[crazycat000]

I have only ever gotten one hug from my T, but I wish I could have a hug ever session that I can hold on to until the next one. So, I was wondering how often your therapist hugs you, and if you are satisfied with the amount, want less or want more hugs.

[Daeva]

I got hugged twice, same day. I was in the psych ward and I threw myself on her twice, second time she held me. That was in the beginning of Sept, I haven't hugged her since.

[Leah123]

Whenever I ask.

[The_little_didgee]

Never. I don't expect that from her at all. It doesn't bother me one bit, because I know she cares. Her words and actions are good enough for me.

[Jordy]

Mine kind of half hugged me a couple times... I think she would do more, but I wouldn't feel comfortable doing more. Even though I wish I could...

[Asiablue]

I voted never. I've only seen her like 9 times so to early to tell if we'll do the hug thing. She did say at the intake interview she's open to hugging if a client wants that. I haven't felt the need for hugs from her really at this stage but am glad it's an option.
My first T, we hugged after every session, i liked that. But even then, that didn't start happening until 5 months in or something. If my new t hugs me i want it to be because she wants to and not just for my benefit. So really it will depend on the relationship that forms between us and if it happens organically.

[Jdog123]

We hug at the end of each session. We started this perhaps 3 months into seeing each other--we've been seeing each other now for almost 3.5 years. It just happened naturally after we had one of our first really connected sessions. Sometimes we hug at the beginning--we do this when we've had a break or I've had a difficult time between sessions. I didn't ask at the beginning about hugs, but I could just tell she was someone who did and we also talked about how my last therapist and I hugged.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by Asiablue

I voted never. I've only seen her like 9 times so to early to tell if we'll do the hug thing. She did say at the intake interview she's open to hugging if a client wants that. I haven't felt the need for hugs from her really at this stage but am glad it's an option.
My first T, we hugged after every session, i liked that. But even then, that didn't start happening until 5 months in or something. If my new t hugs me i want it to be because she wants to and not just for my benefit. So really it will depend on the relationship that forms between us and if it happens organically.

I feel the same way (although I voted other mainly because I am not currently in Therapy right now), with my last Therapist I had a day tentatively scheduled that I planed to discuss touch with (and if she hugs or not) her but I got terminated before we reached that date.

A prior Therapist of mine I never tried to hug until the final session but she rejected it (giving me a handshake instead but I was too upset to really feel anything by than).

[Karrebear]

Never. I think I'd feel uncomfortable if she did.

[archipelago]

I had a shrink who was too reserved for contact. Only once did he touch my hand. Then when I switched to my current shrink after a while we started to hug usually at the end of session though sometimes as a greeting gesture. Mostly now it is just that, a gesture. It has become normalized so it is not something that I think about all that much or feel needy about. Occasionally when having a hard time, he will ask me if he can give me a hug. I find that soothing. He is very strong so I feel held emotionally as well as physically. It just works to bolster my defenses because mine are often not strong enough. But the fact that he asks me is even at this late stage shows respect for me and the gentleman that he is.

[Grey Matter]

Never. She seems too distant for it and it makes sense for me. I wouldn't like her hugging me, anyway.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by archipelago

I had a shrink who was too reserved for contact. Only once did he touch my hand. Then when I switched to my current shrink after a while we started to hug usually at the end of session though sometimes as a greeting gesture. Mostly now it is just that, a gesture. It has become normalized so it is not something that I think about all that much or feel needy about. Occasionally when having a hard time, he will ask me if he can give me a hug. I find that soothing. He is very strong so I feel held emotionally as well as physically. It just works to bolster my defenses because mine are often not strong enough. But the fact that he asks me is even at this late stage shows respect for me and the gentleman that he is.

Exactly I believe that hugs should be reserved for very special occasions, which is why I probably felt no need to even try to hug my Therapist of 4 years until the very last session.

