I told t that I was afraid of everything and everyone and that I don't know what is happening to me but I am getting triggered by everything. I told her how I can't talk to her or anyone anymore, how I want to isolate myself from everyone. I told her how I was in a crisis and in turmoil and I don't know how to fix myself anymore. I bared my soul to her and now I feel awful. She can't fix me, I can only fix me but I dont know how anymore and I am scared.

[Syra]

That sounds like such a painful place to be. You are afraid of everything and everyone, and triggered by everything, and you just want to be by yourself. But you don't know how to fix yourself, and she is included in "everyone," so you don't know how to get out of this? Is that what's it like.
And you've told her all this, but she can't fix you, so you are feel awful telling her, and scared about how you are going to get this fixed. Is that it?

[SkinnySoul]

You are right, only you can "fix" yourself. And by sending that email you just proved that you WANT to.

You want to communicate, you want to find people to share your thoughts and life with. Even writing on this forum means you haven't given up on people.
I know it's scary, I know it's easier for you to stay in bed all day and see no-one at all, do nothing at all... But you're stronger than that.

I feel this way very often, it sucks... All I can do is give you a huge hug and remind you that you are strong and deserve a better life.

[tinyrabbit]

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

She can't fix me, I can only fix me but I dont know how anymore

It's your job to fix you. But it's your T's job to know how and to help you do it.

(((hugs)))

[Asiablue]

Im glad you've shared this with her, she needs to know this stuff and it''s one of the few times you've actually reached out to her. Yes you need to do the work but who says you need to do it alone? Let her help xx

Originally Posted by Syra

That sounds like such a painful place to be. You are afraid of everything and everyone, and triggered by everything, and you just want to be by yourself. But you don't know how to fix yourself, and she is included in "everyone," so you don't know how to get out of this? Is that what's it like.
And you've told her all this, but she can't fix you, so you are feel awful telling her, and scared about how you are going to get this fixed. Is that it?

yes thats it Syra, I am scared of getting fixed or maybe I am scared of telling t all of this and what she will say, she knows I have been in a crisis but yet she wanted me to take a break. IDK

Originally Posted by SkinnySoul

You are right, only you can "fix" yourself. And by sending that email you just proved that you WANT to.

You want to communicate, you want to find people to share your thoughts and life with. Even writing on this forum means you haven't given up on people.
I know it's scary, I know it's easier for you to stay in bed all day and see no-one at all, do nothing at all... But you're stronger than that.

I feel this way very often, it sucks... All I can do is give you a huge hug and remind you that you are strong and deserve a better life.

Sorry you feel this way too skinny, its so hard. I want to be close to people but I keep them at a distance, even t because I can't risk getting hurt again and letting someone in. I DO want to be fixed but I really dont know where to begin anymore. I am afraid of myself even.

Originally Posted by tinyrabbit

It's your job to fix you. But it's your T's job to know how and to help you do it.

(((hugs)))

This is true and I feel this is the problem, maybe she doesnt know how to fix me.