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May 14, 2012 at 11:35 AM
#1
Let me start by saying, Im talking out and out lies.
Ill start, Im the only T in town who will see you because of your sexuality.    (no, everyone will see me except a few tight *** Old Baptist types and they can bite me)I never dump a client. ( NEVER say NEVER, until now)Im not mad at you. ( yes you are you big ole liar... )I know you have boundary issues so ill consult you before changing any if necessary.  (LOLOLOLOLOL, if it sounds too good to be true, email)Ill be here for you, your safe, you can cry.  ( Unless its over something I am done talking about, so you better suck it up or Ill end session early.)All xT of course.....  Anyone else? |
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 Anonymous32491, Anonymous33145, Anonymous43209, karebear1, Mike_J, SpiritRunner, WePow
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May 14, 2012 at 12:05 PM
#2
all of the above-minus the sexuality part
"its nothing you did" "i PROMISE to never ever reject or abandon you"-BULL!!!!!! gah so incredibly triggered
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Infamous Vampire Duck
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Location: Mid West
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May 14, 2012 at 12:06 PM
#3
A few my therapist has told me
You are a good person Your life has value You will be OK and so on..... Those aren't up to the lies your therapist told you but at the moment they are very difficult to handle __________________ “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi |
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| learning1, vin_rouge
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2011
Posts: 2,082
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May 14, 2012 at 01:05 PM
#4
Can we please include "manipulations"? in addition to lies?
*Setting phone to go off repeatedly during session; *Turning paintings in office upside down; *Unbuttoning shirt to God-knows-where to see if I'm triggered...Yick! *Calling me on Saturday morning to re-schedule Tuesday appointment; *placing provocative books with spines showing on desk Right back atcha.....These aren't up to the lies that your T told you, but at the moment, they are very difficult to handle. |
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| anonymous112713, Anonymous43209, karebear1, Mike_J, WePow
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Infamous Vampire Duck
Community Liaison
Member Since Dec 2009
Location: Mid West
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May 14, 2012 at 01:19 PM
#5
Quote:
Unbuttoning their shirt that seems a huge ethical issue (though I have to admit I wouldn't mind my therapist doing that) Provocative books??? what is this person thinking??? I hope you have found a new therapist.. __________________ “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi |
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May 14, 2012 at 01:20 PM
#6
what do therapists get from lying? I'm confused. I have a very healthy well qualified therapist and am bewildered reading these posts.
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 BlessedRhiannon, rainboots87, scilence, vin_rouge
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May 14, 2012 at 01:25 PM
#7
Quote:
How is "You will be OK" a lie? Can either of you foretell the future? Wouldn't it be better to believe that at some time you WILL be OK, and work toward it? |
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Mike_J
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Magnate
Member Since Dec 2010
Location: in my skin and soul
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May 14, 2012 at 01:42 PM
#8
T1 said, I will never leave you ....... She terminated me when I was in the hospital (not completely without warning, but much sooner than she had said she might refer me)
I asked her after one abrupt boundary change to please discuss it with me first the next time and not surprise me by telling me, oh I talked to my supervisor who said...... - it happened more than once more ..... She said one week - no, I won't stop hugging you. The next week - I talked to my supervisor and there will be no more physical contact ever .... No, I am not really angry anymore. I just wish she had been more careful with me and with her promises (which she really did seem to mean), but she didn't altogether understand her own counter-transference and then situations neither she nor I had anticipated arose. I don't know if it's always so much that T told lies as T made promises that shouldn't have been made because it wasn't truly possible to keep them 100%. |
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| anonymous112713
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Euphie Queen
Member Since Jul 2010
Location: New England
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May 14, 2012 at 01:46 PM
#9
"you're special to me"
"if you tell me the details you will feel better" "I will call you later" (all ex t's) __________________ never mind... |
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| anonymous112713, karebear1
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2011
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May 14, 2012 at 02:17 PM
#10
Quote:
I've moved on...but the memories are still very painful. What a nut job! When I probed about WHY, this T said that it was because a "mentor" had instructed that therapists all "use themselves" as ways to "move the therapy" if need be. I'm SO CREEPED out when I think back on all of this.... |
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| anonymous112713, Anonymous33145, karebear1, Mike_J
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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2011
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May 14, 2012 at 03:33 PM
#11
mcl6136- that guy was CREEPY. Reading what you wrote really kinda made me ill.