Interestingly after a very tough Family session (which included a lot of yelling) I sort of wanted to hug the Family Therapist at the end of it, but since I didn't know what her stance on it was (it was our first and turned out to be only session with her) I didn't ask for one. I was going to meet with her alone the following week (since my parents were going to be out of town) and I was planning on discussing that with her although I ended up leaving the practice all together a few days prior when my Therapist decided (or really her supervisor decided) to terminate me with her (she was going to have me see someone else but I declined that for several reasons).

[vans1974]

After every session! She rocks!!

[critterlady]

I wasn't sure how to answer, since my T hugs me when I ask for a hug. He never initiates them and I don't think he ever will. We've talked about it and that's his practice. In most cases, he's happy to give hugs when asked, but won't even extend his hand for a handshake unless his client initiates it. He has a lot of clients with physical or sexual abuse in their history and it's too much of a risk for him to initiate any physical contact, especially with female clients.

When I finally broke down and talked to him about how I felt untouchable when I sat there crying and he provided no physical comfort, he told me that I could ask for hugs if I needed them. I've done that a handful of times since. He's a great hugger.

[purplemystery]

Never, and I know she never would except maybe the last day that I ever see her. And even then, I would have to ask, and it would be a toss-up about what she would say. It's fine with me because hugs would only feel awkward for me. Though perhaps I will ask her for a hug on the last day.

[stopdog]

The ones I see have promised not to touch me.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by critterlady

I wasn't sure how to answer, since my T hugs me when I ask for a hug. He never initiates them and I don't think he ever will. We've talked about it and that's his practice. In most cases, he's happy to give hugs when asked, but won't even extend his hand for a handshake unless his client initiates it. He has a lot of clients with physical or sexual abuse in their history and it's too much of a risk for him to initiate any physical contact, especially with female clients.

When I finally broke down and talked to him about how I felt untouchable when I sat there crying and he provided no physical comfort, he told me that I could ask for hugs if I needed them. I've done that a handful of times since. He's a great hugger.

I would like this to be the case in general since I hate giving handshakes (they creepy to me for some reason), I sort of felt manipulated when my last Therapist's supervisor sort of made me shake her hand right before the "interrogation" session.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by purplemystery

Never, and I know she never would except maybe the last day that I ever see her. And even then, I would have to ask, and it would be a toss-up about what she would say. It's fine with me because hugs would only feel awkward for me. Though perhaps I will ask her for a hug on the last day.

If you do make sure that you ask beforehand and be prepared for rejection (although honestly I think that I would have felt worse had I asked for one beforehand and she said no).

all the time and any time we ask

[healingme4me]

Never, and I'm perfectly satisfied by that. For me, it'd be awkward.

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

[lightcatcher]

T has held me before. And I know all I have to do is ask for a hug and T will give me one; thing is that Im too scared to ask. Think T is trying to make me learn to ask. \

I want a hug I really do, I just dont want to ask.

[ready2makenice]

Almost every session,I feel like I need it to carry me through sometimes. I never got too many hugs growing up,so I take them as much as I can (only from females though) no male touch.

Sometimes I ask T if I can have one and other times,she ask me for one,knowing that I need it. It's comforting and I like it,I approve!!

[Asiablue]

Originally Posted by RTerroni

I would like this to be the case in general since I hate giving handshakes (they creepy to me for some reason), I sort of felt manipulated when my last Therapist's supervisor sort of made me shake her hand right before the "interrogation" session.

On the matter of touch i don't think there should be any "shoulds" it is a very personal and subjective thing and it needs to be something agreed between each therapist and client.

[dillpickle1983]

Never been touched or hugged by my T.

Sent from the pickle jar using TapaTalk 4 pro.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by Asiablue

On the matter of touch i don't think there should be any "shoulds" it is a very personal and subjective thing and it needs to be something agreed between each therapist and client.

True so why did the supervisor almost insist that I give her a handshake even after I sort of hinted that I didn't want one.

I think that the last Family Therapist had it right, when she was walking up to me to bring me and my family back she came up to me sort of looking like she would give me a handshake if I wanted one but when I kept my hands in my pockets she backed off and just led us back into the room.