[rainboots87]

It's only a couple a weeks till I move and only 3 sessions left with T. I'm starting (continuing?) to get upset about it, because I'm going to miss her soo much. I feel really embarrassed about it and really want her to comfort me. I'm avoiding calling or texting her to let her know since I see her Monday anyway and so I can try to deal with this on my own. I feel like I can't talk to any of my friends abt this bc who would understand?! "Hey, I pay this woman to listen to me every week and now I'm sad that I'm moving away from her and that she won't be part of my life anymore. More sad than leaving any of you, in fact..." Ugh!

It's different with friends bc I'll talk to them via phone/text/facebook/etc. and we'll hang out in the future. We even already have a tentative Europe trip together planned this fall (yay!). But even though I asked my T and she agreed that I could send her an update email maybe once a year, like I do with my old T, it's not the same at all.

Stupid feelings... I don't like feeling this way!

[pbutton]

Yes, it is so much harder because the contact is just going to stop. I also hate feeling this way.

[rainboots87]

Eek, I'm feeling a bit anxious about this today, but I know I can make it to tomorrow's session! Going out for a run since I haven't worked out this week and I find it very cathartic. Hopefully that'll help my mood a bit.

[pbutton]

Have a great run! Exercise always helps me too.

[adel34]

Hi Rainboots,
I totally understand how you feel! I just moved last week, and can no longer see my therapist who I worked with for a year and a half. We were so connected. I know she'll still think of me, and we can talk on the phone but it's not the same. Just saying, you're not alone. Even though I know it's really hard, i know it helped me to tell my therapist about my strong feelings of greif about leagving her. She did comfort me and it was like we were in it together. Just a thought. I'm here if you want to talk.

[rainboots87]

The feelings are popping up again! I don't want to leave her I want her to give me hugs and be my friend, but that can't happen. This really hurts.

[pbutton]

I am so sorry.

[rainboots87]

Today was our second to last session and I was a mess for most of it. I could barely look at her as I left, and I sat in my car with my head on the steering wheel and cried until I felt okay enough to drive home. This sucks and is so freakin' hard.

This is so hard, I feel your pain so clearly. When I moved, my t was willing to continue doing long distance sessions with me, which I really appreciated. However, that was partly because I moved to a very small town in a very remote location. I wish everyone could have this as a stop-gap when they move from their t, but it obviously isn't always an option.

You put it so clearly- we know we will stay in touch with our friends, but to just walk away from our t relationship is excruciating I'm really sorry you're going through this.

Originally Posted by rainboots87

Today was our second to last session and I was a mess for most of it. I could barely look at her as I left, and I sat in my car with my head on the steering wheel and cried until I felt okay enough to drive home. This sucks and is so freakin' hard.

(((((((rainboots)))))))

Ending the therapy relationship is so hard, especially when it's for a reason beyond our control and not because we're "done".

Have you thought about what you need in the last session? Having a good last session with T went a long way towards easing the pain a little bit for me, even though it was still really sad.

Thinking of you

[rainboots87]

Yeah, I'm supposed to decide how I want the last session to go since there was a lot of silence today, but I don't know what I want. I want to cancel and avoid the whole thing, but I also want to go and just spend the hour with her to be in her presence. I want it to be happy and my T said it can be difficult and sad, but also celebratory. I just know I'll be such a mess afterwards, if not during the session. And I could never really cancel.

I don't get why I'm so attached to her. I've only ever been attached like this to my first (and only) long-term T (2007-2008), my ex-bf (longest rship of 10 months, with half of it apart from each other), and now this T. I've had some attachments to my dietitians, but not quite this bad. I don't really miss friends or family, I was totally fine when most dating/rships ended other than the aforementioned bf, it's just these few people that I become so dependent on. I hate feeling so needy and like a big baby.

I wish I could hide under the covers forever.