[Nelliecat]

Ok, so that's not difficult at the moment, I've spent a lot of the week alternately crying or sleeping. I went to the surgery this morning to ask for the dose of my anti depressants to be increased since I've been feeling increasingly worse recently, despite having regular exercise, eating well and trying to socialise.

Anyway to get to the point, I ended up seeing the doctor that no-one wants to see and as it was a 'sit and wait' clinic you can't choose who you see. He's cold and blunt and invalidating. I told him how things were and also told him I'd been having therapy for two years, he went on to assume that since I was feeling depressed again that therapy wasn't working, my therapist was probably just in it for the money, skeletons should be left in the closet, it did no good to bring them out if you can't get them all back in again. Therapy focuses on all the bad stuff and cancels out all the good, then when I told him I'd had thoughts of self harming he told me "well I don't believe you'd do that. You've got children so you won't hurt yourself".

So this is all with me in his room crying, I get out and realise he hasn't upped my meds, the prescription he's given me is just the same dose as before. And it took so much effort and guts to just get myself to the surgery. I've come out feeling and not achieved anything.

Now I'm having completely conflicting thoughts about therapy, should I stop or continue? And since my family pay for my sessions the decision to quit would benefit them financially

[anilam]

Stopping therapy while you're feeling this way could be dangerous. Please reconsider.
So what if one idiot thinks that therapy's not working (along with other 'well- informed' ideas- yeah, cause mum's never commit SUI?)- only you can be a judge of that.
Sucks that it is coming from sb who actually should know better but sadly some Pdocs don't- they're doing meds, most of them don't do therapy and some of them don't understand its process.

BTW I would file a complaint- he's dangerous- I would get a better advice from a stranger on the street- or I could at least say, hey what does he know, he's no professional.

[Nelliecat]

Thanks Anilam, I'm actually having a rare reaction for me in these situations, I'm feeling angry where I would usually feel completely in bits (I was and may be again later) but for now maybe this anger will help to keep things a bit clearer.

[Nightlight]

I'm sorry you're struggling and that the doctor you saw was so unhelpful. I had a similar experience with a psychiatrist a few months back (who funnily enough changed his mind completely the next time I saw him and told me therapy was the only way to go because medication wouldn't help someone like me).

It's hard not to take those words to heart sometimes and think the doctor may have a point, but I don't think it's helpful to listen to someone who clearly has no idea about the way therapy works. A lot of GPs seem to be a bit clueless. My GP has always been nice to me, but my T told me, she really didn't mean to, but she ended up letting me know that my own GP thinks I'm dependent on therapy. The reality is that my GP just doesn't understand what I gain from it. It sounds like the doctor you saw was really clueless and didn't help at all by not taking you seriously. I hope you're able to discuss this with your T soon. My T was quite helpful after my experience with the psychiatrist.

[Nelliecat]

Oh dear, now i'm crying again. See, now I'm going to get myself into such a tiz it will spiral down into 'I should be over all this, I should be working, I'm failing, I'm no good to anyone'.

I've copied my initial thread to my T just so she knows what's happened this morning.

[Nightlight]

It's okay to be upset. A doctor didn't hear you and really let you down. That wasn't fair and it's not fair when they don't have a half decent understanding of mental health stuff. I understand about the worry of the expensive of therapy too. It's all hard! Life is hard enough, so it would be nice if the people we go to for help could be a bit more onto it sometimes...but at least there's still therapy, right? Someone who really is on our sides.

[Nelliecat]

You know, what's the point? Maybe he's right, maybe I should take my meds and just feel nothing. I'm just chasing my tail.

[Nightlight]

How would you feel about hearing that a GP had thought those sorts of things about someone else? If he'd told someone else they wouldn't hurt themselves because they have kids? I know how these things can shake you up. I really know that, but I don't think you should let someone, who is so unhelpful, steer you in the wrong direction. I bet your T thinks something quite different about what's possible for you and what will help you, in comparison to what this GP thought. I'm sure your T also knows you a lot better than this GP.

Nelliecat, don't let one bad GP ruin therapy for you. After all this guy doesn't know you from Adam. He may have had a bad T experience or maybe he has issues he isn't willing to face. I say get a second opinion.

[catsrhelm]

Fire him or her. If you are not comfortable with a doctor or therapist, that is a red flag. Have you considered seeking out someone else?

[BlessedRhiannon]

I'm so sorry your GP was an idiot. Keep that in mind, though...in this regard, he was being an idiot!! You know the truth about your therapy and whether or not it's working for you. Can you call your T and have a quick chat about how you're feeling right now? Can you try to get back that anger that the GP was an invalidating idiot who has a really sucky bedside manner and should keep his mouth shut when it comes to mental health issues?

[Nelliecat]

Thank you for all your replies and support. A friend of mine recognised how bad I could potentially feel if I left this and called the surgery, explained what had happened and took me back to see another doctor. He wasn't brilliant but I have got an increase in my meds. I also emailed my T to ask for an extra session next week. Still lots of tears but I've asked for help.

[pbutton]

I am SO glad to hear that you were able to get better help.

[skysblue]

Continue with therapy. You get support there. GP gave you nothing except pain and grief. Don't listen to him

What an ignorant man; ignorant, as in rude and ignorant as in not understanding anything and being ignorant of the facts. Just because he believes medication can fix everything other people believe that talking fixes everything. He shouldn't push his beliefs on you nor should you believe anything he says.
Therapy takes time and if you have noticed an improvement, then therapy is working for you. I hope you will not let this man influence your therapy and your mental health Nelliecat

Can you change GP's? Doctors are supposed to listen to us not judge us.
Don't listen to him about the therapy, sounds like he has a chip on his shoulder.
What an idiot.