contracts w/Ts... Sui mentioned.

Well, I have not been as involved latley b/c I am just in a really bad place once again. Anxiety really ramped up and this week has been hell. Anyways, I saw T today. Admitted to him that I have been having a lot more suicidal thoughts, and he asked if I had a plan. I was honest and said yes. So, he said.. Well, you know what we do next. Contract that I wouldn't hurt myself between now and my next appointment which is this coming Wednesday, as well as if I was immediate danger to go to 911 or if my thoughts were getting worse to call T. I of course agreed because I know the only other choice is to go to the hospital. Is it just me or do these type of contracts just seem so silly?

I mean all my T has is my nod of the head to agree to the terms. Is that really supposed to really stop me from actually following through with my plans? I mean, don't get me wrong.. I am not feeling like I am going to do anything like right now. I am just thinking about the contracts that my T and I have and have heard other people have agreed to the same kind of contract as well.. I was just wondering everyone thoughts on the matter?

I'm wondering also how contracts might help. I'll be curious what answers you receive. It seems to me, and I most certainly am wrong, but it seems to me that when that black place envelopes you that thoughts about contracts may go out the window. But maybe not. I really don't know.

The first therapist I saw about 25 years ago tried to do the contract thing over si with me. It was ridiculous and I did not agree to contract for anything nor did I tell her anything else about si. She really should have known not to use the word contract to a person who had just become a lawyer.

contract did help me, I think, a bit in the past, but was also hospitalized a few times. So I am not sure if it was the contract itself, the work done in therapy, my relationship with therapist or a mix of the 3...
Good question and hope you feel better soon

My promise to call my T BEFORE I do anything keeps me safe. 1. T is always available when I'm in crisis. 2. I'll never be left alone with my sui thoughts long enough to act on them. 3. He's never broken any of his promises to me, so I could never break my promise to him.

My T insisted on me signing a contract that I'll stay alive. So I did. I actually signed it on paper, name and signature and all that. At first I was furious because she basically made me do it, then I thought it's silly (what can she do if I breach it, really), then I thought maybe it's some stupid legal stuff she has to have, then I labeled it BS and decided I don't have to comply because she basically forced me to sign it and forced contracts are not really valid from a legal perspective (yeah, I was that obsessed about proving it wrong and not fair). But then when very hard time came it actually helped me, because a contract (whatever form of it) is in essence a promise. And I keep my promises. At least I do my best to try to keep it. The fact that I promised T I'll stay alive kind of motivated me to do all the right things to fight all the crap in my head. So I guess I'm an example that the contract stuff sometimes actually works. Who knew...

Contract helped me too- but it was verbal, not signed. It helped me because when I thought about hurting myself, the thought of T and my promise would enter my mind and my connection with T entered my mind- and that connection was enough to make me want to try again. It gvae me hope. T gave me hope.

I agree with the above. When I really make a promise, it is almost as good as gold. I hate failing, I hate letting people down, and I hate breaking promises.

My T asked me to promise I would text her before I attempted Sui. At first I just said fine...whatever you want. She stopped me and said it was serious and that it needed to be thought about. Took me a few weeks but I agreed.

I don't have one and currently would not sign a contract. I wouldn't even remember there was a contract in that state I'm all action no brain at those times.

I've never had a T who was into making contracts
I imagine though that for some people it makes you feel more secure; that there is somewhere to turn when your head is being overrun with sui thoughts; that it gives you something to hold on to in those moments where it feels like there is nothing to hold
Maybe it also reaffirms that the T cares which could be helpful especially when it's more a case of the thoughts are there but you don't really want to act on them; just don't know what alternatives there are and can't see them
For those where it's beyond that; i don't know that any contract would really be that helpful because there is no reason not to break it if you are beyond the point of caring at all

Is there anything your T could do that would help healed; if the contract idea isn't working for you?

The only T I had a "contract" with was my 2nd T. Basically I said that I would "do the work" and she said she would help me. We shook hands on that. Some contract...but we both did what we said we'd do!

I am not sure if there is anything else that T can do.. except continue to do what we are doing in thearpy. I think that until I feel like the panic disorder is no longer taking control of my life I may have on and off thoughts and plans of suicide.. T even says that a certain amount of thinking about it is okay and is a coping mechanisim.. understand that is not a good or healthy way out of my issues is what I need to learn. I guess it is a matter of me finally accepting who I am, realizing that I am actually important to the people around me and that I do contribute and I am not a burden to my family. I suppose that all takes time.

My T once said he usually contracts with sui people but he wouldn't insult my intelligence by trying to do that. "Just call me if it gets bad, ok?" That's what he said. In essence it's like a contract, it give me the green light to call. I don't have to think "should I call" "will I bother him" "maybe email instead"...etc. It's leaves me in a "I am supposed to call" frame of mind which makes it easier to reach out.

I've never had a T who like contracts either. My current T finds them a bit contrived I think. He's more about learning my symptoms and patterns, having a concrete plan of action to get me the proper help and the proper time, etc. That has worked quite well for keeping me safe; after all, I'm still here.

I don't have a contract with my T but we have an understanding, and I have used it, that I can call in a crisis. I do, however, have a written "contract" posted inside a cabinet in my kitchen for my family. It's a "what to do" if my behavior starts to change or escalate into mania/depression or SI/SU. This way I can't back out because I wrote it and told them what to do if XYZ happens.

I signed a contract when I was in my bad place. But I broke it in self harm. T didn't do anything about it. I think the contract was to protect him from whatever I might do. But another part of me knows he really wanted me to stay safe.

I had my first visit (ever) to a therapist today and he said we will be coming up with a safety plan. Is this the same thing as a contract?

I also have an understanding with my T. We have known each other many years and he can usually read me like a book. I know he would never lie to me and he knows I wouldn't knowingly lie to him. T is available 24/7 so I have no excuse not to call him if I feel sui. I told him, I'd do the best I could.