[lbdrox]

I hate therapy. I'm sick of going and spilling all my feelings to someone. I feel like I could just do it at home by myself. And going to a female isn't fun. It's totally boring and I would much rather see a guy. I'm working on my depressive nature by making myself go out & do stuff. I've also been working on eating normally, working out, letting go of stress, etc.

I don't want to go back to her anymore.
But I have to because my school is paying for it. lol. They're not going to let me stop until I'm "cured." Does anyone have any thoughts on making it go faster? I'm totally working on myself outside of it. She didn't even tell me to do all the things I'm doing. In fact, we haven't really gotten anywhere yet and I've had 4 sessions already.

[~EnlightenMe~]

Originally Posted by lbdrox

I hate therapy. I'm sick of going and spilling all my feelings to someone. I feel like I could just do it at home by myself. And going to a female isn't fun. It's totally boring and I would much rather see a guy. I'm working on my depressive nature by making myself go out & do stuff. I've also been working on eating normally, working out, letting go of stress, etc.

I don't want to go back to her anymore.
But I have to because my school is paying for it. lol. They're not going to let me stop until I'm "cured." Does anyone have any thoughts on making it go faster? I'm totally working on myself outside of it. She didn't even tell me to do all the things I'm doing. In fact, we haven't really gotten anywhere yet and I've had 4 sessions already.

Can you request to see a male therapist? Tell your female therapist that it's not her, but that you really would prefer to see a male therapist. (If there is one available).

I don't know anything about going through a school and having them pay for it, but can you ask your current therapist what you have to do to stop therapy? The school stops paying once therapy stops, right? I'm sure I don't understand.

If you can possibly see a male therapist, I think that would help you open up more (?) I'm impressed at what you are doing outside of therapy

Keep posting and let us know how it is going. When do you see her again?

Why do you think seeing a male therapist would be more "fun"? Therapy isn't "fun" by the way; it's hard work. Kind of makes me wonder if you really want to work at this, since you mentioned this is apparently ordered by your school.

It is great that you are working on things outside of your sessions. That is what most of us do, and it is that outside work that is so important too because if the work only happens inside the session and doesn't transfer to outside the session, progress will be slow in coming.

Four sessions is really practically nothing so far, so don't get frustrated yet. You are still in the VERY early stages of therapy at only 4 sessions. Have some patience with the process.

[Sila]

Therapy is never easy. You're bringing up all these hard feelings, topics, and problems to the surface. The more you push them away, the harder it is to heal through them and learn/grow. That's why therapy hurts. You're "breaking" everything you've known for coping and learning new ways to do so. 4 sessions is still in the 'get to know you/your needs' stage. It'll take a few months or more to be able to trust more openly. But therapy isn't really 'fun'- it's work, but it's important and it's helpful.

That said, if you think a male therapist would be better suited to your needs or easier for you to trust, then you should be able to ask for one.

Having gone back and read some of your older threads, considering your romatic transference issues with your ex- male T, a female might be the best idea if it keeps that kind of issue from interfering with your progress, particularly considering your younger age.

[lbdrox]

Originally Posted by Antimatter

Can you request to see a male therapist? Tell your female therapist that it's not her, but that you really would prefer to see a male therapist. (If there is one available).

I don't know anything about going through a school and having them pay for it, but can you ask your current therapist what you have to do to stop therapy? The school stops paying once therapy stops, right? I'm sure I don't understand.

If you can possibly see a male therapist, I think that would help you open up more (?) I'm impressed at what you are doing outside of therapy

Keep posting and let us know how it is going. When do you see her again?

I'm going again on tuesday. It's enough time to show her how much I've done since last time!

[lbdrox]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

Why do you think seeing a male therapist would be more "fun"? Therapy isn't "fun" by the way; it's hard work. Kind of makes me wonder if you really want to work at this, since you mentioned this is apparently ordered by your school.

It is great that you are working on things outside of your sessions. That is what most of us do, and it is that outside work that is so important too because if the work only happens inside the session and doesn't transfer to outside the session, progress will be slow in coming.

Four sessions is really practically nothing so far, so don't get frustrated yet. You are still in the VERY early stages of therapy at only 4 sessions. Have some patience with the process.

lol, i know therapy isn't fun. I've been in the process with a male before... I guess I just keep comparing it to what it was last time, which wasn't real therapy. Having feelings for my therapist kept me busy, and it meant that I didn't have to work on anything, because he wasn't trained. However, I'm not really liking a female so much...

[lbdrox]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

Having gone back and read some of your older threads, considering your romatic transference issues with your ex- male T, a female might be the best idea if it keeps that kind of issue from interfering with your progress, particularly considering your younger age.

I don't know; I'm thinking about working with an older guy. I just like guys better in general because they're more chilled. They're also less emotional and easier for me to talk to.

[Butterflies Are Free]

Well, even though I always look forward to seeing my T, there are times after my sessions with her that I feel as though i've been through a battle of sorts. I have been with my current T for 7 years and still have hard moments. If you can, try to give this more time...

[wotchermuggle]

Four sessions isn't very much time. Hardly any time at all. You're just in the get-to-know-you phase.

[Victoria'smom]

I've had mostly male T's. My intake specialist was a male T and I doubt a more structure intake would get so much information out of me. I am not comfortable with female T's. However I stick with my female T because I need to learn to trust based on character not gender.

[~EnlightenMe~]

Like others have said, four sessions is really not alot at all. It take quite awhile to really get to know each other.

I think chosing the therapist's gender is an individual preference. My xT and others thought I should see a female T after termination.

I listened to their input, but instead I chose a male T again because I have difficulty trusting women. I need to work on building my fragmented ego/self and building acceptance of myself where I am now so I can move to where I want to be. I need to trust my therapist in order to do this. Maybe at a later point trusting female authority figures will be a goal, but it isn't one now. I may find out that I made a mistake, and needed to see a female therapist, but I am okay with making a mistake. It was a mistake made based on MY decision, not anyone else's.

So, do what YOU think is best for you. Make your own choice.

But Choose wisely, my friend

[lbdrox]

Originally Posted by Antimatter

Can you request to see a male therapist? Tell your female therapist that it's not her, but that you really would prefer to see a male therapist. (If there is one available).

I don't know anything about going through a school and having them pay for it, but can you ask your current therapist what you have to do to stop therapy? The school stops paying once therapy stops, right? I'm sure I don't understand.

If you can possibly see a male therapist, I think that would help you open up more (?) I'm impressed at what you are doing outside of therapy

Keep posting and let us know how it is going. When do you see her again?

AntiMatter, I spoke to the principal and she said there's no way she's letting me go to a male after my previous experience. So now I'm wondering if the reason I want to see a male T is because of transference? I guess it's possible, but also because I feel like this T is kind of like my mom. Not very warm, slightly critical & judging. Maybe I'm just turning her into my mom, like I turned my other T into my dad. Gosh..! I'm going to stick it out, only because I can't afford to pay for it by myself.

[Miswimmy1]

4 sessions is nothing... U are only getting started, I'm sry to say... Give it some time. Don't expect to open up by now. Trust isn't made overnight. Give it time, and if u still don't like the female t, then ask to switch.

[Miswimmy1]

Originally Posted by lbdrox

. Maybe I'm just turning her into my mom, like I turned my other T into my dad. Gosh..! I'm going to stick it out, only because I can't afford to pay for it by myself.

sounds like Transferance issues to me. I would stick with the female...