[BlessedRhiannon]

So - I just need to work something out before my next session with my T. I have something that I think I should probably talk to her about, but I'm not sure how to bring it up or even if I really should. My T is an ED specialist, but that's not why I chose her. She's also really, really good with anxiety issues and we just click really well and I've made more progress than with any other T. That said, I do have some eating issues, and it was in the back of my head when I selected her as my T. We've talked briefly about my history of eating issues, and it still crops up from time to time, especially when I'm feeling particularly anxious.

My eating issues are not something I would consider severe, but I've noticed some patterns that I'd like to talk to her about. I feel kinda stupid bringing it up, though, because, like I said, it's mostly under control and not a serious issue. I kinda brought it up right at the end of our last session, but I'd already had one panic attack during our session and I didn't want to have another! So, I just mentioned it right at the end of the session, literally as I was walking out. I think that probably annoyed T a bit. I know she's a little concerned about my eating habits, but it's not something she presses, except to make sure that when my anxiety is high, that I'm still eating.

Without going in to detail, I've noticed certain urges related to food and eating, that I struggle not to follow through on. I'm not sure what's behind those urges. I can mostly resist them...the more anxious I am, the harder it is to resist...but I'm bothered by the fact that I feel these urges. I want to talk to T about it, but at the same time, I'm not usually following those urges, and I can control them (most of the time), so I'm not sure it's worth talking about. I just keep waffling on this...pat of me feels it's not serious enough to talk about; part of me keeps thinking about what my T has said to me in the past - it's better to talk about things early on, before they become an issue.

I'm open to feedback...I'm just trying to work out in my head how to bring it up and if to even do so.

[laughattack]

My response is to bring it up. If it something that doesn't need a lot of discussion, then at least you will have informed your T of the issue, in case later it becomes a bigger issue. Kinda what you said...

I guess the best feedback I can give you on how to work up to getting your thoughts out of your mouth in therapy is to write them down...whether in a list formoat or brainstorm format or just write them out and bring that into your next session and let her know at the beginning that you have some things that you have been keeping inside that you have wanted to tell her but haven't been able to get it out. Let her know you wrote it down and either yoh try and read it to her or hand it to her and let her read it if you can't. I have done that with my T with things that are just too hard for me to initially say without writing it down first. She always gives me as much time as I need to read it and makes me breath beforehand because I struggle with anxiety qnd panic attacks as well. I don't know if this helps any...but this is what has helped me some.

[Victoria'smom]

I'm not sure it's worth talking about. I just keep waffling on this...pat of me feels it's not serious enough to talk about this tells me it is something to talk about.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Thanks guys - I KNOW I should talk to my t about it. But, I don't want to make a big deal about it either. It's not a big deal (right now), but I know it could eventually evolve in to a larger issue. Sigh....I'm just not sure how to bring it up.

And, now I've had something else happen today that I need to talk to T about, so I need to see how much we can cover in just an hour. We already have one topic that I told her I wanted to talk about, and now I have these other two things.

Okay guys, send me some good vibes that I don't just decide to push this off and not talk about it.

[BlessedRhiannon]

So, I'm disappointed in myself. I didn't bring this up in session today. I should have, but we were running out of time and I told T that I had a few things I needed to talk about and that we could push some to the next time we meet. I didn't tell her exactly what this was about, just "I need to talk about something I realized last Saturday." I was more specific with the other things, and then I asked T for some help prioritizing. Of course, with being so non-specific on this one, she suggested we wait on it.

It's actually probably good that I'm waiting until next week, since I think it probably needs more than the 5 or 10 minutes I had left today, but I'm disappointed that I couldn't even tell T what I really needed to talk about. Maybe I'll email her next week and just give her a heads up about this, so that she can help me to give it the time I need in our session.

Emailing sounds like a good idea that way t can bring it up instead of you trying to remember.
this strikes me as something important to you from reading your post and you have said a few times that your ED is not severe but it IS important. Sometimes its hard to bring up all of the things we plan to bring into therapy on any given week but as this has been playing on your mind ever since and you have noticed a pattern, then it is important and should be talked about when you are ready.