[Fixated]

I know...I know. This gets brought up ad nauseum, and it's probably nothing, but I am looking for a reason to binge, so everything means something to me.

A few weeks ago I was talking to T about a webpage I designed at work, and how proud I was of it. Almost without thinking, I said that I wished I could show it to her. She said, well you could send me the link.

The page was finally published this week, and I sent her the link last night as I was using the page to include in job applications.

I have not gotten a response. This is very unusual as she almost always responds between 11 and 1 the next day.

The feeling aren't as strong as they would have been in the past, but I still feel let down and stupid. I wish I could take it back. I just wanted her to like it or be proud of me.

[precious things]

Ah, that's hard when you put parts of the real you out there and you are left with that hanging feeling. For all you know your t loved it and plans on bringing it up at the next session . I wouldn't assume she doesn't care ( I know, easy to say). Hang in there

[gayleggg]

I'm sure something came up that has kept her from replying to you. Give her time. I'm sure she will be proud of you. Keep your head up and know that you did a good job.
Gayle

[rainbow8]

I'm sure she'll bring it up and tell you how great it is, at your next session. Though, once I sent T something and she didn't answer because she never received it! A possibility.

I understand your feelings because I remember how hurt and upset I was when my T didn't email back after I emailed her the news of the birth of a granddaughter. I was out-of-town so I was going to miss a couple of weeks. I couldn't imagine why she didn't answer me with even a brief "congratulations".

When I saw her again, she said that she didn't email back because she was going to tell me in the session.

That was devastating to me, even though we had a "no response to my emails rule".

In your case, you said she "almost always responds between 11 and 1" Maybe her computer crashed or she had to do something other than read emails at that time. Or she was swamped with work or other emails. I'm sure she'll get to yours! Hang in there.

Hey fixated,
Congrats on the new webpage
There are many reasons why t didn't reply but I am sure it is nothing personal.
By sending her the link, you were risking getting hurt if t didn't reply and realisticly t didn't have to reply. She could just be waiting to talk to you in person, would you prefer that or really did you just want to connect with t between sessions? I know it was her suggestion to send her the link. I suppose what I am trying to ask is how important is your ts approval to you?

[Perna]

Originally Posted by Fixated

I just wanted her to like it or be proud of me.

You make it sound like a limited time offer Be proud and tell me immediately or. . . She can't wait and tell you what she thinks face-to-face (where you can see her bursting with pride in person :-) when you next see each other?

[likelife]

I'm sorry, fixated. I know how hard it can be to wait for this kind of thing. I had a very similar experience, having sent my T a link to a website I designed (it's not something I typically do). She had also asked me to send the link, but didn't talk with me about it until a couple of sessions down the road.

Sounds like you feel proud of your work? Congratulations on the accomplishment!

Fixated. I think it is huge. For you at least. I hope you are able to tell T how it made you feel and that she honours that hurt.
Well done on the web page!

[Fixated]

Thanks everyone for your great responses. In combination with other bad things yesterday, I had pretty much decided to binge after work. As I was pulling into the grocery store parking lot, my phone beeped that I had a new e-mail.

It was from T.

Her response was odd, but she did say it was impressive and she DID respond.

I was struck and confused. I'd decided to binge. I was ready for it...almost looking forward to it. Yet one of the main reasons for my desire had just been taken away.

I sat in my car for a good 15 minutes and argued back and forth with myself. I then went into the store and continued arguing with myself.

In the end, I bought all the makings of a good episode, which is disappointing. But I only completed phase 1 (if you will) which was barely past full. I felt relief and no great desire for a disastrous phase 2. I guess that's a silver lining.

So T responded. It wasn't all that I'd been hoping for, but she did. I guess I'll have to talk to her about it today in session. Major embarrassment.

Thanks again for listening.

The thing with any addiction is we do it when we feel bad & we do it when we feel good.
Glad your T replied!