How many people feel they got 'enough' care/love from their mother or father or someone else significant growing up?

Just to add this isn't about apportioning blame.

I voted not sure, as how do I know what enough is? Maybe I expected too much and maybe I didn't, its all relative.

[precious things]

I certainly did but somewhere along the way I felt undeserving and pushed any feelings of love out of my life.

Oh now I don't know....I was loved but maybe there were undercurrents of manipulation that made it feel...not genuine?

I think we do know once we begin to work on ourselves. I use to think something was very wrong with me, never doubted my step parents for a moment during my early adulthood, but then when drunk would begin to tell another tale, felt confused, ungrateful until I begun the work of recovery and came to understand it alll better.

[tinyrabbit]

No. But it has been very hard to let myself see this.

[stopdog]

I think I might have had too much of the wrong kind

so its not the amount, its the kind? That makes sense, as what we experience, by default is the norm. We need to know what kind was the right kind.

[WikidPissah]

abuse/neglect from narcissistic mother and alcoholic pervert father.

So I definitely said no.

[ECHOES]

They did the best they could, all things considered (their issues, their knowledge, the times - when 'love' was a roof over your head, food on the table, clothes to wear...) But, no, I didn't feel loved. I felt like an unwanted bother.

[justmemaybe]

I put not sure............but after thinging about it. I was loved. My mom did very much. My Dad did the best he could. I guess I felt at times I was taking care of them.

[scorpiosis37]

For me, that is a very easy, uncomplicated "no, absolutely not." There wasn't even anyone around to wish that they were giving me love. I know that i lived in the same house as my "mother" growing up, but i literally never saw her. She was never my caregiver. She never made me one meal, said one word to me, changed one diaper, gave me one hug, etc. I distinctly remember cracking my head on our marble steps as a young child and she just left me bleeding there on the floor while she ate dinner within eyesight of me. Had our housekeeper not arrived and called an ambulance, i would have died. In general, she spent her day out shopping while I was home alone or with the abusive nanny. My dad was loving on the rare occasions he was around, but he didn't believe me about the abuse, so it continued. So even though he was caring for a couple of hours a week, his failure to protect me the other 95% of the time was not good enough. I never heard the words "I love you" or experienced a hug until I began dating as an adolescent.

definitely felt loved from my dad and g-ma. but my dad should have protected us from our mom. she hated us. i am slowing coming to that realization and it just hurts.

my gma is who loved us the most, she literally saved our lives...

[pbutton]

Both of my parents love me. They are both also very dysfunctional and couldn't provide the type of parenting that would have been supportive.

I didn't, because my parents paid very little attention to me. There were no other relatives living in my state. I took care of me. And as soon as I was able (whatever young age), I made myself food, did my own laundry, etc.

Originally Posted by tractionbeam0610

I didn't, because my parents paid very little attention to me. There were no other relatives living in my state. I took care of me. And as soon as I was able (whatever young age), I made myself food, did my own laundry, etc.

This! And when they did pay me attention it was mainly negative. So It was OJT to care for myself and syblings physically and emotionally.

[critterlady]

My parents did the best they could when I was little, but their best was not Good Enough.

[refika]

Definitely not! My parents "Say" they loved me, but never showed it or conveyed it in a way I felt it.

That's half the reason I'm seeing a T today.

[suzzie]

no didnt get enough.
not sure i got any.
but must have got some.

[Victoria'smom]

My parents both tried really hard. I feel they did good given everyone had mental illness in our house. I also had a wonderful close extended family. My problems come from genetics and having untreated mental illness for 22 yrs.