[ready2makenice]

How do you all make the call when to reach out to your T?

I use to constantly reach out to my T about everything now I've stopped completely,only to schedule/reschedule and cancel appointments. I do not contact my T through phone/text or email.

I admitted myself into the hospital over the weekend and never reached out or told my T,she has no idea and I feel I couldn't reach out to her because she's not available (especially during the weekends) and now it's like I'm a bit angry with T.

I guess I was wondering how do you all know when to involve your T or reach out to them for help/struggles? What does it take to reach out? What kind of reason do you reach out to your T between sessions?

[stopdog]

I write the first one I see when I think that telling another human something might be useful but I don't want to deal with the interference/emotions of an actual person. So like when I got injured and was sort of scared and hurt but had to go be the adult to teach a class, I will wrote and told the first one because I know she won't get all involved or call or act all care-ish. She will stay back, leaving me free to tell someone safely so I can then go on and be an adult in my real life.

I have called the other one when I wanted some response but not too much. I think in almost 4 years - I have called 3 times.

[A Red Panda]

I've never been in any real crisis where I would need to contact my T.

But I've left him messages on his work voice mail twice - both times when I've freaked out over issues with getting my prescription and worries over confidentiality. I've also drunk emailed him while I was trying to NOT have a panic attack (it seemed to be how I was calming myself down - there were people in the other room in my flat and I couldn't escape the situation)...

Mostly though, I just drop him an email with things that I find too difficult for me to say - or I'll email with topics that I know I need to address but that I won't unless I have an email to hold me accountable. Usually I preface the email with "Don't reply, just print out for session" but sometimes I forget to type that and he takes that as freedom for him to respond, so then I feel guilty.

I am not one to contact my T much out of session, but when I am in a crisis that hinges on emergency, I have to qualms about picking up that phone.

Is there some reason your T could not have gotten any kind of message from you over the weekend? Or was that because you didn't feel comfortable calling?

If your choice not to call was your choice, then direct your frustration with yourself and that is certainly something you need to discuss with her upon your return. There should be an avenue for communication in those kinds of emergencies generally.

To contact either my T or my Pdoc outside normal hours, I call their answering service and they contact them for me. My T or Pdoc calls me back and we deal with whatever needs to be dealt with. Honestly, they would be perturbed with me if I didn't contact them and it was an emergency.

I hope you are doing a bit better. Really, have this conversation with your T. It's important.

[Petra5ed]

I have often wanted to talk or email, but I only very rarely have emailed. I think the couple times I did say something in email, it was brief and also related to scheduling. It's really difficult sometimes, because I get the feeling I could email if I wanted to, but I am embarrassed.

[anilam]

I don't. I would let my T know I'm in hospital if I wasn't able to make it to our session. I fail to see why so many ppl would (and actually do), must be helping them somehow
Did you stop because you felt you were imposing on her/she told you to/it wasn't helpful?

[caseygirl]

I'm sorry about the hospital admission, but if you were in crisis you did the right thing. Taking that step takes so much strength...

When I admitted myself, my T knew I was suicidal and I told her at our previous T session. I didn't inform her until after I was admitted though, and thankfully her voice mail picked up as I didn't want to speak with her for some reason while I was in hospital. I was in bad shape and didn't want to rehash anything.

[BlessedRhiannon]

I would definitely contact my T to let her know if I were in the hospital. However, I try to contact T prior to getting to that point, so that we can work to keep me out of the hospital.

I think that the need to contact a T is different for each person and each T. It's something you should talk to your T about and explore why you're hesitant to contact her, what her preference is, etc.

[willowbrook]

I agree with what BlessedRhiannon said. This is something you should bring up with your T so that you can know her position on contact outside of session, and also why you have trouble doing so, especially when it sounds like the situation warrants it.

I've been told to call Pdoc's clinic and ask to speak to him if I'm in crisis, which so far I haven't needed to do. I do email my Pdoc between sessions with notes on how I'm doing. He said he finds it helpful, because I'm usually quite detailed with what I write and he can then make his own notes on what we might need to spend more time on or talk about.