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Member Since Jun 2013
Posts: 36
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#1
I'm not exactly sure where to put this. I was going through a rough time today, and I was SI (something I am working on). Then out of nowhere, I was just transported to this other place. I have no idea how to describe this, but it was dark all around me (I think I had my eyes closed) and even though it was in the afternoon, it was completely dark around me. I saw flashes of things, I don't know if I couldn't identify it or if I don't remember what they were. I think there were some people too. I was frantic and didn't know where I was or what was going on. It was really, really strange and I don't know how to describe it. It felt like my body was jerking and it was out of my control, especially my head. And I heard the strangest sound in my head, it was either of a door creaking really really loudly or of a bed spring. But I was alone at home, and there were no other sound. I felt like I was just in another state of consciousness. It only lasted for a minute, as soon as I realized where I was. And I was still sitting in the same position as before.
I googled it but couldn't find anything. I don't suffer from epilepsy or anything else like that. I don't have any memory of abuse, but I have an idea that it might have happened and I just can't remember. My best guess is that it was a flashback. I sometimes have them but only emotionally. Coming out of that I didn't feel any emotion, expect maybe fear. My T is on a two week vacation, and I still have about a week to go. I feel like I'm going crazy and all these things are just popping up. I have no idea how to make sense of these things. Any help would be appreciated? |
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Raging Quiet, ThisWayOut
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#2
Lily, I'm not sure I'm a lot of help here... but I will say that when I started therapy and was talking about stuff from the past... I had some really strange things happen to me that I never tried to put a "label" on... so I don't think its too uncommon.
Hopefully there are some others here on PC who will have something that might relate to what you experienced. |
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Pandita-in-training
Member Since Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
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#3
Hard to tell with the SI too. Since it went so fast, you have been alone in the house with only your own thoughts, etc. for awhile and you did not identify anything, I don't think it was a flashback particularly, just a glitch in your neurons firing, kind of like how our dreams are, they may make unconscious sense but not conscious? Feeling faint or a drop in blood pressure, etc. lots of things can cause weird sensations/sights/sounds, etc.
I use to have a "burst" of thought like a surprised covey of quail taking flight (everything happening all at once going in all directions) a reaction to a random but charged thought or comment (if I was in T). My face would register all the emotions going on too and once my T actually laughed and then immediately apologized, explaining how "funny" my face had looked and I told her it was okay, it felt weird so I could imagine it looked weird too. I always thought and felt about things differently after one of those (only had 4-5 in my life) and just assumed my brain had gotten tired of doing things the hard/long way and had rerouted all my neurons/wiring more "correctly" all at once __________________ "Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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