I don't know what happened but the other day I totally broke down and wept and sobbed like a baby. I have never lost control like that before and it scared me and t. She didn't want me to leave like that and tried to distract me by making apps for the next three weeks at the end. T wanted to know what my tears were saying and I couldn't tell her. I opened up about thmy abuser and how I see home regularly. T worries that I keep all of these secrets to myself.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by button30

I don't know what happened but the other day I totally broke down and wept and sobbed like a baby.

That's nothing to be ashamed of.
Most of us come to therapy with unshed tears!
Crying can be very therapeutic.

[geez]

Originally Posted by button30

I don't know what happened but the other day I totally broke down and wept and sobbed like a baby. I have never lost control like that before and it scared me and t. She didn't want me to leave like that and tried to distract me by making apps for the next three weeks at the end. T wanted to know what my tears were saying and I couldn't tell her. I opened up about thmy abuser and how I see home regularly. T worries that I keep all of these secrets to myself.

button how are you the rest of the time? The last time I cried in therapy was when I had my breakdown. Was this a cry that had something specific attached to it or are you crying all the time (depression?)?

[ECHOES]

Originally Posted by button30

I don't know what happened but the other day I totally broke down and wept and sobbed like a baby. I have never lost control like that before and it scared me and t. She didn't want me to leave like that and tried to distract me by making apps for the next three weeks at the end. T wanted to know what my tears were saying and I couldn't tell her. I opened up about thmy abuser and how I see home regularly. T worries that I keep all of these secrets to myself.

button30, I don't see this as losing control, but as finally feeling safe enough to let it out

[struggling2]

Originally Posted by ECHOES

button30, I don't see this as losing control, but as finally feeling safe enough to let it out

yes, what ECHOES said good job button, you are very brave!

[SallyBrown]

I'll also echo what ECHOES (ok I actually did not mean to do that but now I'm going to leave it there) said.

This is something that used to be really distressing to me too, and it still is and I still find myself resisting crying, but I consider it a good sign when I can cry in front of a T. It means I can make progress, which only happens with emotional honesty.

Originally Posted by CantExplain

That's nothing to be ashamed of.
Most of us come to therapy with unshed tears!
Crying can be very therapeutic.

I am ashamed of it because I couldn't control it. I cry most sessions but I can control myself mostly but I totally lost it the other day and broke down. Its never happened before.

Originally Posted by geez

button how are you the rest of the time? The last time I cried in therapy was when I had my breakdown. Was this a cry that had something specific attached to it or are you crying all the time (depression?)?

Hi Geez,
Sorry to hear about your breakdown I had one last year so I can really sympathise with you. I havent cried since I started my anti depressants which was two weeks ago and before this I used to cry everyday so maybe it was just a build up and I needed a release?

[rainbow_rose]

tho it may have been hard to experience that in session, it sounds very healing to me. hope you are feeling better, button.

Originally Posted by rainbow_rose

tho it may have been hard to experience that in session, it sounds very healing to me. hope you are feeling better, button.

hi Rainbow. I am feeling a lot better now I had time to process everything. it was just so out of the blue and caught me by surprise.

[Anne2.0]

Originally Posted by button30

hi Rainbow. I am feeling a lot better now I had time to process everything. it was just so out of the blue and caught me by surprise.

I think that is progress! Sometimes the best stuff of therapy (not just crying) happens unexpectedly. In a way the unexpected is just another way of experiencing growth or allowing yourself the opportunity to experience something new.

Originally Posted by Anne2.0

I think that is progress! Sometimes the best stuff of therapy (not just crying) happens unexpectedly. In a way the unexpected is just another way of experiencing growth or allowing yourself the opportunity to experience something new.

I never thought of it like that and I think you could be right. I always hold back in therapy and try and control my emotions but the other night I couldnt and afterwards it felt like a shift in me because I let T see I was vulnerable and scared and I wasn't ok like I always say I am.

[critterlady]

I'm glad you're feeling better about it, button. Being vulnerable with your T is a difficult thing.

I've cried in front of mine, but never really melted down with wracking sobs and all. I know it will happen one day, but I'm not exactly looking forward to it.

Originally Posted by critterlady

I'm glad you're feeling better about it, button. Being vulnerable with your T is a difficult thing.

I've cried in front of mine, but never really melted down with wracking sobs and all. I know it will happen one day, but I'm not exactly looking forward to it.

Critterlady don't be afraid of it because maybe it is what you need to heal. I was always afraid of showing my true feelings to everyone but T knew exactly what to do and distracted me at the end so I was ok to drive home. Next day I felt differently about it and realised that it is a good thing