Let go or Ignore

I recently post about sexual dreams with my T. Well, I had an appt with him. As usual it was little writing on his part and a lot of talking on my part. he caught himself last week about to say, "You look very Pretty today". He made a save by saying, "I mean you look very professional. Very professional". I immediately disregard. It was a simple mistake.
Well, yesterday during my session he asked me was I attracted to my psychiatrist. I laughed it off and told him the truth that I'm not. I explained I like smart people. I admire and respect him, however I am not attracted to him. Which is the truth. He then said, "Good, keep him in that box". Session ends.
Fast forward. Last night I was on the internet looking up something and stumble upon this article about my T. He had a relationship with a client. Nothing came of it. However, who ever wrote this article was not happy with him at all.
I went to bed feeling like I "uncovered" him. I feel like I know too much about him. I'm concerned now I won't be able to get any work done knowing this secret. I wish I didn't know. I respect him. He is always professional. Or, did my subconscious knew and that is why I kept having the dreams? I don't know... I feel physically sick today.

Belle

How did you come across this article- how can you know it's even true?

I was typing in some information about something he was working on. The information came up and the article was under it. I don't know. The only way to know is ask him. Would it be unprofessional to ask him about this?

I'm not sure it's a good idea, WhiteClouds. What do you hope asking him will achieve? If he confirms it's true, what would that mean to you? Regardless, my gut instinct would be that it's probably false anyway - people can write whatever they want on the internet.

Also, I know it feels really good to get a compliment from somebody you like and care about, but on the whole - and I honestly don't mean to shoot you down here - I wouldn't try and read too much into it. My T compliments me on outfits, hairstyle, and how I look in general/on the whole sometimes (on the days I don't go in looking like an ill tramp, haha), but there's no hidden meaning in it. It's just genuine. I've had similar compliments from teachers and other authority figures in the past too, but again, they're just sincere. They're not interested in a relationship with me in that way, you know?

'I also hate people who ask cheerfully how you are when they know you're feeling like hell and expect you to say 'Fine.'' - Sylvia Plath

Hi there Bashful!,
No i don't read anything into them. In all honesty I think I'm the one with some sick attraction to this man. SMH Rather embarrassing actually. I'm a married woman of 13 years and being attracted to the man who does my individual and marital counseling is rather embarrassing. Actually it's more pathetic than anything. It's so bad now someone has to do something deliberate, forward, and over the top for me to percieve it as a come on or attraction. I believe I have some messed up disorder that causes me to notice every little thing a male does towards me. So now I decided to disregard everything.
I don't know. I know he is my T. I know he does good work with me. I don't want him to feel embarrassed. Like I'm prying. The incident was reported in 2008, they didn't do anything until this year. Around the same time I was having to see him 2 times a week.
I think I just want to know is it true. If it is, it wouldn't have a negative impact on my perception on what I think of him as a professional. I wish I never saw it. He isn't unprofessional with me. I donno. Today I'm just all over the place after seeing this.

Therapy is the place where anything can be discussed. Go ahead and talk about it.

Yep. I think it'd be incredibly beneficial for you to talk about and work through this:

Do you think that's something you'd be able to do, or is it a no-go right now? I do think it would help, so long as he's supportive and can guide you through it, and ultimately, out the other end.

'I also hate people who ask cheerfully how you are when they know you're feeling like hell and expect you to say 'Fine.'' - Sylvia Plath

Oh heavens. I can't imagine actually saying something. I have a lot to process today. H came home for lunch and explained he feels jealous of me disclosing so much to my T. I think I may end my sessions with him. Last thing i want is for my H to ever feel insecure or jealous. My H explained that he feel like I should tell him everything. However, he ahs a listening problem. I don't know. Lord, I'm a wreck.