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2011
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May 14, 2012 at 04:29 PM
#12
Quote:
Writing it makes me ill too. The thought that there is someone out there, perpetrating all of this leaves me feeling nauseated, actually. From time to time, I'll meet someone here in town (fairly small city) who has seen this T and the stories are often the same. Oddly enough, he has a rather large following and some people who defend his tactics. But others react very strongly in the other direction, and act fast. For example, I met someone recently, a gay man who had two or three appointments with this T and quit very promptly. When I asked him why...he said...well that T called me from his home phone on Saturday night and I thought...this is ridiculous! And that was all it took...he quit! sorry for hijacking. As long-time posters know, this T relationship was very damaging to me... One of the things I'm currently working on is the ability to discern, decide and act and not look back and second-guess myself when faced with these kinds of people....trusting myself to know..Yes, writing about it makes me feel ill.... Thanks for the support MCL |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2011
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May 14, 2012 at 04:31 PM
#13
Quote:
I'm glad...not all of them are good, or even ethical. |
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Elder
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May 14, 2012 at 04:52 PM
#14
Even good Ts can lie at times I think. Maybe they don't know they are lying at the time? IDK. My T has canceled apt saying he was under the weather... then two days later when I saw him and asked how he was feeling he told me he had not been sick.
 If you are going to lie to a client, remember what lie you told them.
__________________ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
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| purplelephant, Wren_
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rainbow_rose
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May 14, 2012 at 04:53 PM
#15
"You have a special place in my heart."
"We can have a relationship without me hurting you." (meaning a professional one) "You are the highlight of my day." "I'm not 'on your parents' side'" Ugh. Also not nearly as bad as the majority here. But any lie from someone you trust is hard, right? |
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| Anonymous43209, SpiritRunner, WePow
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Big Poppa
Member Since Oct 2011
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May 14, 2012 at 05:28 PM
#16
Quote:
What have you done that disqualifies you as a "good person"? __________________ Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
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Member
Member Since Feb 2011
Posts: 180
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May 14, 2012 at 05:41 PM
#17
One time I wrote an appt down wrong and showed up an hour late. Next appt T says to me, I saw you pull in and I would have talk to you myself, but I had to take somebody back. This means she would have took her next client back 10 min early. Not sure if she is really lying to me, but she never comes out till 5 min after the hour.
Maggy Jo |
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Big Poppa
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May 14, 2012 at 05:49 PM
#18
Quote:
__________________ Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
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Free to live
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May 14, 2012 at 08:14 PM
#19
I'm the only one who can understand
You shouldn't tell anyone else these things You have &&&& wrong with you and I'm the only one who can help you You can't do homework You can't watch certain movies, your reaction would be too extreme You need to leave those 'friends' they aren't good for you You should talk about %%% and why he upsets you and share what triggers you about him it's the only way to sort this out You shouldn't be upset when you found out that %%% who we'd spent so much time talking about was actually your brother and you never mentioned it __________________   |
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| purplelephant
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May 14, 2012 at 08:25 PM
#20
I guess I've been lucky. I've been seeing my T for six years and I feel we have a totally honest relationship. I can't think of a single time he has either lied, slanted or stretched the truth. He doesn't manipulate me either. He's very caring and compassionate, and I've always known exactly where I stand with him - I trust him completely - and he's never broken that trust.
He's told me "I care about you" and he's shown it in hundreds of ways through the years. He's said "I'm committed to see you through this - I won't leave you" and he never has - his committment to my healing has never wavered. He's told me "It's safe in here" and he's always respected my boundaries and made me feel safe and protected even when addressing the scary stuff. No, he's not perfect, but he's never lied to me. __________________ Linda 
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rainboots87, SpiritRunner
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