family for some support, but they just made fun of me and mocked me. So I'm pretty triggered, and I'm just trying not to have any rageful ptsd episodes.